I Put My Hand In

Rumor has it that today, it will be announced that a major revival of Hello, Dolly! is heading for Broadway with Bette Midler as the matchmaking Mrs. Levi. That could be a great rendition of that musical but you know what? I'd rather see Bette Midler as Bette Midler. To me, Hello, Dolly! is a few great songs, a plot that no one ever cares about and (usually) a lot of staging tricks.

Oh, yeah — and a great female star/legend in the lead. I guess they've got that but couldn't she just come out on a stage, sing "Before the Parade Passes By," have a chorus sing the title song to her and then do her Vegas act?

I also think someone should take Barbra Streisand into a studio with a green screen, have her act out all the scenes from the movie and then digitally insert that video into the film in place of her original performance. She's just about the right age now to play it.