An Honest Liar

It finally happened. As you may know, I get pestered all the time with phone calls from contractors and folks they hire to make "cold calls" to a list of homeowners. Often, they start these calls by lying. "Mr. Evanier," they say, "we spoke last August about some work you wanted to have done on your house and you asked me to call you back around now so we could discuss coming out to give you an estimate."

I got one of these the other day and I did what I usually do. I told him he was lying and if I did need work done on my home — I don't — I wouldn't hire someone who started off by lying to me.

Usually, that ends the call but this time, the fellow on the phone said to me, "Uh, now that I'm done with the sales pitch, could I ask you something?" Curious what it might be, I said yes.

He said, "Are you the Mark Evanier who writes comic books and cartoons?"

For a second, I thought a sly salesguy had Googled my name…but no. When I told him I was, he told me enough things to convince me he really knew who I was and liked my work. That never doesn't not surprise me. I finally told him, "Well, I'm flattered and now I wish I had some work to do on my house."

But of course, neither of those things is true. The guy is, after all, a liar.