Sergio and I talk about the current Groo mini-series and about the wonderful colorist who has joined the Groo Crew…
ASK me: Gleason on The Tonight Show
Yesterday, I posted this video link to Jackie Gleason's one-and-only appearance on The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson. Jim Held wants to know…
Any take on why this was the only time Gleason appeared on The Tonight Show?
Did he have something he really wanted to plug and his handlers/producers just thought that Tonight was the place to do it? Did Gleason feel he wasn't treated with the massive deference he thought he deserved? Or did Carson and his handlers just think Jackie was a pain in the butt and not worth dealing with any more?
No, I think this is all easily explainable as a matter of geography. Mr. Gleason moved his TV show and residence to Florida in 1964, less than two years after Johnny Carson took over The Tonight Show. He was probably not on before that move because he was a CBS star and Carson was on NBC and back then, the networks really frowned on having on guests who top-lined shows on a competing channel.
It happened but it didn't happen often. When you watch old talk shows, you'll often see someone mention that they have a show on "another network" as if it's a curse word to say that network's name. By the time that went out of fashion, Gleason was happily a resident in Florida and he rarely left. He didn't like to fly and usually when he did, it was because he was being paid a lot of money to appear in some big movie. You'll notice in the video, he mentions he was in town shooting a film with Tom Hanks.
He popped up occasionally on TV shows shot in New York or Hollywood but very rarely. One of the rare times was on this 1968 episode of Here's Lucy which also featured Jack Benny. Earlier in '68, Gleason was in L.A. to shoot his scenes in Skidoo and then How to Commit Marriage, back-to-back. I don't know where How to Commit Marriage was filmed but a lot of Skidoo was shot at Paramount and so was Here's Lucy. Maybe Lucy's producers just heard he was on the lot and wrote him into the script…
(By the way: The gent playing the tour guide in that clip is the legendary Sid Gould, who worked with everyone but especially Lucy.)
I doubt Gleason didn't want to appear on Mr. Carson's show and I doubt Johnny didn't want him. It was probably an inability to coordinate Jackie's schedule with whatever he was in town to do.
ASK me: Tiered Pricing
Steven Deal wrote to ask…
Hi, Just curious if you have given any thought to the recent announcement from AMC theaters regarding tiered pricing?
No. Not really. My moviegoing is very rare these days and I almost never go to AMC theaters. What I have thought about is how the current trend in American business seems to be to see how much they can raise prices before it becomes cost-ineffective. Las Vegas is currently a good example of this. I'm sure the price increases there on hotel rooms, restaurants, shows, tourist attractions (etc.) are driving some tourists away but apparently not in sufficient number to cause them to stop. The shows still sell out. The buffets still have long lines. And so on.
Every large business these days seems to have a division that is in charge of determining how much more money they can charge for what they offer…and who can blame them? If you could make more money by charging more for whatever you sell or do, why wouldn't you charge more? Someone at AMC obviously decided this was worth a try.
They probably said, "Hey, people will pay more for good seats at concerts, plays and other live shows. Maybe they'll pay it for movies." If it doesn't work, it should be a small matter to roll back prices or, more likely, keep those prices higher but make discount coupons more available. That's what Vegas does. They don't lower prices. They just offer discounts judiciously. Some people would be happier getting a 50% off ticket to a show than to have that show cost half as much in the first place.
I see two potential problems to the AMC plan. One is that people don't all agree on the ideal place to sit in a movie theater. At a live show, as close to the stage as possible is usually best unless it's an act that smashes watermelons or something. At a movie, some people like to be farther back. Some like dead center. I used to go out with a lady who didn't care where we sat as long as there was no one in front of us and no stranger next to her. I like an aisle seat where my right leg can extend out when it doesn't inconvenience anyone else.
The other possible problem: At a showing where the theater is half-empty, what's to stop people in the cheapest seats from just moving down to the expensive ones once the movie starts? Is the theater really going to have an employee watching for this and send someone out to make someone move? Sounds disruptive to the other patrons. My guess is that many of the theater's staffers would just look the other way.
But hey, who knows? Maybe AMC can make this work. I doubt though they'll be getting much of my money either way.
Miracle Whip
If you've been to any Disney theme park, you've probably had Dole Whip…usually the pineapple kind, though they make it in many flavors. I know people for whom no trip to a Magic Kingdom is complete without a Dole Whip. I gave up dessert-type foods many years ago but before I did, I loved Dole Whip and I especially loved the orange variety.
Wanna make it at home? There are dozens of YouTube videos by people who tell you how to make it using various combinations of frozen pineapple, ice cream, milk, sweetened condensed milk or other ingredients. And the Dole company once released this recipe which uses frozen pineapple, a banana, powdered sugar, coconut milk and lime juice. Which one will taste just like the Dole Whip you got at Disneyland?
Answer: None of them. The pineapple Dole Whip at Disneyland is made from a mix and here's the ingredients list: Sugar, Dextrose, Maltodextrin, Coconut Oil, Citric Acid, Contains 2% Or Less Of Each Of The Following: Color (Carrot Concentrate, Blackcurrant Concentrate), Ascorbic Acid, Stabilizers (Guar Gum, Cellulose Gum, Xanthan Gum), Natural Flavor, Modified Food Starch, Mono & Diglycerides, Silicon Dioxide (Anticaking).
So if you want your homemade Dole Whip to taste like the one at the theme park, you need to get all that stuff…or maybe it would be easier to buy the mix and a home ice cream maker. Apparently, back when I used to eat it, it wasn't dairy-free as it is now.
Today's Video Link
From 10/18/1985: Jackie Gleason makes his first and only appearance on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson. It's a great conversation but Mr. Gleason gets a little confused about The Honeymooners. He started being Ralph Kramden on Cavalcade of Stars, a live series he starred in on the DuMont Television Network in 1950 and 1951. In 1952, he jumped to CBS for higher pay and a program called The Jackie Gleason Show on which more "Honeymooners" sketches appeared.
That was an hour-long variety show. In 1955, Gleason insisted on suspending that series and instead made the 39 classic half-hour episodes of The Honeymooners and then the following year, he went back to the hour format. It went on and off CBS a couple times before it ended for good in 1970. Ralph Kramden and Ed Norton appeared now and then on all those shows.
Here he is with Johnny in 1985…
ASK me: Avoiding Sports
Just before the Super Bowl, I wrote here about my near-total disinterest in sports. That prompted Robert Rose to write in and ask…
As a follow-up to your note about not being a fan of sports, I don't question that part of it; I'm not much of a sports fan myself, though I think a bit more than you. I do like to attend the occasional baseball game, and I may actually watch the Super Bowl, or part of it, but that's more of a social activity — watching it with friends — than because I care much about the outcome.
But I am curious about your statement that "I still haven't paid enough attention to football to know how it's played." I can understand not following it as an adult, but how did you avoid it as a kid? I'm ten years younger than you, but growing up and going to public schools, I had to participate in P.E. classes, which means I had to learn enough about the rules of sports like baseball, football, basketball, volleyball, and soccer to at least participate, however poorly. I may not know enough to give a coherent explanation of the infield fly rule or to always distinguish between offsides and illegal procedure, but surely enough to follow the basics of what's going on.
I'm just wondering how you avoided this; or did you learn just enough to minimally get by, and promptly forgot it all after graduating from high school?
Well, I don't recall ever playing soccer in high school. What we played of the other sports you mention were simplified, modified versions of the games that were clearly not what professional teams played. Even then, I'm not sure I completely understood the rules but I guess I understood enough to get by. It helps that when you're as lousy at sports as I was, your teammates rarely pass you the ball. I was never a real active player in any of these activities so I could fake it.
In baseball, I remember we had a rule that when you hit the ball, there was a prescribed way to lay down the bat before you ran for first. Neatness in doing that counted in a way it never does in the Major or probably even the Minor Leagues. The one time at bat that I somehow managed to wallop the ball far enough for it to maybe be a home run, Coach Hawkesworth — yes, I remember his name — called me "out" because he didn't like the way I laid down the bat.
And the version of football we played resembled what the teams in the Super Bowl are playing about as much as an Egg McMuffin resembles Eggs Benedict. So you're right: Once I graduated high school, I forgot every bit of my athletic experience except for Coach Hawkesworth robbing me of the only home run of my life.
I was just plain lousy in sports, even back when I was underweight instead of over. I've always been one of the clumsiest people on this planet — the kind who can't cross the street without almost tripping on the white line. One time when I was working on That's Incredible!, Fran Tarkenton tossed me a football from about eight feet away and the ball bounced off my hands, hit me in the nose and then I stumbled picking it up. Fran told me I was the worst catcher-of-footballs he'd ever seen in his life.
Since a lot of people thought he was the best thrower of them ever, I figured he must know what he was talking about. It almost felt like an honor.
Today's Video Link
At last! I've been urging someone to make a YouTube video performing the great parody of the song "Downtown" that the late Frank Jacobs wrote for MAD. My longtime e-mail friend Corey Klemow has picked up the dare/challenge/urging/whatever you want to call it.
I don't think Frank meant for it to refer to the specific restaurant by that name…if said restaurant even existed in 1967 but that's beside the point. You're a good (and brave) man, Corey Klemow…
In The News (What Little of it I Follow)
It should come as a surprise to no one that some of the right-wing folks on Fox News do not believe a lot of what they put on the air. If you're not up on the recent revelations, you might want to read this article by Jeremy Stahl. He focuses on text messages from Tucker Carlson that show Carlson thought a lot of it was rubbish but there are similar e-mails from Hannity, Ingraham and other Fox personalities. It's all coming out because of the lawsuit that the makers of Dominion Voting Machines have brought against Fox News. And it can't help Fox's defense that there's all this evidence that the channel broadcasts news they don't really believe.
That's one of the few things I'm following in the news these days. Another is the way the New York Times and other supposedly-progressive entities are sounding pretty non-progressive (and not all that well-informed) on the topic of Gender Reassignment. Read this article by Christina Cautericci. That is all.
Stella Stevens, R.I.P.
It hasn't been a good week for glamorous actresses of the movies. I didn't write anything about Raquel Welch because I never met her, didn't see very many of her movies and didn't know any great anecdotes about her. I was going to write a little piece about how I admired how she'd gone from being someone who was hired mainly for her looks to someone who distinguished herself as a good actress on film and especially on stage…but then I saw that everyone else was saying that.
I did however meet Stella Stevens…not for long but on several occasions. We seemed to get invited to a lot of the same parties and we talked enough cumulatively for me to see that she was a genuinely nice person who was proud of her work.
At one event, we were talking about Li'l Abner, the 1959 movie in which she played the lovely-but-sneaky Appassionata Von Climax. Ms. Stevens, unlike most of the cast, had not appeared in the musical when it originally played on Broadway but a fellow who overheard our conversation didn't know that. He politely interrupted to introduce himself and tell her that Abner was the first show he ever saw on Broadway and to gush about how much he'd loved her in it.
An easy mistake. But when I started to correct the guy, she gave me a look that said "Let me handle this" and she thanked the fellow and was so sweet in the way she told him "That was probably Tina Louise or Deedee Wood you saw in that role then" that he wasn't the least embarrassed. I don't think I could have done that.
If you look at her IMDB listing, you may be stunned by how many TV shows and movies Stella Stevens was in. And if you read the New York Times obit, you'll see that she had a lot of struggles, including a certain amount of sexism when she tried to move from in front of the camera to the director's chair. That she overcame as many as she did tells you what kind of lady she was. And she chuckled when I congratulated her on surviving working with Jerry Lewis.
As the World Turns – Part 2
Two weeks from now, I turn 71 — an age which, when I was much younger, sounded like the age when you look like Burt Mustin and walk like Tim Conway's old man character. Some days, my knees do cause me to walk like the latter. But except around the knees, I don't feel that old and people who sound reasonably sincere tell me that I look years younger. Well, maybe two.
Something you don't think of until you pass 60 is that the longer you live, the more someone you know dies. You also increasingly see obits for folks who, even if they weren't friends, cause you think, "Gee, he was my age." Or worse, "Gee, he was younger than I am." We don't like things that remind us that we might not have as many years left as we once did.
And I think I've mentioned it before but I have a couple of friends who are getting on in years who can't seem to shut up about how death seems imminent. They might live a few decades more but every sentence out of their mouths lately is about death and dying and how they won't be around much longer. One in particular who passed a couple years back almost seemed to have willed himself into the grave prematurely. My philosophy is that I'll go when I go…and obsessing on it now can only get in the way of living.
So what does this have to do with what I was talking about, which was The Beatles on The Ed Sullivan Show? Just this: I'm really getting tired of people who have trouble with the concept that the world changes and it can't be like it was when you were 24. Or 32. Or whatever age you were when you really liked the music, the movies, the way people dressed, etc. All that stuff's supposed to change and you can't be part of the Target Audience forever.
I ran that old newspaper column the other day here — the one by Paul Jones, who I've been informed by many of you wrote for the Atlanta Constitution. I'm going to assume Mr. Jones was sincere in what he wrote that day and was not doing what some columnists and commentators do: Say something controversial just to get attention. If he didn't really believe what he wrote, others certainly did.
It's an attitude that I find increasingly common in folks my age…and I suspect it's always there when you hit 70 or so. It's that frustration that the world is changing and it doesn't revolve around your generation any longer. There are movies that aren't aimed at you. There are jokes full of references that you don't get. There are hit songs that are huge…but you never heard of the people performing them and what they have to offer isn't the kind of music you loved forty years ago.
Paul Jones wrote, of Ed Sullivan presenting the Beatles on his show…
In catering to the screaming teen-agers who find this group exciting, Sullivan has shown his contempt for the vast millions who used to find his program diverting.
Okay. That's one way to look at it. Another might be that Ed was getting one of the largest audiences in the history of television and extending the life of a TV series that had already been on the air for sixteen years. And it stayed on for another eight by booking acts like that, including The Beatles a few more times.
To the columnist from the Atlanta Constitution, it was showing contempt for the viewers. To others, it was staying relevant to changing times and giving the public what much of it wanted. Does anyone think that Ed would have stayed on the air for eight more years if instead of The Beatles, he'd booked Jerry Vale?
TO BE CONTINUED SOME MORE
Today's Video Link
I don't watch The Masked Singer often. Too often when the mystery vocalist is unmasked, I have no idea who they are. But sometimes, it's someone I've heard of and it's fun to tune in and see the unmasking. That was the case with The Gnome, a character on the show's season opener this past week.
If by some chance you haven't heard who it was, watch a little of the musical performance and see if you can guess…
Then if you want to see the unmasking, go to this link. I'd embed it here but the thumbnail image would give it away. It's a very nice moment.
Things I'll Never Understand
I was just placing an online order for groceries and I found these on the same page. Can no one in this world do math anymore?
Mask and Ye Shall Receive
A lot of people have sent me links to articles that say mask-wearing has been very effective against COVID and others have sent me to studies that say otherwise. I'm still sticking with the conclusion that it ain't settled yet and that no study has really proved anything. James Troutman sent me to this article that says pretty much that.
Today's Video Link
Folks wrote to ask me why, when I was writing about The Beatles on The Ed Sullivan Show, I didn't link to a video clip of it. That's because the outfit that has the rights to Ed's show and posts clips on YouTube hasn't posted that material. Others have but they haven't so I decided not to. But here's an ad they did post for selling those shows on DVD. I'm sure a lot of people are buying it just for the Soupy Sales appearance. Me, I just wanted to see Charlie Brill and Mitzi McCall…
As The World Turns – Part 1
On February 9, 1964 when John, Paul, George and Ringo first appeared on The Ed Sullivan Show, I was 11 years, 11 months and 7 days old. I didn't think of it in these terms then but now, I think it was the second time in my life I witnessed the world around me changing. The first, of course, had occurred just eighty days earlier: The assassination of President John F. Kennedy.
The Coming of The Beatles was, of course, not such a tragic jolt and no one at the time — but no one — imagined how important those four lads and their kind of music would become to the world. It wasn't just surly adults like that columnist I quoted who didn't then see the significance of it all. It was everyone.
I remember feeling indifferent to the whole matter. I watched Ed's show that Sunday night and thought, first of all, that those teen girls in the audience screaming looked ridiculous. I also thought the way the show had cut to them was intended to make them look even more ridiculous. Someone on Ed's staff (maybe even Ed) thought the "show" was not those four boys with the then-freaky haircuts. It was the way those girls in the audience reacted.
But to me, it was all a big "So what?" The music itself was fine but unremarkable. None of us knew how much better they'd get and how their music would be so tethered to what was happening here, there and everywhere for years to come.
At Emerson Junior High the next day, there was some talk about The Fab Four but not a lot. There was a girl I sat next to in some classes named Marnie who was quite ga-ga over the whole Beatles thing. She was unable to talk about much else except them their music, their outfits and which one of them she'd marry.
I think she finally set her sights on Ringo, not because she liked him best but because he seemed the neediest. Being way too logical for my age, I told her that, given the way record sales were going, not one of those four gents was ever going to be needy. She gave me an annoyed look and explained: "No fan of rock and roll ever chooses to sleep with the drummer." This was a thirteen-year-old girl telling me this.
Beatlemania did not sweep totally over the Emerson Campus but one day a few weeks later, amazing posters began appearing around the school. A group called The Girls' League occasionally staged events in the gym during lunchtime. It cost a quarter to get in and you could sit in there and eat your lunch while taking in a half-hour show, all proceeds going to charity. They'd had a folk singer there and before him, a classical violinist. I think between the two mini-concerts, they'd taken in about nine dollars.
But it looked like they'd shatter that record with the next show in the gym: That Friday, The Beatles would be performing. That's right. I said, "The Beatles."
I cannot tell you why anyone for one second thought it was even a skillion-to-one possibility. Not only were The Beatles not anywhere near Los Angeles but they usually didn't play in junior high gymnasiums for twenty-five cents admission. It couldn't possibly be them…absolutely positively couldn't possibly be them. Still, as the week wore on, it felt like whoever was performing there wouldn't be playing to empty seats. As my friend Kerry put it, "No, I'm sure it won't be the real Beatles…
"…but suppose, just suppose it is. Think how foolish you'd feel if you missed out your chance to see them perform live. And for a quarter!" Marnie was definitely going and she hinted that she had inside information that it actually would be John, Paul, George and that drummer no one wanted to sleep with. She seemed wired into the new-but-growing-rapidly Beatles Fan Network and I heard several students say, "Marnie sounds like she knows something."
When the lunch bell rang that Friday, a mob of students stampeded for the gym, quarters at the ready. I wanted to go just to see what the show would consist of but since I stopped at my locker to get my lunch, I got there too late. It was sold out. A lot of kids didn't get in and I was standing with several of them as we experienced a moment — just one brief over-in-two-seconds moment of total unreality. From inside, we could hear the sound of The Beatles — the real Beatles — playing "She Loves You," complete with all the yeah-yeahs.
But after those two seconds of shock, I announced, "It's the record" and everyone else who was jerked back to sanity said, "Of course! I recognized it right away!" A few students from inside who'd apparently thought it was really going to be The Beatles, walked out grumbling. One of them told us, "It's four girls in black suits and Beatle wigs. They have these old, beat-up guitars and a kid's drum set and they're just pretending to be The Beatles and mouthing the words to the record." Like it could have been anything else.
I felt bad for Marnie, thinking how disappointed she had to be…but later, I found out that she was not crushed. Quite the contrary, she was the one who had organized the concert…organized it and she was the one portraying Paul McCartney.
TO BE CONTINUED