Monthly Archives: March 2020

Just what you need to cheer you up in these harried times: Weird Al Yankovic on a balcony somewhere playing "Classical Gas" on his accordion…

Most of the late night shows are returning to the air with all-new shows, most (all?) of which will involve remotes from the hosts' homes and guests in their own homes, all connected over the Internet. Some of them have been broadcasting a combination of new segments from their hosts' homes and repeat material but it looks like they're going all-new and make more effort to approximate what they did in the studio.

Jimmy Fallon, Samantha Bee and The Daily Show came back this week. John Oliver resumes this Sunday, Colbert returns on Monday and Bill Maher comes back a week from today. No word yet on return dates for Seth Meyers, Jimmy Kimmel or James Corden. Corden is hosting a benefit show in prime time on Monday with proceeds going to the CDC Foundation, a non-profit that supports the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's work, and Feed the Children.

If linking-in guests this way over the web works, it might not be completely abandoned once it's no longer a medical necessity. It's cheap and people in television like cheap. I'm also thinking that so many people in various industries are now working from home that we'll see a lot more of that after the coronavirus is history. In many businesses, someone is going to be saying, "I've been thinking…why do we need the huge, expensive office?"

Turner Classic Movies is running It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World tonight (or tomorrow morning, if you want to get technical) at 1 AM. A lot of people know this is my favorite movie but I sometimes have to explain that it's my favorite movie when viewed on a big, big, big, big screen with a big, big, big, big audience. I like it a lot less on a small screen watched alone or with just a few, few, few, few people.

In fact, I think when I do watch it the latter way, my main enjoyment comes from how it reminds me of previous times when I saw it on a big, big, big, big screen with a big, big, big, big audience. It's one of those films — I could name several — that was made to be experienced like that. Even though I'm on the commentary track of the Criterion DVD/Blu Ray release, I do not recommend watching it that way except (let me put that in bold: except) to remind you of the happy time you had seeing it on a big screen with a big audience.

My lovely friend Amber has not seen it because I have not shown it to her because I have not been able to take her to see it the way it should be seen. I am not suggesting you not watch it or TiVo it tonight on TCM even if you have never seen it as God and Stanley Kramer intended it. I'm just suggesting that even if you see it repeatedly on television or home video, you haven't seen it until you've seen it as you should see it. Thank you.

As we hit the two-week mark here in my Fortress of Solitude (not to be confused with any Fortress of Solitude in which you may be living), we pause and reflect — first of all on why we're saying "we" when it's just me here. I mean, that's the whole point of a Fortress of Solitude, isn't it? I'll do a deft, undetectable pronoun switch in the next paragraph.

It's now been two weeks since my doctor told me to stay in, don't go out, avoid the plague as if it were the plague and generally isolate myself. The primary goal here — and certainly a worthy one — is to not come down with the raging coronavirus that our esteemed president seems to have stopped telling us was a Democratic Hoax that would be gone in days. The fallback goal, if the primary cannot be achieved, is to not get it now when our nation's health services are already overwhelmed and struggling to cope with volume, volume, volume. I'm still working for that primary goal.

Groping to find less-horrible aspects of this thing, I recognize that a National Vacation — even one taken under duress and causing great destruction in a 360° circle — has its value. And those of us who'll come away from this will come away with an adventure we'll speak of forever after. I'm not suggesting mine is any more interesting than yours when I write about mine on my blog. I'm just doing because it's my blog and filling it is something I can still do.

My mother, the last decade or so of her life, came largely unstuck in time and not like Billy Pilgrim. She rarely ventured out of her house and when she did the last few years, it was just for medical appointments and ambulance rides. She lived by no clock. She ate not on any predetermined schedule but whenever she felt like she wanted to eat. She slept when she was tired and it wasn't always at night when a normal person would sleep. She might take to bed at Noon and wake up at 10 PM.

I always called her between 5 PM and 6 PM but did not panic when it took many rings for her to answer. If she happened to be in hibernation, she'd eventually pick up the phone on her bedside table, tell me she was fine and we'd agree that we loved each other…then she'd hang up and go back to sleep.

She listened to TV (by that age, she could not really see it) whenever she wanted the company. She had no favorite shows, no program she just had to have on when it was telecast. Often, what she listened to was Don Imus's TV show because what the hell else are you going to listen to at 5:30 in the morning? The Imus program was essentially a radio show on television and you didn't miss anything by not being able to see it.

At times when I've been immersed in a script that requires many days to complete, I have lived like that for a week or so at a time. It's more fun in Las Vegas because something's always open there so if you want a slice of pizza at 4 AM, there actually is a slice of pizza at 4 AM. But I've lived like that here and it's fine in short spurts if you can cope with the occasional need to do something on the timetable of the rest of the world. My mother had to be awake and reasonably functional when a caregiver came or a doctor appointment demanded her presence.

I'm living a little like that now.

Yesterday, I cleaned myself up and left my house, driving for the first time in two weeks. It was to my doctor's office where things were peaceful and there weren't a lot of people and a lot of them were nurses cleaning anything anyone touched, seconds after they touched it. The appointment was swift and easy. I passed a few tests, then felt the need to hurry back here to my Fortress of Solitude, taking a route that took me down La Cienega Boulevard and through the drive-thru at a Pollo Loco.

Later, I got two grocery deliveries — Instacart at 6 PM, Amazon Fresh around 8:30. I had not planned to get both on the same day but that's how the "next available delivery windows" played out. I'd ordered much the same things from both and happily, what one was out of, the other had. Instacart was out of my favorite potato chips, my favorite crackers and my favorite peanut butter. Amazon Fresh had my favorite potato chips, my favorite crackers and my favorite peanut butter but was out of a half-dozen things Instacart had brought me. Both delivered organic baby carrots but all the other dupes were things that have expiration dates in the far future so they'll get eaten in time.

So I have food. I have things to write. I have occasional company on the phone or Facetime. And since I stopped following the news closely, I have a general sense of peace but not, I hope, a naïve one. Horrible, horrible things are happening and I know we'll be recovering from them for years…but the important thing to remember is that most of us will be recovering. And while it may be tough to get through it, it sure beats the alternative.

Here's "The William Tell Overture" performed by my favorite singing group in the "One Hundred Members or More" category — The Ambassadors of Harmony. Saddle up…

On a topic not unrelated to the previous post, there is currently an awful lot of chaos and crisis in the world of publishing, distributing and selling comic books. I have an e-mail folder here full of requests to explain it and I will do you the favor of not explaining it. I know very, very little about that end of the industry, though I can recognize panic and financial hardship when I see them. Boy, do I wish Tom Spurgeon was still around to explain it to you…and to me.

Heidi MacDonald has some words about it here. Go read Rob Salkowitz, too.

If you are a fan of the fine books and magazines we get from TwoMorrows Publishing, go read what John Morrow has to say about the situation his company is now in. You might get some real good bargains out of it.

The San Diego Convention Center — home away from home to those of us who attend Comic-Con International there every year — is now cosplaying as a hospital of sorts. As Mayor Kevin Faulconer tweeted…

The convention center is a centerpiece of San Diego's economy. During this pandemic, it will be a centerpiece of our fight against the coronavirus. Preparations are underway to temporarily use parts of @SDConventionCtr and all of Golden Hall to shelter homeless individuals.

As this news story reports, they're spending a lot of money to bring in cots and install showers and do all sorts of things to handle the emergency. I started to write some silly lines about how they should leave those in place for us and I should go down there and host panels but this is all too serious. Let's just say I remain skeptical that this whole virus crisis will be over as soon as some want to think.

And this is as good a place as any to deal with the question of whether Comic-Con will be postponed from its July dates or not held at all this year. Let me say this very clearly: As far as I know, no decision has been made about that and it won't be for a few more weeks at least. There's time to wait for more information…and more information can be a very good thing when it comes to making important decisions.

The rumor is going around apparently that the folks who'll make that decision have already decided to not do it in July. I believe that this is some outsider's speculation being passed off as an insider tip. It may turn out to be exactly what they decide but it is not true now that the decision has been made. Do we all understand the difference? I believe that when the decision is made as to whether to have it in July or not, you will not hear it as a rumor. You will hear it loud and clear as an announcement.

…or as I might put it if being melodramatic, Day 13 of my self-imposed isolation. That might sound really important if two-thirds of the folks in this country weren't on Day 10-15 of their self-imposed isolations. Actually, I had a little company the first few days of mine but my cleaning lady aside, it's been ten days since anyone was in this house but me. I've taken one walk — down to an ATM to deposit three residual checks totaling about twelve dollars — but today, I'm driving over to my doctor's office for a minor test that has nothing to do with the coronavirus.

Then I plan to hurry back because I have a grocery delivery scheduled. If I get done at the doc's early, I might hit the Pollo Loco drive-thru and pick up a couple days worth of broiled chicken. If I do that, I'm going to have to decide whether or not to advance-order it via the Pollo Loco app on my iPhone. If I do, that's less human interaction once I get there. I just drive through the drive-thru, grab the bag and run. If I don't, I have to hassle with paying and getting change. Option 1 would seem like the wiser choice…but what if I order through the app then get there and there's a huge line of cars which is way too long to join?

This is the kind of strategic planning that's vital in these desperate times.

But I'm trying not to think of them as desperate times. I've accepted that I'm (we're) just going to have to live like this for an indeterminate time. Could be weeks, could be months. If this is as bad as it gets for me, it's not that bad. The other night, I said to a friend, "I've just been sitting at my desk in my pajamas, watching movies and/or working on my computer. Oh, how I long for the days when I used to sit at my desk in my pajamas, watching movies and/or working on my computer only about 90% of the time."

Actually, that percentage might be a little high. But it's not hard to live this way. Especially when there's no place to go.

Did you miss Frank Ferrante's online show on Sunday evening? If you did, you can watch it here…

This one comes to us from E.L. Sofer…

First, I love your blog and have been reading it for over a decade (I think…I didn't mark down the date.) Your keen knowledge and tasty explanations make me feel as if I were present to witness them. If only you liked cheese dip…

You had a recent posting titled "ASK me: Sun City scandals" and noted two specials from 1970 and 1972. I didn't realize that the topic was so virulent in America quiet that long ago, although I do recall a late 80s We-are-the-world-esque video called "Ain't Gonna Play Sun City."

I'm wondering if this is associated to the South African Venue, or — as mentioned once later in the article — it should have been SIN City. Could you please clarify?

And incidentally, I would be fascinated to know of any tales you're aware of about apartheid in comics production. I think that Stan wasn't very prejudiced, but I don't know about DC. And there were other publishers, certainly. So I'm curious. Thanks for the great column daily, and stay safe and socially distant. Although, to be fair…if the opportunity presented itself, I'd dare to come within five feet of you. That's how much I like your material!

I'm not even letting a beautiful woman who wants to sleep with me get within five feet of me at the moment so keep your distance. But once this is over, I hope we can all be with each other and maybe — dare I dream this? — even shake hands. Which is all I may do with the beautiful woman at first.

The "Sun City" in the title of those Johnny Carson specials referred to various retirement communities of the time, mainly in California, Arizona and Florida — places known for their sunshine — but mainly Sun City, Arizona which was one of the most famous ones. The "Sun City" of South Africa was not much in the news at the time and there was no connection. The one reference in my posting to "SIN city" was a typo which I've fixed.

I've been asked before about racism in the comic book industry. I've heard a few second- and third-hand accounts of certain individuals being less than positive about multiculturalism but not many; at least not many for a business that was as controlled as it was by white males.

Most folks who work in comics have been freelancers, including some who rarely if ever came into the office. There's one story about an editor who was overtly racist in his personal life but even he didn't care about anyone's skin color if they turned in good work on time. Jack Kirby, who was a pretty solid Liberal Democrat all his life, told me about that fellow and said, "He wouldn't have let a black guy marry his daughter but if the guy was good with a brush, he had plenty of work for him!"

This isn't to say the industry was free of prejudice. Just given the times — and what some women were up against — you'd think there would be some egregious cases of racism but if there were, I haven't heard about them.

Since the Metropolitan Opera House has gone dark, they've been posting online videos of some of their past productions. If you're into that kind of music, as I am occasionally, you might want to browse their site. Thanks to Dawna Kaufman for the tip.

My self-isolation had taken me completely away from broadcast and cable TV. I've watched a few online shows like Frank Ferrante's great Facebook webcast and I've been watching old TV shows, specifically episodes of Car 54, Where Are You? I think it was one of the funniest things ever on television. If you never saw it, here's the first episode…

Timothy Field wrote to ask…

I'm having trouble finding info about two prime time specials Johnny Carson was involved in which aired in the early '70s called Sun City Scandals. I know it featured past stars like Jack Oakie, Billy Gilbert, Louis Armstrong, Bette Davis and others. I don't know how if Carson just did intros or was involved with the stars of yesteryear. Here's hoping your fabulous brain has some memories of this.

There were two — one in 1970, one in 1972, both featuring Carson and a cast of show biz veterans who were much older than he was. He'd introduce them and some of them would do musical performances, some would do little mini-interviews and some would be in sketches in which Johnny participated. The whole idea was to showcase folks in their seventies and above but there was a melancholy note to the first.

In the 1970 show, Carson had to do a little voiceover at the end of the program to dedicate it to two guest stars who'd passed away between the time the show was taped and the time it aired. Edward Everett Horton died September 29, 1970 and Eddie Peabody died November 7, 1970. The show aired December 7, 1970.

I don't think anyone died before the telecast of the second one, which was March 13, 1972, even though the show had been taped the previous July. The long span between tape dates and air dates would suggest that NBC didn't consider either one a ratings-getter and was in no rush to get either one on the air.

You can see the cast lists over at IMDB. Here's the 1970 version and here's the 1972 version. I remember them as being pleasant enough, though with so many performers, none of them got a whole lot of screen time.

I further remember that while promoting the second, Johnny said that more were planned but they only did the two. I have a theory about Carson that up until the mid-seventies, he was expecting to stop doing The Tonight Show at some point and switch to an hour-long, weekly prime time variety show like some of his boyhood heroes had had…and he'd had briefly. The theory goes on to theorize that up until then, he viewed a late night talk show — even the preeminent late night talk show — as a step below a weekly prime time hour…and that at some point, he realized it wasn't. In fact, that format was dying out and it wiser to stick with the franchise he had, rather than the one he'd dreamed-of as a child.

So apart from the Tonight Show anniversary editions, he lost interest in prime time just as he'd lost interest in playing Las Vegas. And if my theory's right, that might explain why there were no more Sun City Scandals. Thanks, Timothy.

If you're coming to this site to get my "take" on the latest news, you're in the wrong place. I'm not following it…much.

I'm getting just enough to know if/when there are major developments, not enough to write about any of it. If I did, I'd suppose I'd be writing my usual essay on how the good thing about 24/7 news coverage is that it's always there when you need it and the bad thing about it is that it's still there, trying to fill all those hours, when you don't.

I'm just writing things and taking the occasional call from a friend who's going stir-crazy from five days of self-imposed isolation. I hate to think how the one I just got off the phone with will be if/when this stretches to five weeks or beyond. I'm not predicting it'll be that long — I'm not predicting anything except more maddening, self-obsessed utterances from our Chief Exec — but a lot of possibilities are possible. Not knowing when we might see a return to Normal Life — and what will not be there when we do — is one of the most uncomfortable aspects of this.

Would you like to see more content on this site that isn't about the pandemic? So would I. You can help by sending me questions for my ASKme posts. Here's the address: Ask ME. No politics, no personal replies…and tell me if you want me to leave your name out of it.

Looks like Randy Rainbow has plenty of time to make new videos…