Monthly Archives: September 2021

I got behind in posting these. Each week, Sergio Aragonés and I answer a question or two from Groo readers. Here are Weeks 3 and 4…

Fred Kaplan delves into why Donald Trump has a sudden veneration of Robert E. Lee…and, of course, a complete distortion of who Lee was and what he did.

Fred writes, "It is unclear why Trump is so passionate about Lee" and then offers up some theories. I'll offer two of my own. One is that Trump has a pretty good sense of what his followers want to hear and he just says such things with no regard as to truth or even how what he says might sit with those who are not solidly in the Trump camp. The other is that Trump admires a loser who people wrongly think was a winner.

If you get Pluto TV, you can now watch the Garfield & Friends channel — a channel that just runs a show that I wrote, 24/7.

If you don't get Pluto TV, you can watch it online at this link. These are copies of the show that were remastered a few years ago to be in high-def and wider in screen format. The opening and closing titles had to be re-created and we took the opportunity to fix some mistakes in the closing credits, especially in the voice credits.

There are no commercials on this channel — at least, not now — but every so often at random times, they interrupt the programming to show you a little animated graphic that tells you "We'll be right back." I have no idea why they do this or why they don't do it between cartoons instead of in the middle of them.

I couldn't find a good online video of Art Metrano doing his "Amazing Metrano" routine to the tune of "Fine and Dandy."  That's odd because there was a period there when you almost couldn't turn on your TV without seeing it.  He did it on Carson, he did it on Laugh-In…I think he was the entire house "orchestra" on one of Tim Conway's many shows…

He was also a darn good comic actor as he proved in most everything he did, including a couple of the Police Academy movies.  I met him once in the NBC commissary.  It was crowded and a friend of mine and I were wandering around with our trays full of alleged lunch, looking for a table with two empty seats.  There were two at a table Chuck McCann was sharing with Art and Chuck waved us over and did the introductions.  I do not remember a thing that was said other than that Mr. Metrano seemed like a real nice guy and he was pleased that I thought he was funny.

He would have been funny in a lot more TV shows and movies had he not taken an awful fall off a ladder one day and fractured his first, second and seventh vertebrae.  What an awful thing to happen to such a friendly, funny man.  What an awful thing to happen to anybody.

You can read a good obit of him here and I was especially interested in one thing that was mentioned in it…

Managed by Wally Amos of Famous Amos cookie fame, Metrano and a friend, future Mel Brooks collaborator Rudy De Luca, were hired as writer-performers on a variety show starring Al Lohman and Roger Barkley that played on California stations after the local 11 o'clock news on Sunday nights. (Also working on the program: Craig T. Nelson, John Amos, McLean Stevenson and Barry Levinson.)

I remember that series. It was called different things in the TV Guide listings but on-air, they referred to it as The Lohman & Barkley. No "show." Just "The Lohman and Barkley." It was not on Sunday nights after the news, at least in Los Angeles. It was on Saturday nights at 11:30 after the news and it bumped the previous occupant of that time slot — The Saturday Tonight Show featuring Johnny Carson reruns — to Sunday nights. They had Ed McMahon record a new into renaming it The Sunday Tonight Show.

It was a brilliant, hilarious, "break all the rules" show that my friends and I loved…about as close to Monty Python as I've seen any American series come. Or at least, that's how I remember it. I am not ruling out the possibility that if I saw them today, I'd have a different opinion…but I can't see them today because those shows seem to have disappeared off the face of this planet.

It was very funny and also important. While it did not bring in the proper revenues to allow it to continue, something about the reaction to it seems to have led NBC to decide that in lieu of Johnny's reruns, the network should be programming a comedy show there and to make sure affiliates couldn't bump it to Sunday, they'd do it live and put "Saturday Night" in its name.

If anyone ever comes across any tapes of The Lohman & Barkley, I'd love to see if it's even close to as good as I remember. It seems to be where Art Metrano got his big break.

And getting back to the (now, sadly) late Mr. Metrano, there is much more to his story. He told a lot of it to my buddy Kliph Nesteroff in an interview. Here's a link to Part One and here's a link to Part Two. Like I said…a funny man.

My buddy Bob Bergen is the voice of Porky Pig and sometimes other Looney Tunes Royalty, as well as oodles of characters and creatures of a non-Warners variety. He's also one of the most respected teachers of voiceover skills and watchdogs for the interests of voice actors. No one knows more about the field than Bob. No one works harder to maintain the integrity of the profession and to watch out for those who would exploit both well-established pros and wanna-be-established newcomers.

The other day, he posted this piece to Facebook and I think it's spot-on and important. I don't usually post the writings of others on this blog but I decided this was worthy of an exception and I got Bob's O.K. to share it with you. But let me first give you a bit of background…

Any "glamour" profession — the kind folks dream of getting into some day — attracts way more wanna-bes than there could be "be"s. Way more people want to be professional baseball players than could ever achieve that and it isn't just that some people are better at it than others. There's also simple math. Under the rules of Major League Baseball, the Dodgers can only have 40 players signed at any given time and only 25 on the active roster. If 300 men dream of becoming Dodgers, 260 ain't going to get contracts, no matter what.

Like I said: simple math. (And I suspect the actual number is way more than 300…)

And just as certain as that is that there will be plenty of people and businesses that see an opportunity to make money in various ways off the mob and its dreams. These days, a record number of kids (and they aren't all kids) want to have a career like Bob's. That means there's a record number of enterprising folks offering services to that record number of kids who aren't all kids. And as is inevitable, they are not all beneficial or benevolent. There are some excellent teachers out there (Bob is one) and some terrible ones who might as well be holding aspiring voice actors upside-down by the ankles and shaking them to see how much money will fall out of their pockets.

V123, which Bob mentions, is an online service where you join and pay a fee — the top tier of membership is close to $5000 a year — and you get access to postings from people and companies seeking voiceover performers for various jobs. You can then record auditions and submit them and I have no idea what the success rate is. Perhaps the math works for some members. There are other such services…what Bob calls "pay to play."

All I can say is that the voiceover specialists who would use such a service are probably (a) dreaming of getting the kinds of jobs that would never be cast this way and (b) dreaming of having the kinds of careers currently being enjoyed by voiceover artists who don't get hired this way.

And Backstage and Drama-Logue, which Bob also mentions, are/were weekly newspapers for the up-and-coming actor, purchased mainly for their listings of auditions. And now, I'll shut up and turn the blog/floor over to Mr. Bergen…

So, I'm reading online that V123 has partnered with Backstage. It is no secret I am not a fan of the Pay to Play V.O. industry. (and please refrain from defending it on this thread, cuz I'm not interested in having that conversation here….trust me, I know it is here to stay)

When I was first pursuing professional acting, Backstage in NY was the heartbeat of the theater industry. Major theater stars had agents to get them into Broadway and off Broadway auditions. But for the majority pursuing, they relied on Backstage for open calls, where they would line up on sidewalks waiting for hours in their audition attire for their moment of opportunity, their backpack or duffle bag filled with their server attire for their survival job(s) both before and after the audition.

I'm often asked if I have any regrets in my career. Not many. But the scenario mentioned above is the big one. I know many think this actor lifestyle sounds like hell, especially for today's P2P v.o. actor. And many pursuing v.o. today do not have "actor" in their blood. They have "make money" in their hearts, which perpetuated the growth of P2P v.o. But I so wish I had lived this east coast life of an actor, if even for a short period.

When I began pursuing voiceover in Los Angeles, we had a magazine called Drama-Logue. If you know that name, you are of a certain age. As large as Los Angeles is, Drama-Logue had a small town feel. It posted indie and college film auditions, articles on marketing and career advice, etc. L.A. has never been a big money making theater town. Drama-Logue posted Equity waiver auditions. These shows did not pay. But they were a great opportunity to work on craft and invite agents and CDs to showcase your work. My career got a lot of value from performing in waiver shows. And, I produced my one man show under the Equity Waiver agreement.

Drama-Logue also advertised coaches and workshops. This is how I found my first v.o. workshop when I was 14. I saw a copy of this paper on our neighborhood newsstand next to Variety and Hollywood Reporter. I knew nothing about this paper but I took a risk and found a workshop. Back then, there weren't many v.o. workshops out there but all were great. All of em! And I studied with em all! (OK, some were better than others. But all brought value that I use and share to this day.) My parents paid for my classes, which were $10 a week. They had a rule. I had to keep a C average in school and they would keep paying for my v.o. classes. I just got lucky that these classes had integrity and were professional.

When I started teaching my own v.o. workshop, I went to the Drama-Logue office in Hollywood to purchase ad space. The office was a bustling room of wall to wall desks. Think Lou Grant newsroom. Phones ringing off the hook, and lots of cigarette smoke. The ad staffer was this weathered lady (probably in her early 40s) with a voice like Harvey Fierstein. I was there with checkbook in hand to buy my ad. But before I could, she sat me down and drilled me. She wanted to know where I had trained, my body of work, and my workshop curriculum. For all intents and purposes, she vetted me.

She made me nervous. But even early in my career, I had a bit of chutzpah and asked her, "So…does everyone have to pass an interview process to give you money to advertise?" She looked over the top of her chained-around-the neck glasses, puffed her cigarette, and on a smoke-filled exhale said, "Our readers trust this paper. I won't approve any advertising unless I feel they are legit!"

Fortunately, I passed inspection. Oh — and the paper had terms/claims that were not permitted in ads: "Get discovered!" "Make Money!" "Double Your Income/Bookings," etc. These are claims I have never made and never will. I cannot guarantee my own success. No way I can do this for others.

A few years later, Backstage purchased Drama-Logue and launched Backstage West in L.A. It lost that small town feel of Drama-Logue. By this time, the internet had launched and I stopped needing to advertise my workshop in the trades.

So now it seems V123 has partnered with Backstage. In all honesty, it feels like an organic progression. Not a good one, IMO, just a sign of the times. Gone are the days of a Drama-Logue type of quality control. Some today might think of my vetting experience as discrimination. I didn't then and I do not now. I appreciated that this paper did not want to endorse anyone they didn't believe in. They would have rather not taken my money than promote a lesser-than-honest coach to acting wannabes.

This kind of quality control and integrity is long gone. Today's world of online v.o. is a homogenized pile of confusion where the selling point is to make money, not strive for excellence. Those who are excellent stand a better chance of working, but there are no guarantees for anyone. Some great actors cannot catch a break and there are mediocre actors living in Beverly Hills.

The internet is more vast but it does not provide the quality control that was Drama-Logue. Sometimes bigger is not better.

As we near the twentieth anniversary of 9/11, Salon writer Mary Elizabeth Williams reminds us of how much that people recall from that day did not actually happen. Obviously, there is much that has been almost willfully distorted or misremembered by folks seeking to mold it to bolster their political agendas. But that aside, there are a lot of memories that are just wrong.

If you're going to wallow in 9/11 again this week — and I'll remind you it is by no means mandatory — I have a suggestion. Thanks to the Internet and its hoarders, there are hundreds of places where you can download or just watch the news coverage from that day. Here's one of many. Pick out a channel and watch its broadcast from just before the reports of the first plane hitting the North Tower until you've had enough. That was how most of us experienced it that morning…staring at the screen.

I did this a few years ago. I have a friend who was too young to understand what was happening that day. She was asking me questions about it…what it was like to see it all unfold…and I told her what I could and said, "You know, you can watch it pretty much the same way I did."

Years ago, I downloaded five or six hours each of CBS, ABC, NBC and CNN that morning. They're stored on my harddisk and I'm not sure why because it's not like that material could ever be difficult to find online. But we arbitrarily picked the ABC coverage, much of which was anchored by Peter Jennings, and we watched it together — no pausing, no fast-forwarding. It felt like stepping into a time machine and it was chilling and gut-wrenching. There were even moments when I had that "what's going to happen next?" sensation even though I already knew.

I'm not necessarily recommending you do this. It can be a bit tummy-churning and depressing. But if you feel that you should devote some time this week to remembering 9/11, this might he preferable to a documentary. Documentaries about tragedies that were extensively covered on the news often turn into documentaries on how the news was covered that day instead of what happened that day.

And I don't think I'll be able to watch anything on 9/11 without marveling at how Rudy Giuliani went from being the most heroic figure in the country to his current position somewhere between Derek Chauvin and Mike Richards.

If you are enraged about what Texas has done regarding abortion and would like to be even more enraged, read Amanda Marcotte on how Governor Abbott's statements that sound naïve are anything but.

This falls into the category of "How come I didn't know this before?" Being the age I am, I take a few pills every morning — some vitamins, some prescriptions. The prescriptions aren't vital ones and my health insurance gives them all to me either free or for a few bucks…with one recent exception. Last month, one of my doctors suggested I should take a certain new (to me) pill and he warned, "Your insurance might not cover this one."

He was right. I took the prescription to my friendly neighborhood CVS Pharmacy and when they filled it, the lady behind the counter told me it would be $63.00 for my thirty pills. I know there are people reading this who pay a lot more for some some necessary drug but this one didn't seem particularly necessary and $63.00 is more than double what I've been spending on all my other medications per month. I started wondering if maybe I didn't need to spend $750+ a year on this new (to me) medication.

Fortunately, I have a friend at my friendly neighborhood CVS Pharmacy. I don't know her name but she always remembers mine.  She's an older woman who works behind the counter and I think she likes me. When she sees me waiting in line to pick up a prescription, she instantly fetches it and if the registers are all busy, opens a new one for me.

It was a different CVS employee who told me my new prescription would be $63.00 and my friend, noticing my momentary hesitancy, came over and told the lady waiting on me, "I'll take care of Mr. Evanier here."  Then she looked at my prescription and said, "That's too much" and went over to one of their computers and did this or that…or something.  When she came back, my prescription was now $32.35.  I thanked her, paid, thanked her again and left with my pills.  I somehow didn't think to ask her, "How did you do that?"

Last night, I went in to pick up my refill on that medication.  My friend was not on the premises and the lady who waited on me this time said the next thirty days of pills would be $106 and some change.  I told her the story of how the price had been lowered the previous month and she said, "Let me see what I can do."  She went over to the other computer, did this and that and then asked me, "Is $32.35 okay?"

I said it was fine and she rang it up for $32.35, just like before.  This time though, I asked her, "How did you do that?"  She said, "We have a discount card we can apply."

Usually when it looks like I'll be taking some medication indefinitely, I have my doctor give me a 90-day prescription and I send it to Caremark, which is the mail order division of CVS and they fill it every three months thereafter.  I asked the lady in the CVS last night, "If I do that, can they give me the same discount?"  She said, "Sure.  Just tell them you want the discount."

Hearing, as we all do about how rough it can be to pay for necessary drugs these days, I'm a bit stunned.  I'm sure it doesn't work with every prescription but it worked with that one.  Maybe it would have worked with some of the others I've had filled there.  I never thought to ask.

Sergio and I answer questions from Groo readers…

We're four days from an avalanche of articles and specials about 9/11. Fred Kaplan — who was not far from the twin towers when the first one fell — gets a head start on discussing what that day has meant to America.

Fred Rupnow, who often sends me links of interest, sent me to a piece by J. Kingston Pierce. Pierce thinks Harry O, which starred David Janssen, was the second-best "private eye" series ever done for television, eclipsed only by The Rockford Files. I would rank those shows in the other order but that's not one of those debates that's worth a whole lot of anyone's time…

…and even I might have a tough time deciding if it was just a matter of comparing the first two seasons of Rockford Files' six to the only two that were made of Harry O. Both of those seasons were put out on DVD several years ago but they're expensive and sometimes hard to find. I liked them a lot.

This morning, I was a guest (live via ZOOM from my home office) on GoodDay, a local show on the CBS and CW affiliate in Sacramento for…well, they said it would run four minutes and it went six-and-a-half. The topic was supposed to be about the boxed set of Marvel Mini-Books for which I wrote the foreword and we did get to it but the hosts wanted to talk about Jack Kirby first so we did.

I should have clarified that I met Jack in 1969 and went to work with him, along with my pal Steve Sherman, in 1970. I also meant to mention Stan Lee and Joe Simon but somehow didn't figure out where to do so. And to clarify my opening line, this segment followed a remote from an art festival up north which displayed lovely chalk drawings done on the sidewalks…

Reader-of-this-site Matthew Harris read my rerun of Tales of My Childhood #8 and wrote to ask…

So, if you had a high schooler and they found themselves in the spot you'd been in, would you as their parent try to handle things another way?

Interesting question…but my first thought is that asking me to imagine myself married with a kid is like asking me a question that starts, "Supposing you were an aardvark…" It's very difficult for me to project myself into that situation. Here's the best I can do…

The core of the story is that my father desperately wanted me to go to and graduate college because he was convinced I'd never amount to anything in this world if I didn't. I absolutely understand why he thought that then — most parents probably did — but with hindsight, I now know that I was an exception. The semesters I spent at U.C.L.A. did not help my career one bit. If anything, they impeded it and things got much, much better for me when I quit.

Now, if I had a kid whose career trajectory seemed to require a college degree — many do — I don't know what I'd do. But I'd certainly consider the possibility that his might not, which would make it a very different story…especially today when I wouldn't, as my father did, have seen getting into college as a way to also keep my son from being drafted and sent to Vietnam.

A fact I should perhaps have added to the piece is that my father not only wanted me very, very much to get a college degree, he wanted me to get it at U.C.L.A. Apart from the obvious prestige of that school compared to some, getting in there also meant that I would be living at home. I was an only child. If my father had had his way, I never would have moved out of my room in his house. A few years later when I did, it was a very emotional matter.

I'm not sure what he'd have done if I'd gotten accepted at some university outta-town and it meant going off to school and living elsewhere. I don't think that would have ever been an issue if I'd had kids because I know how much better my life was after I moved to my own apartment. I would have encouraged it at the right time.

My father saw me going to college as a way to (1) help me get a good career, (2) avoid the draft and (3) live at home as long as possible. If I had had a child, I don't think any of those concerns would have applied. And I have no idea what any parent could have done about Mr. Payton.

And Feliz Navidid! (Oh, wait: That's Merry Christmas!) Feliz Cumpleaños to my best friend in the Male and Facial Hair categories, Sergio Aragonés. I just figured out that I have known this man for 73% of my life and admired his talent as a cartoonist for about 76%. If you totaled up all the fights and cross words we've had in that time, it comes out to about three-and-a-half minutes…and each teensy squabble was followed by a lot of "You were right! / No, you were right!"

Sergio…I was going to send you a birthday card but I'm not going to stores much these days and I also realized that if I did, you'd have to take the time to open it and there's no way it would be as well-drawn as if you just drew it yourself. So please draw your own birthday card and sign my name to it. And make it really, really fancy because I like you an awful lot.

I trust that anyone who lives in California and is smart enough to find their way to this website has already voted "NO" on the ridiculous recall effort. Gavin Newsom has made some mistakes as governor of this state but they're pretty much all mistakes that every other governor has made due to the need to set down policies regarding COVID-19 while scientists were still figuring out how dangerous it was and how it was transmitted. Seems to me the main driving force behind this recall effort is the wing of the Republican party that believes that every elected Democrat must be impeached, recalled, removed from office and (if possible) jailed just for being a Democrat.