Here are two more installments of Everything You Need To Know About Saturday Night Live. This series is obviously done in cooperation with — and perhaps on assignment from — Peacock or some entity that controls or markets the series but it's still very informative. Here's their overview of Season Three…

And here's Season Four…

Today's COVID test was negative so I'm going to stop testing until there's a reason to think I might have had a new exposure.  I made it through Comic-Con without infection and my sympathies go out to those who weren't as fortunate.  My left foot's a lot better, too.

I'm also pretty happy with the political news, as well.  I'm sure there will be moments between now and 11/5/2024 when I won't be but right this minute, things seem to be going in the right direction.  It's kinda fun seeing George Conway going on every single TV show and podcast to tell the world that Donald Trump is a a narcissistic sociopath. Before long, I expect to see him saying this on Sesame Street, House of the Dragon, The Price is Right and…well, just about everything except Presumed Innocent.

Gonna spend my Saturday writing but I have some posts "in inventory" which might turn up here later today.

Like a lot of films that spawn many imitations, the 1980 movie Fame doesn't seem quite as special a few decades after I first saw it. But I watched it again recently and still liked it a lot, especially this number performed by Irene Cara…

It is said that the financial empire that is Las Vegas was built on people who are bad at math. I sometimes think the same about McDonald's.

I don't like many fast food hamburgers but I enjoy theirs every so often. The pricing though can be puzzling…and I should explain here that all the prices I cite are what I presently see on the McDonald's app. They may change tomorrow or they may be showing you different pricing based on your geography.

I should also mention that I prefer my McDonald's burgers with no pickles and no cheese but that omitting these elements does not alter any prices. No matter what the size of the burger, they charge me forty cents if I ask for an extra slice of cheese but don't deduct a cent from my order if I have them leave the cheese off a burger that comes with cheese. Now then…

I can order a regular McDonald's hamburger for $2.79. That gives me a burger with ketchup, mustard and onions and one hamburger patty that weighs a tenth-of-a-pound, which I assume is the pre-cooked weight. The app will let me add a number of extra items for upcharges like bacon, mayo or shredded lettuce but it won't let me add another patty.

For that, I have to order the McDouble, which is the same thing but with two of those tenth-pound patties. That's $3.49 so the extra patty costs me seventy cents. That, as you'll see, is a bargain but this is the only time an extra patty will cost me seventy cents. If I want to add two or three more of those same patties, these will cost me $1.29 each. A McDouble with three patties would therefore run me $4.78.

Or for no good reason, I can spend eleven cents more and order the Triple Cheeseburger — the exact same thing with three patties — for $4.89. An additional patty on one of those is again $1.29. That's for the same-size patty that cost me seventy cents when I upgraded from the Hamburger to the McDouble.

Ah, but let's say I decide I don't want any of those translucent tenth-of-a-pound patties. Not for me! Feeling more carnivorous, I decide I want quarter-pound patties. Your basic McDonald's Quarter-Pounder which comes with one of them is $5.79. That's right: A McDonald's burger with .25 pounds of beef in it costs ninety cents more than a McDonald's burger with .3 pounds of beef in it.

If I decide to add another quarter-pound patty to my Quarter-Pounder, that's $2.49 more so that burger would be $8.28. Or I could save a buck twenty-nine — the same amount as one of those extra tenth-of-a-pound patties — and purchase a Double Quarter Pounder for $6.99. Both of those Quarter-Pounders are cheeseburgers but I would have them omit the cheese and, like I said, that doesn't lower any prices.

This is all very confounding. Do you ever get the feeling that this company is run by a clown?

Some of you are going to get hooked on this. Two gents named Jon Schneider and James Stephens have started a YouTube show called Everything You Need To Know About Saturday Night Live — a history of that now-institutional late night program. Every week or so, they put up a new episode of roughly 10-15 minutes summarizing what transpired in one season: Who was in the cast? What were the memorable sketches? What were the firsts? That kind of thing.

The info seems solid and the clips are well-chosen. It's really a very well-done presentation. Here's the first episode covering, of course, Season One…

And here's their coverage of Season Two…

They're currently up to Season Seven and it gets especially interesting in Season Six when the original cast and most of the writers depart and NBC has to rebuild. I'm going to embed them all here, two a day until we catch up…but if you don't want to wait for me, you can find subsequent episodes on this page. I would suggest though going in order. It's a remarkable story about a remarkable show.

Another COVID test. Another negative result. I think I'm safe.

I need to keep reminding myself that five days at Comic-Con is not just five days at Comic-Con. There are also several days of prep and several of recovery. I'm almost unpacked. I'm almost back to my normal pace of work. I'm almost caught up on sleep. Here are some other things I oughta mention…

One of the "challenges" I gave the cartoonists this year at Quick Draw! was to draw something that would show us what the con would be like if it moved, as some have suggested, to Las Vegas. When I mentioned that possibility, just about everyone in Room 6BCF gave out with a pretty loud groan of disapproval. I think the folks who want to see Comic-Con move to Sin City are drastically underestimating how much most people would hate that.

Speaking of Room 6BCF at the convention: There's a guy on an Internet forum who for some reason seems to live to piss on everything everyone does. A lady posted that she loved the Cartoon Voices panel I moderated on Saturday in that hall and that the place was "packed." The pisser — who I don't think was even there — responded that it wasn't; that there were loads of empty seats. One of our panelists, superstar voice actor Neil Ross, took this photo from the stage just before we started. If this isn't packed, I don't want to be in a room that is…

And remind me: I still have to tell the story about what happened on that panel with Amber Jones, AKA "Amber the Fangirl." You may be able to spot her and her father in the second row in that photo. She's the one grinning and holding up two fingers.

While I'm at it: Some other "I love to complain" person — I think on Facebook — complained about the presentation of the Bill Finger Award at the Friday night award ceremony.  They were irate that when Athena Finger (granddaughter of Bill) and I presented, I didn't give Athena the opportunity to say anything.  There are two things wrong with this complaint, one being that I opted out of making the presentation this year because my injured foot didn't allow me to make it over to the hotel where the trophies were being handed out.

I prevailed on my friend (and a fellow Finger Award judge) Charlie Kochman to take my place and I handed him the speech I'd prepared which clearly indicated a place where Athena could have made whatever remarks she wanted to make if she wanted to make any remarks.  Before the presentation, Charlie asked her and she declined…and I just called her to verify that.  Some people just want to find things to criticize.

And there's nothing wrong with that if/when you know what you're talking about…but you don't have to be too eager.  I have a lot of e-mails here asking me to elaborate further and write about the controversy engendered by formal Marvel Comics editor-in-chief Roy Thomas claiming a co-creator credit for the character Wolverine.  I said what I had to say in a series of posts that began with this one and I had a civil exchange of e-mails with Roy about it that ended with us remaining friends but agreeing to disagree.

Let's find something we can all agree on, huh? I'll try this: "Simone Biles is awesome." Anyone want to fight over that?

Here are two more numbers from Guys and Dolls but neither is the one you're sick of. First is "The Oldest Established," which is sung near the top of the show by all the gamblers including Nathan Detroit, played here by Nathan Lane in the 1992 Broadway revival directed by Jerry Zaks. I saw this production and it was really good. In fact, years later I saw a touring company of it in Las Vegas with Frank Gorshin (!) as Nathan Detroit and Jack Jones (!!) as Sky Masterson and it was still really good, although Nathan Detroit kept lapsing into impressions.

In this video, you may also recognize the gent in the purple suit playing Benny Southstreet. That's J.K. Simmons.

Here's the thing about Guys and Dolls that some of you may not know. When the show was first being assembled in 1950, the first actor signed — before the script and songs were even completed — was Sam Levene as Nathan Detroit. Mr. Levene was then a huge star on Broadway and it was a major coup to get him…though they soon found there was one big problem: He couldn't sing. Quite a few musical numbers were written for his character and quite a few musical numbers were then either dropped or reassigned to other characters because Levene couldn't perform them.

They were still glad to have him because he was (reportedly) very funny in the role — so much so that when Levene finally left the show, Abe Burrows — who wrote the book — found it necessary to add some more jokes to Detroit's part to compensate. But Levene wound up with only one number in the show when it premiered — "Sue Me." For the other numbers he was in, like this one, he was given no solo lines and was ordered to mouth the words but not sing.

Over the years, people who could sing have played the part — Frank Sinatra in the movie, of course — and they're given a little more to vocalize. Here, Nathan Lane gets to sing a bit of "The Oldest Established." Sometimes, Mr. Detroit is added in inappropriately when they sing the title song. Sometimes, a stage production will include "Adelaide," a song written by composer Frank Loesser for the movie. But it can be a frustrating role for someone who can sing. I was told by a performer in that Las Vegas production that when Frank Gorshin was approached, he initially refused to sign unless Nathan Detroit was given the "Sit Down, You're Rockin' the Boat" number but signed anyway when the producers refused.

Here's our first number from that 1992 revival…

And now here from the recording session for the cast album, Nathan Lane sings "Sue Me" with Faith Price, who played Adelaide. And you'll see a little of Jerry Zaks, the director…

My longtime friend Shelly Goldstein — oft-mentioned on this blog — released this letter today…

Aug 1, 2024
To: AMPAS
From: Shelly Goldstein
Re: 2025 Academy Awards Host: GET BRUCE!

Dear Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences,

This week it's been announced that both Jimmy Kimmel and John Mulaney turned down your offer to host the 97th Academy Awards on Sunday, March 2, 2025.

Each is a superb comic performer and an excellent choice. I know the topic of "who should host" is an eternal controversy, comparable to such long-standing debates as "Thin Crust vs. Deep Dish," "Over Hiatus, Which Real Housewife Had the Most Work Done" and "Should Ikea Take Out a Restraining Order Against JD Vance?"

I can solve your problem in 2 words: Get Bruce.  As in comedy legend, Broadway & TV star, beloved Hollywood Square, and all-purpose mensch, Bruce Vilanch.

His very name is synonymous with "Funny" and "Academy Awards." From 2000 to 2014 he was the head writer of the Oscars, having spent the previous 10 years on its writing staff. (Thanks & applause to all the writers he's worked with on the show.)  We're talking the years people remember with joy: the Oscars hosted by Billy Crystal, Whoopi Goldberg, Steve Martin, Ellen DeGeneres, Hugh Jackman — with all due respect to each artists' supreme comic chops, having the best comedy mind in the business feeding them the funny made their appearances soar.

Imagine how brilliant the opening monologue will be, if it's Bruce center stage.

And while he's brilliantly written for the Academy Awards, he's also written the Tonys, Grammys and Emmys. Not to mention his legendary work with the Divine Miss Midler — as well as being on speed dial to virtually every single person in show business who needs to sound funnier and smarter.  It would take up less space to publish a list of the celebs Bruce hasn't written for.

"BUT!" I hear you cry, "A writer isn't necessarily a performer."  Tell that to, I dunno, Steve Martin, Tina Fey, Larry David, Amy Poehler, Stephen Colbert, Albert Brooks, John Cleese, Emma Thompson, Rob Reiner, Nia Vardalos, Key & Peele, Rachel Bloom, Kristen Wiig, Phoebe Waller-Bridge…I could go on but you get the point.

"BUT!" I hear you say…Not enough people know who he is.  Bull pucky!  Bruce has proven himself on TV, on Film, on Broadway. A documentary has been made about his life and unmatched career. Jon Stewart often uses his name and photo to button many a joke. It always gets a huge laugh. He appeared as himself on the Simpson's for God's sake! Bruce's performances can be 3-dimensional in a 2-dimensional medium.

"BUT!" I hear you say…Don't we need to diversify the host?  Yes. Clearly that wasn't an issue for you when you offered the gig to Mssrs. Kimmel and Mulaney. (Each is brilliant. All respect to both of them.)  So yeah, Bruce is a man. If you don't believe me, check out his Grindr profile.  I'm a woman and a comedy writer and I know too well that women are severely overlooked in all aspects of comedy.

Still, there are many varieties of discrimination that need visibility.  Bruce is a proud, respected and beloved gay man who throughout his spectacular career has never hidden who he is from the world. We're talking decades before Ellen came out (Who also did a great job as Oscars host. Guess who wrote for her?)  Having Bruce host would be overwhelmingly pleasing to millions in your core audience — gay, straight, all points in-between and Lindsay Graham.

As for "diversity" — despite all the talk there is one group that is invariably ignored by the Academy, not to mention most of show business, onscreen and behind the scenes — anyone over 50. The industry shoves us so deeply into the ageism closet, we have a better chance finding work as a garment bag.

I've noticed for far too-many years the only time we're guaranteed to see "those of a certain age" on the Academy Awards is during the In Memoriam reel.  The only job where Bruce's age should remove him from consideration is Matt Gaetz's prom date.

But when all is said and done, there's one definitive argument: Bruce would be fantabulous.  To those that say the Oscars need a current host who embodies Hollywood, as did Johnny Carson and Bob Hope…

Bruce personifies Hollywood history. Hell, he helped create much of it.  He's brilliant enough, and funny enough to respect the assignment while knowing exactly how far to go (and when needed, a scooch, farther.)  It will be a way for him to apologize to Hollywood for the whole Rob Lowe/Snow White thing. (You don't remember? You're the lucky one.)

No one would ever dare slap him. He'd be the one slapping the show out of any unnecessary ennui.

Let's be honest. Within a year, I'm sure A.I. will somehow find a way to have the Academy Awards hosted simultaneously by Robin Williams, Marilyn Monroe and Jar Jar Binks — so before our A.I. overlords fully take the reins, let's give the gig to an actual human being.  Who, speaking from personal experience, is one of the best.  In a bitter election year, this is one choice we all can agree on.

Get Bruce!  It'll be historic and hilarious. Thank you from someone who's watched the show faithfully every year since I was 5.

Sincerely,
Shelly Goldstein

To the extent Politics is a Spectator Sport, I currently enjoy watching Pete Buttigieg…who seems to be everywhere. He's smart, he's informed, he's real good at seeming reasonable and debunking false info. One suspects he won't be the running mate of Kamala Harris because a non-white woman and a gay man would cause a lot of MAGAheads who were losing enthusiasm for Trump to race back to his corner. We'd also be in for an awful lot of "butt" jokes.

Still, the guy is tireless and well-spoken and…well, look at him on recently with Jon Stewart. Look at him with Bill Maher. Look at him on Fox News. I haven't seen a lot of political figures of either party who talk this well.

I continue to believe that we're still in for a lot of game-changing moments in this election. There's something very calming to me about Mayor Pete. He reminds me that there are grown-ups in politics.

There have been more reports of folks who attended Comic-Con getting COVID but I've been testing every day and this morning was my fourth negative test. I'll give it two more before I declare myself unscathed by the experience. If I did escape it, it may be because of one or all of the following reasons…

1. I wore a good N95 mask when feeling crowded (this kind)
2. I had a booster shot of Moderna on 7/8/24, two weeks before the convention
3. I didn't venture into the main exhibit hall
4. Dumb luck?

It may be indicative of something that the price of those masks has come way, way down since the height of The Pandemic.  Every doctor I've visited while wearing one in the past few years has complimented me on my selection.

Meanwhile, we have reports of another kind of disease at Comic-Con…

Fourteen people were arrested and 10 victims of sex trafficking were rescued — including a 16-year-old girl — in a sting operation at the Comic-Con International convention in San Diego, California, last week, officials said Thursday.

If you read the reports, it's clear that Comic-Con itself was in no way involved or responsible. It's just the kind of operation that thrives on events that attract people in certain age groups. It was probably way more prevalent in San Diego back when it was more of a "Navy town" than it is these days. We don't have (or need) many more details than that.

A friend at the con also told me that there was a legal brothel just over the border in Tijuana that was advertising special discounts if you showed them your Comic-Con badge. Mine said "Invited Guest" on it so I wonder what I could have gotten down there — apart from something much worse than COVID.

In 1974, there was an attempt to turn the content of MAD magazine into a weekly (I guess) TV series. Some online sources say it was done for ABC and some say it was for NBC but the show, as you'll see if you dare click, has a spot in the opening to insert the name of a sponsor and that would suggest syndication. Whatever the market for it was, it wasn't buying and the sorta-official explanation was that no one wanted to sponsor a show that made fun of advertisers.

My suspicion is that nobody who might have bought it thought it was a very good show. It's kinda impersonal with no host, the music doesn't grab your attention and the laughter on the show feels excessively canned and phony. But it is kind of a curiosity and one of the things I'm curious about is where it was done. MAD was based in New York and the voice cast is all New Yorkers. Some of the artists credited with adapting the material from MAD — Gray Morrow for one — were based in New York but most of the animators seem to be Los Angeles people.

Most of the folks at MAD who I asked about it didn't know much. Larry Siegel, one of MAD's best writers, seemed pretty angry about it. In '74, Larry was a pretty successful writer of TV comedy — he had a few Emmys for The Carol Burnett Show — and didn't like the idea that material he'd written for the magazine was being repurposed for TV without him getting paid more.

I would guess all the MAD writers whose material was or would be used felt the same way and so did some or all of the MAD artists.

Mediocre video copies of the show have been circulating for some time but my buddy Douglass Abramson alerted me to this really good copy on YouTube. Watch as much of it as you can stand…

I traveled to and from San Diego with my longtime friend Bob Ingersoll at the wheel. On the way down, we stopped off for lunch at Sonny's, a friendly red sauce Italian restaurant in San Clemente. It ain't fancy but it also ain't expensive and the pasta is good. I've plugged it here before.

On the way back, we decided to give Raising Cane's a try for lunch. Neither of us had ever been to one but I've seen people rave and rave about the fried chicken tenders that just about comprise the entire menu. My reaction? They were good but I think I was oversold in advance. I didn't think they were any better than a half-dozen places (including KFC) where I've had similar tenders/fingers and I didn't like the Cane's sauce about which so many rave. The best thing was that the "3-Finger Combo" — my meal of choice — comes without cole slaw.

Well, actually it was the best meal I had that day. What I ate for dinner gave me food poisoning.

This is the last "Sit Down, You're Rockin' the Boat" post, at least for a little while. I received a few complaints about the repetition and one very outraged one from a guy who insisted the name of the song is "Sit Down, You're Rocking the Boat" with a "G." Yes, people sometimes write it that way but the original sheet music spelled it with an apostrophe so that's good enough for me.

I decided to close this run with the number as performed in the movie…with Stubby Kaye belting out the number as it (reportedly) never failed to stop the show on Broadway. Looking at all the ways it's been staged since tells us something about how the theater has evolved. It's no longer acceptable to just sing it. You have to orchestrate the hell out of it and have dynamic choreography. It's that way with just about every revival but I kinda like the way it's performed here.

Fans of The Dick Van Dyke Show may recognize the famed gangster Big Max Calvada among the mugs being "saved" at the mission. This was from back when he went under the name of Harry the Horse and before that, he was a bartender named Nick visible in It's a Wonderful Life.

But now, here's Stubby showing that you don't always gotta get a gimmick…

Sorry I disappeared on you folks…and no, as a couple of e-mails surmised, I did not come down with COVID. There have been reports of many cases emerging from Comic-Con but so far, I'm not one of them, at least according to my home tests. What I did come down with was food poisoning — something I ate Monday evening — perhaps exacerbated by my many food allergies. It came upon me in the wee small hours of Tuesday morning and, yes, my first thought was "Is this COVID?" But I soon recognized the symptoms and I did a test and I'm sure it was food poisoning.

Due to some combination of that and convention fatigue, I slept most of yesterday and now I'm back. I think. I'll continue to rest for a while and to test for a while.

Overall, I had a very good time in San Diego and I'm enormously grateful to those who helped me out and around, particularly the Guest Relations Team at Comic-Con and particularly a wonderful human being named Brendan Goggins who pushed me around in a wheelchair for four days, aided by other G.R.T. members. I could walk at times but with Brendan and his team members, I got to all my panels on time and with a minimum of stress on my left foot.

My favorite panels? Hard to say. I enjoyed the ones — like the 70's panel (above) with Gerry Conway, Jo Duffy, Marv Wolfman, Al Milgrom and Mike Friedrich about working in comics during that decade. As I explained here, I'm f'ing sick of people complaining that Comic-Con doesn't have programming that's about comic books.

Quick Draw! was great with Scott Shaw!, Lalo Alcaraz, Floyd Norman and guest cartoonists Tom Richmond, Emma Steinkellner and Bill Morrison — with a special appearance (via telephone) by Sergio Aragonés. Both Cartoon Voices panels were sensational, not because of the moderator but because of the extremely talented people on those panels. I'll tell you a fun story about the Saturday Cartoon Voices panel soon.

Really, I enjoyed every minute of the con except when my foot was hurting — and even that did not make me regret attending. That was the 53rd Comic-Con International and my 53rd. I've never regretted going to any of them. More on the con when I'm more awake.

Here's Episode 5 of the 1978 Laugh-In revival with Robin Williams, Sergio Aragonés and a lot of funny folks who aren't well-remembered but some maybe oughta be…