I haven't mentioned it lately but I continue to get 2-3 phone calls a day from cold callers — people who hope to earn a commission on any construction work I have done (or solar panels I have installed) as a result of them phoning me. Once in a while, I hear from someone who I think is an actual contractor himself but mostly they seem to be kids with scripts, often this script…
Good afternoon, Mr. Evanier. This is [Name] with [Name of Construction Company]. I spoke to you a few months ago about possible work on your home on [Street Name] and you were very nice to me but you were not ready then to start on the work just then. You told me to call you back around now and my firm is ready to come out and give you that free estimate you wanted.
At this point, I either call them a liar or I lie to them in response. I tell them that house burned down or that they promised to call me back last month and since they didn't, I gave all that work to another contractor…or something. Usually, they realize they're wasting their time and just hang up. Once in a while, they try to convince me to just get the estimate. One guy got mad at me when I declined and he said, "You're probably real ugly with no friends!" Now, that's how you make a sale.
At times though, I just feel sorry for these people. No one does these calls if they can get anything else. I figure it's highly likely they got conned themselves, answering some ad that insisted they could make thousands a week from home. I tell some of them (honestly) how many of these calls I get and how if I did want a company I've never heard of who starts our relationship by lying to me to come out and do work on my house, I would have taken up that offer from one of the thirty calls I got last week or the twenty-seven the week before. Some of the callers seem genuinely stunned that I've heard the "you told me to call you back around now" story more often than I've heard my ring-tone.
One caller asked me, "How often have you heard this pitch?" I told him, "Almost as often as you've heard this" and I hung up on him.
Some of you who live in Swing States like Ohio and Florida have written to tell me you sympathize because in an election year, you get hundreds of calls from strangers trying to get you to vote one way or another. We don't get much of that in California. Democrats don't campaign here because they don't need to. Republicans don't because it wouldn't do much good. Once in a while, I get a call about some proposition on the ballot and last election, I got a call from someone calling on behalf of the G.O.P. congressional candidate in my district. He got 40% whereas the Democrat got 60% and I'll bet this year, it won't be much different.
What I'm waiting for is for someone to call to try and get me to vote for the Republican…and then when I say I won't, the caller says, "Well, while I've got you here, I'm also with [Name of Construction Company]. I spoke to you a few months ago about possible work on your home on [Street Name] and you were very nice to me…"