I used to have this ridiculous problem of spam calls from contractors who wanted to give me free estimates on home repairs. Obviously, my contact info was on some lists that contractors or telemarketers were purchasing and I was sometimes getting ten or more of these a day. These were not robocalls where I answered and found a computer voice on the line. There were human beings there.
Sometimes, they were actual contractors looking for work. Sometimes, they were outta-work people who had no contact with that field until they answered an ad somewhere — some of them, probably on Craig's List — to allegedly make loads of money. They were supplied a list of prospects to cold-call. The way they would supposedly make those huge sums was to get someone like, say, me to say, "Yes, I'd love a free estimate" and then if that led to me spending money with the contractor they represented from afar, they'd get a commission.
A couple of times, I asked the caller if he or she really was a contractor or was directly employed by one…or if they just answered an ad to make this kind of call. A few gave me what seemed to be honest answers and it was usually the latter. I asked one of those folks, "How close have you come to making the kind of dough the ad promised?" and he said, "Well, the ad said I could make $1200 and up a week and so far, I must have made over a thousand calls and I haven't made Dime One." That sounds about right to me.
Those calls abated to be replaced by an endless series of recorded robocall pitches to get a solar installation or to extend my car warranty. And lately I get a lot of calls from people who say they're with a health care company who's "working with Medicare" and one of my doctors — they somehow can't say which one — wants them to send me medical equipment for which they will bill Medicare, not Yours Truly.
And then today, I got my first contractor call in quite a while. A gent who oughta be auditioning the next time they make Popeye cartoons phoned, identified himself as with a home remodeling firm and the exchange went like this…
HIM: I'm calling to see if you're ready for your free home estimate on all the repairs and remodeling you have planned or if you want me to call back in a few weeks.
ME: Can you give me a little more time than that?
HIM: Sure. How much do you need?
ME: Call me around the turn of the century. How about late December, 2099?
And so help me, he sounded like he was writing it down and then he said, "Fine. Expect our call then." I figure by that time, I may need something done around here. Maybe a paint job…