So now Will Smith's got us talking about hitting people. I am against hitting people. I probably said somewhere on this blog that I only did that once in my life but then I later thought of one other time. In both instances, I was in my teens so both were over a half century ago. In neither case was the person I struck injured. At worst, I caused them a bit of pain for a minute or two.
In both times, I was congratulated by others who were present and they said things like, "It's about time someone took a swing at that asshole." In neither case was I punished in any way. In both cases, the person I struck later apologized for their behavior and more or less said they deserved it.
Nevertheless: In both cases, I was ashamed of what I did. I suppose I can imagine situations where striking another person is warranted but it certainly wasn't in these cases. In both matters, I felt something had to be done in response to their bad behavior and the shame I felt had a lot to do with the fact that I couldn't think of something else to do. I hit out of frustration that I didn't have a better idea.
In the last fifty years, I've had people misbehave just as badly or worse in my presence but I haven't even thought of hitting them. I'd like to think that's because I've thought of better ways to deal with those situations. Among the options are to retaliate verbally…and sometimes, you can even explain your feelings to the other party in a way they understand and they'll stop.
Not letting them bother me has probably worked out best…and by "best," I mean "best for me."