Alex J., who I assume is not Alex Jones, writes to ask…
It would seem you've been going to Las Vegas for quite some time. What was it at the time that attracted you to the city then and how has it changed?
Well, it seems to have changed a lot since COVID-19 descended upon this world but I haven't been to Vegas to see what it's like now there because of that. It sure doesn't look enticing from afar and here's one of many reasons: Something I liked about the town was that when you were there, it was like being on a different planet where nothing mattered except gambling, food and entertainment. You could just turn off the part of your brain that might have to even think about anything else.
I doubt I could do that in an environment of who's wearing a mask and who isn't and "What's open?" and "Where do I sit to eat?" and "I just touched that so I need some hand sanitizer" and so on. And I really don't want to fly either.
Going back to before The Pandemic: Las Vegas got more expensive. There were lots of bizarre-sounding shows that one could go to that were nine bucks with a coupon so I'd take a chance. Now, they were thirty or forty bucks so I didn't take that chance.
There were also acts playing Vegas that had been around for years. I love Old Show Biz and when I started going to Vegas, they had plenty of Old Show Biz in their showrooms. My pal Pete Barbutti was playing somewhere. Dave Barry was at The Mint. Jackie Vernon was at the Marina. The last two burlesque comics — Dexter Maitland and Irv Benson — were at the Hacienda…and they were followed in there by Lance Burton. Lance was a (relatively) new guy but he had a wonderfully-intimate and classic magic show that was $15 with a coupon.
I knew a lot of folks who could get me backstage. All the time I've worked in television, I've rarely felt surrounded by "Show Business" the way I felt it backstage at the Union Plaza or the Paddlewheel or the Stardust. It was not just the showgirls walking around naked, though I doubt any male would be indifferent to that. It was the immediacy of what was going on there: Live performances, live audience, live applause…
There's not as much of that anymore. When they replaced the Sands with the Venetian, they kept the gaming but not the history.
Blackjack has even changed…or is changing. When I was playing a lot and counting cards, a "natural" (an Ace plus one card worth 10) got you a 3:2 payout. Now, casinos are increasingly changing it to a 6:5 payout. Doesn't seem like much I know but the old way, the casino only had about a 0.5% advantage over the players. 6:5 gives them more like a 2% advantage and that just kills even the remote possibility that I would ever get back into that game.
Blackjack was the only game in town that interested me. It was not the money. It was that it was a game where skill mattered, especially if you were counting cards. I gave it up once I satisfied myself that I was playing it well enough to give me that microscopic advantage over The House instead of the other way around. I got "ahead" but I was well aware that if I kept playing, I'd eventually hit a streak of bad hands and lose all that I'd won. It was impossible that that would not happen.
Then I'd have a choice: Commit to playing until I got ahead again and then quit…or end my Blackjack binging as a loser. It seemed easier to quit while I was ahead. It was getting to feel like work anyway. The way I played, it took long hours at the tables, much of it surrounded by cigarette smoke which I can't stand. I could have made the same money in that amount of time (and breathed more easily) by going up to my room and writing a comic book script on my laptop.
I quit Blackjack. I lost my access to (and much of my interest in) "going backstage." The ladies I knew there all stopped performing and married and/or moved outta town. Writing in hotel rooms got to seem like a little less fun.
I still like Las Vegas — or at least, pre-Pandemic Vegas — and I'm sure I'll be back there when/if it's like that again. I like exploring the corners of it I've never visited. I like watching the people. I like keeping my own hours and eating when I feel like it…and I know some great places to eat there. I like the air of excitement and the fact that you can wallow in it and then when you've had enough, shut it off by going back to your hotel room.
But I don't like it as much as when I was younger and there was more of what I call "Old Show Biz" and I could go backstage and feel a certain glamour that I rarely felt in television. It went away for me somewhere between the time they imploded the Hacienda and they opened the fifth or sixth Cirque du Soleil show in town.
