For at least thirty years now, I've been getting ads in the mail from a place called The Danbury Mint, trying to sell me limited edition medallions, limited edition books, limited edition prints, limited edition coins and other limited edition goodies. They're on a never-ending quest for my limited edition dollars.
I would guess I've received 400+ offers from them and so far, I have ordered a grand total of zero. You'd think a company would give up after three decades of no response…maybe even wonder if there even is anyone at this address. But still the ads keep coming. The latest one probably annoys me more than it should. Here's the outside page of it…
It's for "the perfect gift" — a "personal diamond pendant" which will come inscribed with a pretty bad love poem from me to Dorothea. I don't know where they got my name and address in the first place but they also seem to have learned via some feat of data-mining, that I have some personal connection to someone named Dorothea…and that's true. Dorothea was the first name of my mother who died in 2012.
Inside the mailer, it says "Nothing sets a woman's heart aglow like the brilliance of real diamonds, especially when they are set in gleaming gold ion-plate against luxurious mother-of-pearl and arrayed in a stunning triple-heart design." Yes, I would imagine that wherever Mom is now, there's nothing she'd like better than that.
"As a crowning touch," it continues, "your names and the perfect sentiment are inscribed on the back! This heartwarming pendant will leave your sweetheart speechless." Hey, if you think she'd be speechless, imagine how I'd be if she showed up to accept "a gift she'll cherish forever." I suppose the only way I could present it to her is to rent a boat, sail out to where her ashes were scattered and lob it into the Pacific Ocean. The ghost of my dear mother might well then materialize to thank me for it but to tell me I wrote much better poetry when I was in fifth grade.
But hey, those must be some diamonds for $99 plus $7.50 shipping and service…or I can make three monthly payments for "the perfect gift" of just $35.50.
I just went to their website and filled out a little online form to be removed from all their mailings. During the process, a pop-up window tried to sell me a personalized diamond bracelet that is apparently also "the perfect gift." Yeah, just like how Donald Trump made "the perfect phone call."
The comic art community is struggling today to process this piece of bad news: The passing of comic book/strip journalist Tom Spurgeon at the age of either 50 or 51 depending on which news site you believe. Tom's own news site, The Comics Reporter, always got this kind of thing right and I hope someone will continue it. I also hope others will try to emulate what he did there, which was to be smart and perceptive and responsible. He was the best at which he did.
I think I first came to know Tom in the mid-nineties when he was editor of The Comics Journal, a post for which he collected an awful lot of Eisner Awards. He walked that narrow, sometimes difficult line of taking comics seriously without forgetting that they were, after all, comics. After leaving that position, he wrote a lot of very fine articles about comics and three books: Stan Lee and the Rise and Fall of the American Comic Book (written with Jordan Raphael), Comics As Art: We Told You So and The Romita Legacy, saluting John Romita Sr. I recommend them all to you, not just for what you'll learn about their subjects but what's there to learn about how to write about comics.
He was generous with his time and talent, and I can't imagine anyone who knew the man or his work who isn't saddened by this news.
Posted on Wednesday, November 13, 2019 at 10:26 AM
I seem to have the Impeachment Hearings on at least ten channels on my TV. CBS could be running Let's Make a Deal and The Price is Right…and while the names of those shows do have a lot to do with what's being discussed in those hearings, I can't help but think America would be better served if those shows were on Channel 2 instead of Adam Schiff and Devin Nunes. Maybe they could compromise and air a hybrid with Schiff and Nunes playing Plinko.
The duplication of effort gives us a choice of which pundits to watch during the recess periods but I don't see why we need that much choice of analysts and no choice of hour-long, overproduced game shows or people sitting around tables dishing each other and everyone.
And y'know, I felt that way during the Watergate era, too. If I owned CBS, NBC or ABC — and we may yet see the day when they'll be worth so little I can buy 'em all — I'd go with regular programming. I'd occasionally put up a little chyron/super to remind people that the hearings are currently live over on PBS or other channels. If I controlled NBC, I'd be airing Today with Hoda and Jenna right now and an on-screen message would remind people they can tune to MSNBC. Interestingly, I just noticed regular programming on CNBC. A couple of financial experts (I suppose) are talking about the stock market, which is what they do on that channel. One just speculated on how the hearings might impact the almighty Dow Jones but otherwise, it's business-as-usual.
So is anyone disadvantaged if live transmission of the hearings is only available on, say, four channels? I don't think so and I wonder what the financial impact on the networks is. How much is this costing them?
As I recall, during Watergate there was some talk that they were all covering it in part because it discharged some F.C.C. obligation they had to air non-commercial programming in the public interest. I don't think that obligation exists today. I also recall that late in the hearings — i.e., when they really got interesting — ABC, CBS and NBC began rotating coverage. Each day, one would air the hearings and the other two would telecast what they usually telecast. This was in response to the moans of soap opera followers and it seemed like a fine decision.
The networks oughta think about how much they want to pre-empt shows someone loves for hearings about Donald Trump wrongdoing. There could be awful lot of those hearings ahead.
Oh, I don't want to get hooked watching these. They're saying they could last six-to-eight weeks and I have things I have to do over the next six-to-eight weeks. I harmed parts of my life by watching the Watergate hearings. I even did something that was largely unprecedented in my life: I got up early in the morning.
Fortunately, evolving technology will likely spare me from that sacrifice. In 1973, I couldn't set a DVR to capture the whole thing and then play it back at a time of my choice, even fast-forwarding through the many pointless and repetitive segments. Today, I might not even have to do that because there are clips aplenty online and C-SPAN and other networks replaying stuff all day and into the night.
Still, it's tempting to be there live when something important is said. I hope, I hope, I hope I don't succumb to that…
Lots of folks online are arguing about Disney-Plus, the new streaming channel that gives a subscriber access to much of the infamous Disney Vault. Much of the talk is about how Dumbo is on there with, contrary to rumors and fears, no removal of any scenes that might have been scissored for antiquated racial portraits. I just read a thread where instead of celebrating Dumbo's non-laundering, people are furious that Song of the South is still not as easy to see as any other Disney classic.
I'm a little weary of suggestions that the withholding of Song of the South is right up there with the Spanish Inquisition and The Holocaust in the annals of injustice. First off, not issuing it on DVD has so far gotten very few people murdered. Secondly, it's a pleasant enough movie but I don't think it's in the Top Twenty of Disney classics. Thirdly, that doesn't matter a whole lot. It should be available to those who want to see it. Fourthly, it is and long has been.
Bootlegs abound. Legal foreign videos are out there (I have the Japanese Laserdisc) and there have been full copies that lingered on YouTube for many months before Disney got them pulled. Is there a Disney collector on this planet who doesn't have a copy? If so, they must not have looked very hard.
This is and always has been a controversy that is once-removed from the actual issue of racial stereotypes. For Disney, it must be a purely economic decision based on the way some people might (might!) react to it. It's some execs' decision that the income they'd derive from putting it out there would not be worth the tsuris…and that may be so but they should do it anyway.
Actually, every few years, word gets out that they're planning to turn it loose. Then someone there gets icy tootsies and they delay it. Maybe if the crows in Dumbo get zero complaints, it will bolster someone's courage. They'll put it out on home video or on streaming or most likely both.
And then what will happen? I'll predict there are groups and politicians that thrive on drumming up outrage and they won't resist the chance to do a lot of drumming. The folks who've seen the film and maybe own copies will quietly applaud its new legitimacy. And everyone else will kind of ignore it or if they do see it, ask, "What was all the fuss about?"
Cartoon writer and cartoonist Jack Enyart died at home on Sunday October 13, taken from us by pancreatic cancer. He was 69 years old and one of the cheeriest, friendliest people I ever met.
That first meeting was around 1976, give or take a year. He'd been drawing gag cartoons for magazines that didn't pay all that well and decided to try writing comic book scripts for Western Publishing's Gold Key line. After many a rejection, he appealed to one of the editors to tell him what he was doing wrong. The editor there gave him copies of a couple of my old scripts and said something like "This is what we're looking for." My phone number was on them so Jack called and asked if he could pay me to tutor him.
I wouldn't do this today but back then, no one had ever asked me for any kind of advice…and Jack seemed so nice on the phone that I invited him over. I think he insisted on stopping on the way over at my favorite pizzeria and picking up a pie we shared as I told him whatever I could. I didn't think I told him anything he didn't already know but after that, he began selling scripts to Gold Key and that somehow led to work writing cartoons.
Warner Brothers was doing a lot of what they called "paste-up" shows for CBS — half-hour Bugs Bunny specials that contained a few minutes of new animation wrapped-around judiciously chosen clips from the classic era. So he was the writer of the 1979 Bugs Bunny Thanksgiving Diet special and the 1980 Bugs Bunny Mystery Special and the 1982 Bugs Bunny's Mad World of Television and so on. He also wrote for all the local cartoon studios on shows including Scooby Doo, Heathcliff, Bionic Six, Fraggle Rock, Duck Tales and Alvin and the Chipmunks and occasionally did voices as well. He worked for me on Richie Rich and on some of the Hanna-Barbera comics I edited in the seventies.
Jack — a notorious snappy dresser — billed himself as "Man About Toon" and taught the craft of animation writing for many years in many venues, including online. You can watch a one-hour video interview with him on this page over on his website. While you're there, take a look at some of the other pages.
He was smart and funny and he really loved cartoons…though not as much as he loved Kay, his darling wife/partner of 36 years. She says there will be a "bang-up memorial celebration" some time next year. Just try and keep me away.
Today's Bad News for Donald Trump
Trump's lawyers keep fighting in the courts over a New York law that, if you just read it, says that his tax returns can be subpoenaed. And they keep losing.
Today's Outrage by Donald Trump
As the House Intelligence committee continues to release transcripts of its in-secret hearings, Trump continues to complain that chairman Adam Schiff is doctoring the transcripts. But lawyers for some of the witnesses whose testimony has been released don't seem to think that, nor do Republican members of the committee who participated in those interrogations. Will Trump stick with his charge and refuse to retract it? Hey, does a goose go barefoot?
An Article of Interest
Trump and his minions continue to demand that the Whistleblower be identified and cross-examined. It's pretty obvious that they want to smear the guy (and scare off other potential whistleblowers) and that if they can in any way discredit him — say, if he voted for a Democrat in the last twenty years — then they'll argue that that voids his allegations and proves them to be phony. Never mind that most of them have been independently corroborated, in many cases by Trump appointees and associates. William Saletan discusses how much corroboration there has been.
In 1977, the film The Goodbye Girl was a surprise smash hit. It had a screenplay by Neil Simon and its two leads — Marsha Mason and Richard Dreyfuss — were nominated for Academy Awards, as was the film itself. Dreyfuss won his category, becoming at the time the youngest Best Actor in Oscar history. Very much a successful film.
In 1992, it was announced that Mr. Simon was transforming his screenplay into a Broadway musical of the same name. If ever an upcoming show looked like a guaranteed smash, this was it. Just the fact that it was Neil Simon and a beloved storyline sold a lot of tickets. When it was announced that David Zippel and Marvin Hamlisch were doing the music and Michael Kidd was directing, they sold more. And they probably couldn't have found two bigger stars to star than Bernadette Peters and Martin Short.
The advance sale was huge. So were the problems during rehearsals and tryouts. So was the disappointment of many when the show finally opened on March 4, 1993. The previous Neil Simon musical, They're Playing Our Song, ran for 1,082 performances. The Goodbye Girl closed after 188.
How could "the show that couldn't fail" fail? There were many factors and in his autobiography, Mr. Simon blamed everyone but Mr. Simon, implying he thought it was a terrible idea to try to make that movie into a stage musical. He didn't really explain though why he agreed to do it. I mean, it wasn't like he needed the money or the credit.
I saw one of the 188 performances and we somehow got tickets at the last minute…in the front row! I liked parts of it, especially David Zippel's lyrics which I thought were often funnier than what was coming out of the actors' mouths when they weren't singing. Before I explain what I didn't like, give me a sec to put up one of these…
There. Read on at your own risk. Like most musicals, the plot was about two people who shouldn't be together and maybe don't even like each other for most of Act One winding up very much in love. Anna never imagined she'd fall for the King of Siam. Marian the Librarian was repulsed at first by the traveling salesman, Harold Hill. Eliza Doolittle never dreamed she'd care about Henry Higgins…and in The Goodbye Girl, Paula McFadden (Bernadette on stage) never thought she'd have anything but disdain for Martin Short's character, Elliot Garfield.
You know how it's going to end before they even start the overture but you're going to pretend you don't, just as you pretend you don't see the wires that fly Peter Pan around, just as you pretend you don't know the ending of any play you've seen before. Well, with The Goodbye Girl, it was hard to pretend. From the moment he set foot on that stage, Martin Short was so funny and so adorable that you got angry with Bernadette's character for not falling in love with him ten minutes into the play. After fifteen, I wanted to marry him. That she kept treating this hilarious, wondrous guy like crap was more frustrating than amusing.
I also thought the set was confusing and that Short snuck in too many Ed Grimley gestures along with the occasional taste of Jerry Lewis. He made you laugh but as Martin Short, not as Elliot Garfield. I liked him better (but laughed at him less) a few years later in a revival of Little Me. It's not surprising that there have been few revivals of the musical of The Goodbye Girl.
There was one last night. The Musical Theater Guild here in Southern California puts on one-night "concert" performances of musicals that are rarely performed. There's almost no budget, almost no sets or costumes, a three-piece orchestra and precious little rehearsal time. They stage and learn each show in twenty-five hours, which is all Actors Equity will allow for this kind of production. The last one I saw there, which I don't think I wrote about then, was Barnum, which is usually done with a cast of no less than eighteen actors and often more. They did it with eight.
Wendy Rosoff and Will Collyer
They did The Goodbye Girl with thirteen, which is more than enough. Thanks to clever directing by Linda Kerns and standout performances, this shoestring, makeshift, ragtag staging was more enjoyable to me than seeing Bernadette and Martin on the stage of the Marquis Theater on Broadway. All the performers were good but I'm just going to single out Wendy Rosoff (who played Paula), Will Collyer (Elliot) and an amazing young actress, Maya Somers, who played Paula's daughter Lucy. Everyone on stage was carrying scripts and reading from them but Ms. Somers looked at hers less than anyone else. Oh — and there was also an actress named Jenelle Lynn Randall who played Mrs. Crosby and demonstrated a stunning musical comedy voice and, like most of her co-stars, a keen ability to get every laugh they had in the script…and then some.
I think the reason this performance worked for me was that Mr. Collyer acted it and played a guy you didn't want to marry every time he delivered a line. And Ms. Rosoff played her part a bit more human, a bit more conflicted. Obviously, no one can prove it but I think Neil Simon would have been very happy with their interpretation of his words. They convinced me that The Goodbye Girl was, while not a great show, better than I thought it was in 1993. I'd be recommending you rush to see the other performances of it if there were any. Since there aren't, you'll just have to take my word for it.
If you just watched and enjoyed the John Oliver segment, try watching the musical number again but with the Closed Captioning on. It makes some amusing mistakes.
I said less than two weeks ago here that I was waiting for John Oliver's follow-up on the lawsuit that Coal Baron Bob Murray filed against him. Last night, Mr. Oliver came through with it and it did not disappoint.
We're soon to enter an extended period when he and Bill Maher will be on hiatus. I can live without Maher — like him at times, get annoyed by him at others — but John Oliver is doing one of the smartest shows that's ever been on television. Here's the latest example…
One of my favorite political commentators, Kevin Drum, occasionally posts this and it's very good advice…
Donald Trump's tweets are not aimed at you and me, and analyzing them as if they were will lead you badly astray. They are aimed solely at his core supporters in the electorate and the media.
In other words: don't think of them as endlessly outrageous and provocative ("How can he say something like that?!?"). That gets you nowhere because you're starting from the wrong premise. Think of them instead as routine communiques that Trump thinks are necessary to retain his base support. This allows you to analyze their meaning both more accurately and far more interestingly.
And I don't care if she looks annoyed at having her picture taken. I pay for everything she eats except for the occasional mouse. She can damn well earn her keep here as a model…
I'm posting this via cellphone because my beloved Internet is out. And of course, one of the main benefits of "bundling" services is that when your web connection is out, so is your TV, telephones and for some bizarre reason, also your downstairs toilet. Maybe the toilet's a separate matter.
Anyway, my ISP has no idea when these services will be restored. A nice lady on the phone told me that a lot of their repair personnel is out trying to fix things in areas being affected by brush fires. Brush fires, by the way, are now more plentiful in Southern California than Whole Foods Markets. And somewhat less expensive.
I'll be back when I'm back…and not a moment before.
