Today's Video Link

Like everyone else, you've probably wondering what would have resulted if instead of writing and starring in Hamilton, Lin-Manuel Miranda and the rest of that cast had instead done Sweeney Todd. Well, we need not wonder any longer. This past April, the cast of Hamilton opened the 30th Annual Easter Bonnet Competition with their interpretation of the classic tale of the Demon Barber of Fleet Street.

The Easter Bonnet Competition of one of many fund-raising events staged each year by Broadway Cares/Equity Fights AIDS, one of the nation's leading nonprofit fundraising and grant-making organizations. A few days from now, they'll be presenting their annual Gypsy of the Year shows in New York and I sure wish I could be there for one of them. They always feature several things as clever and creative as this…

Recommended Reading

Much of the Trump ascendancy was built on preaching against illegal immigrants, especially illegal immigrants who take jobs from real Americans. The facts say those numbers are low but facts don't matter a lot these days, especially to people who are afraid of foreigners or who aren't working and like that as a reason. Personally, I don't care that much about "the illegals" and I cringe at the racism that is sometimes expressed against both legal and illegal immigrants.

If I did think it was vital to purge our population of illegal aliens…well, there's an easy way to do it that would be more effective than building a wall or sending a lot of armed guys who think they're Chuck Norris to guard the border. You create an efficient way — unlike the current one, which is easy to work around — to verify that someone is in this country legally. Then you require employers to use that method and verify legal status, plus — and you have to do this part — you impose stiff fines and even jail time for employers who don't verify.

You do that, illegals can't get jobs in this country. And if they can't get jobs in this country, they'll go to some other country or don't come here in the first place. Simple as it could be.

But as Wayne Cornelius notes, Republicans don't want to do that. Much of their base demands they do something about the illegals but Republican leadership isn't about pleasing its base. It's about pleasing rich people, corporate owners and employers — and those people like illegal aliens because they work cheap.

Also, those people don't want to be slapped with stiff fines or face jail. As Cornelius notes, employers who do hire illegals face less than a microscopic chance of being caught under the current system and if they are caught, the penalties are mild.

Let's see what Mr. Trump will do to change this…but I kinda doubt we'll wind up with anything that would ever cause any Trump business — most of which have employed illegals — to have ever faced fines or jail. They also won't threaten fines or jail against the businesses that hired Mrs. Trump when she worked without the proper work visa.

12/08

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12/08/80 was the day John Lennon was murdered outside his New York apartment. There are a lot of ugly events that jolted the world but that one hit very hard. It's surprising I guess that someone waited this long to do a movie about that day but someone has. The Lennon Report is a docudrama about it and I'm going to be seeing it on 12/08/16 at the Los Angeles premiere. According to the press release, "Red carpet and musical guests are scheduled prior to the screening and director Jeremy Profe will take questions after the film along with Karen Tsen Lee who plays Yoko Ono."

It's at the Crest Theater in Westwood, a place where I saw movies as a child but I haven't been inside since around 1975. I hear it's changed. The press release also says…

The Crest is a unique combination of historical charm and modern performance technology and capabilities. Commissioned by Francis Seymour Fonda in 1940, the 460 seat theater houses a single movie screen with the ability to show 35 and 75mm films, a 4K digital projector, Dolby Digital sound, and an entertainment stage for live shows. In 2008, the Los Angeles Cultural Heritage Commission voted unanimously to recommend the theater as a City of Los Angeles Historic-Cultural Monument. The theater is gearing up to present a compelling mix of programming to the Los Angeles community in 2017 and invites programmers to creatively use the space.

So I'm interested to see the movie and the movie theater. You may be able to score tickets for the premiere at the Crest's website.

Roll Reversal

Dozens of people sent me e-mails about my post which said — tongue planted firmly in cheek — that toilet paper should always come off the front of the roll, not the back. One of them, Doug Edwards, came up with the clever subject line above so I'm running his e-mail here. They all said pretty much the same thing…

There's a very simple, practical reason for having the leading edge of the toilet paper hanging from the back instead of the front, at least for those with toddler children and/or pets: it keeps the toilet paper on the roll in the event of pawing, swatting, or other (typically downward) gestures that would otherwise unroll the TP onto the floor.

At least some of us who've come into a bathroom to discover such unrolled toilet paper would rather not re-experience that grief, and thus indulge ourselves in an apparently patent-violating roll reversal. But believe me on this: the reason is practical, not esthetic or general contrariness.

As many surmised, I don't have cat in my home or, for that matter, a child. (I do still feed feral cats in my backyard.) Okay, fine. Whatever. It's not like I was about to pass a law as to how you had to put your toilet paper in the holder. Donald Trump probably is but I'm not.

Recommended Reading

Matt Taibbi interviews Bernie Sanders on where we go from here. I'm impressed with most of Bernie's goals but he doesn't seem to have much of an idea right now as to how to achieve them.

Today on Stu's Show!

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I keep forgetting to plug what's on Stu's Show. Tomorrow, Stu has on my good buddy Michael Schlesinger, one of the great authorities on motion pictures and, in his past life as an exec for what is now Sony Pictures. Mike's a guy who saved many great films from disappearing forever and caused others to be released on home video. He hosts film festivals and creates the wonderful Biffle & Shooster comedies I've mentioned here before and he does all sorts of neat things. If you're a Godzilla fan, you'll especially want to hear about his involvement with some of those films. If you aren't a Godzilla fan, listen in anyway because you'll learn a lot about the movie biz and film history.

Stu's Show can be heard live (almost) every Wednesday at the Stu's Show website and you can listen for free there and then. Webcasts start at 4 PM Pacific Time, 7 PM Eastern and other times in other climes. They run a minimum of two hours and sometimes go to three or beyond. Then shortly after a show concludes, it's available for downloading from the Archives on that site. Downloads are a paltry 99 cents each and you can get four for the price of three, which is always nice. I've had one knee replacement. If I ever need to have the other knee done, I'm going to pay for one more so I can get four for the price of three.

Roll Model

This is important enough for me to interrupt the script I have to finish today and come back here to post it.  As all of you are aware I'm sure, it matters a lot which way the toilet paper comes off the roll.  It should hang off the front (as in the photo at left below) not the rear (as in the photo at right).

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As I wrote back here, I once did a show with Jerry Lewis and we were warned that he would walk out on the taping if the john in his dressing room had an incorrectly-mounted roll of toilet  paper.  I do not think the person who told me this was kidding.

In this world, there is no fact or truth so universally accepted that someone won't insist on the opposite.  Well, we have now have proof — or at least as much as we're ever going to get — that the front overhang is the correct configuration. Writer Owen Williams dug up the 1891 patent for perforated toilet paper and the device that holds it. It clearly shows how it was supposed to work.

I can't think of any reason to have it hang down the back unless it's that you want to get Jerry Lewis out of the building. Then again, that might be a great reason.

My Two New Political Pet Peeves

I'm sure I'll have more before long but these will do for now…

  1. People who hated Barack Obama, spread the idea that he really wasn't President because he was a Kenyan (i.e., not a white guy) and prayed for the Congress to block every single thing he did just because he was the one doing it…and now say that for the good of America, we've all got to forget everything Trump said and did during the campaign, come together and root for him to succeed. I could and would get behind most of that if they'd done it for Obama and also if their idea of "working together" wasn't to give them every single thing they want.
  2. People who voted and campaigned for Trump, cheered his election and are now starting to say, "They're going to do what to my Medicare (or other health insurance) and Social Security?" Bonus peeve points if they believed, as most Americans do, that Climate Change is a real and present threat but they still celebrated the election of a guy who said it was a hoax engineered by the Chinese. Trump's not going to let anything happen that will lessen that danger until at least three of his golf courses are underwater and several caddies drown.

Meanwhile, I'm going to be mud-wrestling a script deadline for the rest of today and another one tomorrow.  I'll get back here when I can.

Recommended Reading

William Saletan writes a guide on How to Manipulate Donald Trump. Basically, Saletan says, you pat him on the head, tickle him under the chin and tell him he's great. Then he'll do anything you want.

Which would be nice if it were true. The trouble with that is there are other people with opposite goals patting him on the head, tickling him under the chin and telling him he's great. Also, I suspect you could kiss that man's ass for a month and he still wouldn't do anything that would prevent a guy like him from making as much money as possible.

Today's Video Link

Hey, how do they make baseballs? If this video is correct, there's more work-by-hand in them than I would have imagined…

VIDEO MISSING

An Old Political Rant

I may be kinda busy the next few days — too busy to write any long posts — but here's a replay of one I wrote on 11/13/2004 following that year's presidential election and results which caused a lotta folks to wonder if the right ticket had won. Draw whatever parallels to our current situation that you may like. (By the way: Michael Badnarik was that year's candidate of the Libertarian Party. I didn't remember him either and had to look him up.)

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It's hard to get on a political website this week without confronting the question of whether our recent presidential election was fixed. This is a shame because it largely overwhelms what is probably a more valid, fixable issue, which is whether our recent presidential election was run with all possible competence. It may well be that no one tried to rig the vote in any way but that there were still a lot of errors committed and undependable machines employed, and that the people responsible need to be slapped around a little and forced to correct things.

Unfortunately, Americans don't seem to get mad about the possibility that votes were lost or miscounted unless they think it caused their side to lose an election. After the mess of 2000, I can't recall a single prominent Republican expressing outrage that the machines yielded such arguable results, that voters were wrongly purged from the voting rolls, that ballots were confusing, etc. Some quietly urged a reform of the system, if only so that their side wouldn't get accused of cheating the next time…but there was no public outrage from the winners, and the losers were too busy charging fraud to deal with what may have been simple ineptness.

If principle trumped partisanship, both sides would have been equally incensed…and probably about errors, not rigging. Most of the improvements that were put in place seem to have been a matter of local officials knowing they could not defend their voting machines and procedures and not wishing to become "the next Florida." In some cases, it would seem they replaced old, unreliable systems with newer, unreliable systems…and that the appeal of paperless voting machines is not that they're easier to rig but that it's more difficult to prove if they're just plain wrong.

My hunch is that the recent election was not stolen but that there were an awful lot of irregularities that should not have occurred. My further hunch is that if angry Democrats were to shut up about the vote now, there would be a lot less impetus to fix those irregularities.

I know this was not likely but I kinda wish John Kerry's concession speech had instead said something like this…

It now appears that when all the ballots are counted, we will not have enough electoral votes to win the presidency…however, Senator Edwards and I have decided that it is not in the best interest of this country that we concede at this time. We have dozens of reports of questionable vote counts, of precincts that logged more votes than they have registered voters, and of provisional and absentee ballots that have not even been opened. Many of these are in states where they cannot possibly affect whether the state's electoral votes go to us or to the President…but that doesn't matter. Most of these are probably innocent, explainable errors…but that doesn't matter, either. Every American has the right to have his or her vote counted, and to have it counted accurately and given the same respect as any other vote.

We do not expect the result of this election to change but in the hope of changing how votes are recorded and counted in the future, we have decided not to concede until we are satisfied that every vote — whether it is for us, the President, Ralph Nader, Michael Badnarik or Daffy Duck — has been counted, and counted properly. If you are upset that this delays the resolution of this election, I'm sorry. Please direct your outrage to the people who are paid to count the votes accurately and, in some cases, have not done this.

There would have been howls of anger and charges of "sore loser," I'm sure. But I think most of America would have respected it, and it might have done some good. In this day and time, there's no excuse for a vote count the losers can't accept just as readily as the winners.

Oral Interaction

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I just ordered — and may someday have the time to actually read — a new book by Chris Smith called The Daily Show (The Book): An Oral History. It's interviews with darn near everyone who worked on the Jon Stewart years of The Daily Show so how can that not be interesting? You can read about some of its more interesting revelations here and you can order a copy here.

Sorry to hear it only mentions the Craig Kilborn years in a negative context. Kilborn always seemed a bit infatuated with himself but the show was very entertaining when he was its anchor. Some people now seem to recall that Stewart took over a lousy show and made it great. I think he took over a good show and made it better.

Recommended Reading

Kevin Drum wonders how many of the bizarre tweets and statements of Donald Trump are calculated to distract attention from his more serious shortcomings. I sure think we'll soon see the day when even folks who cheered his election will wonder how it was that they and others thought, in the Clinton-Trump matchup, she was the one with the unethical and dishonest track record.

Thin Skin Win

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When I first saw the above tweet from our president-select, I thought what you thought: Jeez. This guy has so many ego problems, he can't even be satisfied to win the Presidency of the United States. It's bugging the hell out of him that Hillary got two million more votes than he did. His "prize" is tainted.

And that might be what's going on here but maybe it's more like this: Trump deals in "facts" that are so vague, they can't be disproven. That's why so many times, the lie is in the form of "I'm hearing that…" It's a way of getting the fib out there without accepting responsibility for it or having to back it up in any way. In this case, he's assuming that no one can prove there weren't millions of illegal votes…or at least can't prove it so decisively that he and his supporters can't insist it's so.

But maybe he darn well knows there was no significant volume of illegal votes for Hillary Clinton.  Maybe it's as simple as this: Trump is going to try to pass certain laws and change certain things about America that, polls and common sense tell us, most Americans do not want to see happen.  But if someone objects and points out that a majority of voters didn't want him, he's going to say, "That's a lie.  I got more votes than Hillary.  America gave me a mandate."  It's not a claim so much as a negotiating position, a way of saying "I'm going to do what I want."

Hard to believe that many of those who voted for Trump thought Barack Obama was seizing too much power, ain't it?

My Latest Tweet

  • Hey, if Trump can claim he won the popular vote, we all can! Tweet your victory claim with the hashtag #IWonThePopularVote.