- I made a $100 trillion dollar platinum coin to fix the economy. Accidentally put it in a parking meter so I'm making another one. 10:03:35
- Made another $100 trillion dollar platinum coin. Impulsively left it as a tip for a corned beef sandwich at Canter's Delicatessen. 15:34:14
- Making more $100 trillion dollar platinum coins. You know whose picture is on the $100 trillion dollar platinum coin? Merv Griffin. 16:13:52
- Another great thing about those $100 trillion dollar platinum coins: When you peel off the platinum foil, there's chocolate inside. 19:43:05
- The $100 trillion dollar platinum coin doesn't say "In God We Trust" on it. It says "My God, We Trust." 22:18:51