As we all know, Pat Robertson is in the news again for saying something stupid and insulting. Question: When is Pat Robertson in the news without saying something stupid and insulting? Would we even know this guy exists if he didn't say something stupid and insulting every few months?
Is it possible that it's all just a "notice me" thing? Someone runs into Robertson's office and says, "Pat! We just did a Nexis search and it seems you haven't been mentioned in any of the major news outlets for six months."
Pat says, "Oh, can't have that. I'd better go out and say something stupid and insulting. Have you got anything?"
And the other guy pulls out some papers and says, "I had the boys draw up some suggestions. The ones marked in red are the ones we're sure will get you in every late night monologue on television."
Pat scans the list. "Hmm…this one about Jews having big noses isn't bad. The one about God smiting Ted Kennedy by enlarging his head is good but it needs more work. And what's this one about Him destroying the NBC prime-time line-up because some of their shows are too permissive? I did something very much like that with Hurricane Katrina."
How about something like…this is just off the top of my head…Ariel Sharon's illness being caused by dividing the Holy Land? No, wait. That's too nasty…"
"Hold on," Pat says. "I think you may be on to something."