We have a sudden flurry of articles pointing out that no one really benefits from or wants Daylight Saving Time. Here's a feature John Oliver's show did about it last night.
I have the feeling we're about to see some politician score a lot of points by leading the charge to rid us of this practice.
I understand people being Catholic and I understand people being in favor of the Death Penalty. I am neither (though I was once the latter) and I respect those choices and do not think anyone is a bad person for having made them.
What I don't get is folks who claim to be devout Catholics but who think that the Catholic church's opposition to the Death Penalty is just for show and not meant to be taken seriously. For years, I have watched Pat Buchanan make this case and it never does not stink of hypocrisy. Abortion is bad, he says, because his church says it is and The Pope is, after all, infallible on such matters. But when the same church and the same Pope say the same thing about the Death Penalty they (a) really don't mean it and (b) especially don't mean it because the person receiving the Death Penalty has taken an innocent life and no one is ever wrongly convicted of that.
So The Pope is infallible except when we aren't supposed to listen to what he says…or something like that. And the courts do not sentence someone to Death Row unless that person deserves to die and pay no attention to those DNA-testing exonerations because, well, just don't pay attention to them.
I really don't get this. Here's an article about this but mainly about how race seems to impact which Catholics do the Pat Buchanan Dance on this topic.
Jan's Restaurant is closing. It's over on Beverly Boulevard a block east of La Cienega here in Los Angeles but it won't be there a week from now. Some time after it closes, the building will be torn down and a new Chipotle Restaurant will be erected, fulfilling a vital need. My God, how can we have three square blocks of this city without a Chipotle? Next thing you know, they'll be opening them inside Starbucks.
I used to live a block from Jan's and I ate there once or twice a week. Once I stopped living a block from Jan's, I still ate there, only once or twice a month. Sorry, Chipotle. I've seen your menu and you won't be getting a dime of business outta me.
Jan's advertised themselves as "L.A.'s Best Coffee Shop," which I only took to mean that the two other coffee shops owned by the same guy weren't as good. Compared to coffee shops that had other owners, it didn't stack up badly. Jan's served great breakfasts, great hamburgers, decent homemade soups and, best of all, they had one of those vertical pie cases up front near the register so if you had to wait for a table, you could stand there and watch pies revolve.
One time, I took a lady friend there and she ordered eggs and sausage. The menu said "Any style" and she told our server she wanted them — and I quote — "basted in water." Our server said, "I'll check and see if the chef knows how to do that." She went off and came back and told us the chef didn't know how to do that.
My friend was shocked. "How," she asked me and the gods, "can a professional chef not know how to make eggs basted in water?" She went over to where he worked and tried to explain it to him. You start like you're going to fry the egg sunny-side-up and then you drizzle a tablespoon of water on it, cover the pan and let it cook for 2-3 minutes, creating an egg that's sort of poached and sort of fried.
The chef listened politely to her lesson and then said, sounding way too much like Peter Falk for his own good, "Hey, lady, I'm sure with the right cook, it would be a work of art. But I'm only cooking here because I'm not classy enough to eat here. And no matter how I cook an egg, it comes out scrambled. Life's like that sometime."
She returned to our table and ordered her eggs scrambled…and sure enough, they came out scrambled. The man did not lie.
I'm going to miss Jan's. There was nothing remarkable about it but for its general dependability. Still, it served me well and fed me well and I spent some great hours there talking with friends after the ultra-efficient bus boys had cleared the dishes away. You can do that at any restaurant, I suppose, but I liked to do it at Jan's. Life's like that sometime. And what the hell am I doing up at this hour?
My TiVo thinks tonight's episode of Last Week Tonight is a rerun so it wasn't going to record it. But it's a new episode so I just told my TiVo it was wrong and ordered it to record the show. It tried to argue but I showed it who's boss around here.
I have crickets in my house. Well, maybe I should say "had" crickets in my house because I seem to be getting rid of them.
At first, I tried getting them out in a humane manner but I couldn't figure out how to do that. I tried scooping them up on a piece of paper so I could put them out a door or window but they just hop right off the paper. I could have started squishing them but that seemed cruel. They weren't harming anything…just distracting me by hopping through my kitchen or hunkering down in some bathroom to make their not-unpleasant noise. At times in there, I've felt like a bear doing you-know-what in the woods.
I also get a lot of spiders in here and some of them look like if they bit me, I would probably not gain the proportionate strength of a spider and then figure out how to make a web shooter device that shoots webs out of my wrists that are strong enough to swing from building to building on and which then dissolve without a trace. (I always wondered why Peter Parker had so many problems when he'd invented something he probably could have sold for millions of dollars.)
Anyway, I decided I needed to find a way to remove crickets, spiders and perhaps other occasional creatures from my premises without gooshing them so I bought one of these…
There are several similar devices from different makers out there to choose from and I have no experience with any of them. I just tried this one because it looked simple and because their ads say, "You will be pleased with the sucking results!" How do you not respond to a slogan like that?
It's called the Bug Vacuum by One Kubed Designs and it sells for $24.00. It runs on one 9 volt battery and it has two buttons on it. One puts out a little blacklight LED glow to enable you to find the bugs. The other turns on a little vacuum that sucks the bugs into a tube. I've found the light to be fairly useless but the rest of it works as advertised, at least on crickets and spiders. I'm skeptical it has enough power to budge a large cockroach but fortunately, I haven't had to test that out yet.
When I see a cricket or spider, I grab my Bug Vacuum and suck them up into the tube. You can cork the end of the tube (a plug is included) or put your hand over the end but I've found that if I just point it upwards, the bug stays in the tube long enough for me to take it outside and release it unharmed.
That's all it does but that's all I wanted it to do. Well, actually, I'd like a larger model which will work on people who come to my door and try to convince me that my life is meaningless and that I'm going to hell unless I instantly convert to their religion and donate money. Them, I may have to start stepping on…and believe me, I've got the feet to do it.
Why do we have Daylight Saving Time? According to this article, most of what we believe about it is not true.
But we have it so remember to set your clocks ahead tonight. My thanks to Steve Stoliar for suggesting this clip that shows you how to do this…
The 2015 Tony Award Ceremony will be broadcast live on CBS from Radio City Music Hall in New York on June 7. Who's hosting? Usually, this would have been announced months ago but it hasn't been yet. My deduction? They're waiting to see if Neil Patrick Harris can work it into his schedule. Given the mixed reaction he got to his Oscar hosting, he may decide he needs to remind people how good he is at that kind of thing. The Tony Awards are more "his room" and he's a lot more in control on those telecasts.
So now Samantha Bee is departing The Daily Show. I see a lot of speculation that all these departures were triggered by Jon Stewart's announcement that he would soon leave the host chair but Bee's deal, as well as the one involving her husband Jason Jones, had to have been in the works for some time. One wonders how long all these folks knew about Stewart stepping down before we knew about Stewart stepping down. I have the feeling that when Mr. Stewart made that announcement, he knew exactly who'd be taking over his chair — or at least knew of a short list of feasible, gettable replacements — and that he didn't make that announcement until he was confident there was someone who could keep the ship afloat.
I try from time to time but I still find Jimmy Kimmel unwatchable as a talk show host. Still, I admit his show's attacks on the anti-vax mob are very clever and probably effective.
Incidentally, last night Kimmel reran a show from February 25 where his lead guest was Will Smith while Jimmy Fallon reran a show from February 5 where his lead guest was Will Smith. David Letterman got a one-day jump on both of them. He reran his February 18 show with lead guest Will Smith the night before.
There's a probably-apocryphal story from back in the early seventies when there were four major late night talk shows, all emanating from New York: Merv Griffin's on CBS, Johnny Carson's on NBC, Dick Cavett's on ABC and David Frost's in syndication. The story is that thanks to staggered taping schedules, Jerry Lewis — who presumably had something to plug — managed to guest on all four on the same night.
I don't think that happened. I suspect Jerry did all four on one New York trip and they all aired close enough to one another that it was easily exaggerated into the same night. But Will Smith got on all three 11:30 network shows over three weeks and they all got rerun over two days. That's darn close to what Mr. Lewis is said to have accomplished.
I buy cleaning supplies for my home a year or so at a time. Yesterday, I decide it's time…and my car could also use fueling and washing. So I get the car fueled and washed, then I drive it to a shopping center, taking a ticket on my way into the lot. I park my car. I go into a Target store there. I select Lysol and generic Windex and Swiffer refills and laundry detergent and Oxi-Clean and trash bags and many other items. I push my cart up to a checkout lane where a cheery checker asks, "Do you need a parking validation?" I do…so I reach into my pocket to get my ticket —
— and it isn't there. The ticket, not my pocket.
Figuring it fell out when I pulled my shopping list out of that very pocket, I backtrack and search the aisles. I do not find it. I ask a lady who's stocking shelves in that area if she saw a lost parking ticket. She says no, then pulls out a walkie-talkie and calls the Customer Service desk and asks them if someone has turned one in. They check and tell her yes. Ah!
I walk over to the Customer Service desk and they tell me, yes, someone did turn in a lost parking ticket…a few days ago. The ticket is dated March 3. I figure out rather quickly that it is not mine and that a two-hour validation on it won't be of much help.
Well, I think, maybe mine is in my car or near it. I pay for my purchases and head for my car where, it turns out, there is no sign of the ticket. I load everything I bought into the trunk and then, Target receipt in hand, head for the Parking Office of this lot. I explain the situation and an attendant tells me that since I lost my ticket, I must pay full price, as if I've parked there all day. Full price is $10.00, which is ten bucks more than I'd pay if I had my ticket and it had been validated.
I explain to the gentleman that I just spent $251.00 at the Target store and show him my receipt. Doesn't that deserve a little consideration? Yes, it does. He considers it and tells me that since I lost my ticket, I must pay full price, as if I've parked there all day. "That will be ten dollars," he tells me.
I explain I have not been there all day. I have been there less than an hour. He tells me that this may be so but he has no proof of that. I ask him, "If I could prove I've been here less than an hour, would you let me go without paying?" He says he would but, of course, there is no conceivable way to prove this.
I pull out my receipt from the car wash and show him that it is time-stamped 55 minutes before. It also has my car's license plate info printed on it. "As you can see," I tell him, "I was in a car wash having this car washed 55 minutes ago. The car wash is five to ten minutes away from here so the longest I could possibly have been here is 50 minutes." I tell him he can come with me up to the third parking level if he doubts me to check my car's license plate and its cleanliness.
The man, well aware he has just been Perry Masoned to within an inch of his life, thinks for a moment, then tells me I will have to talk to his boss. He phones this person to come over from another office. In five minutes, I am explaining the whole matter to the boss.
I say, "I'm a very good customer, the kind you want to encourage to come back to this shopping center and shop. I just spent $251.00 at the Target store. Why don't you just let me exit for the price I would be paying if I hadn't lost my ticket, which is zero?"
The boss mulls it over for a few moments, then tells me that since I lost my ticket, I must pay full price, as if I've parked there all day. "That will be ten dollars," he tells me.
I sigh. I am reaching for my wallet when he looks again at the receipt from the car wash. He asks, "What is MAGNOR?" I tell him that's my license plate.
He says, "I remember a comic book called Magnor. It was done by the guys who do Groo the Wanderer."
In 1993, Sergio Aragonés and I were far enough ahead on Groo that we did a mini-series about a super-hero we named Magnor. At about the same time, and certainly not because of what I was paid on Magnor, I bought a new car. On a whim, and figuring wrongly that Magnor would be around for a long time, I got that as my personalized license plate. Many thousands of miles later when I traded in that car and got a new one, I transferred the plate over and it adorns the auto I now drive.
The comic has been outta print for a long time, although it's scheduled for a hardcover collection (and maybe a new sequel) next year. Since it was last published, I have spent much of my life explaining to people in parking lots who ask what "Magnor" is. Standing there in the lot of this particular shopping center, I am amazed. I have found the one person alive, with the possible but not probable exception of Sergio, who remembers that comic.
I tell him I am indeed one of the guys who does Groo the Wanderer. He is delighted to meet me and to tell me he has "almost every issue of Groo" and for some reason, he also feels the need to tell me that though he loves Groo, his favorite comic book is DC's Secret Six by Gail Simone. He spends a considerable amount of time telling me how wonderful it is.
Attention, Gail Simone: I will send you the location of this shopping center. If you ever go there and lose your parking ticket, do not panic. The parking lot boss not only will not charge you full price, he may even give you your choice of any car in the place.
What he gives me is a free ticket to get out. Some days are better than others and this, my friends, was one of them. Ten bucks is ten bucks and by saving it, I think I just doubled my lifetime income from the Magnor comic book.
Once I admitted the Batman serial photo I posted was from the 1949 sequel instead of the 1943 original, I unleashed another wave of correcting e-mails. These all point out that that means the two men in the photo were not Lewis Wilson and Douglas Croft but were, in fact. Robert Lowery and Johnny Duncan. So I've swapped out that photo for one that's from the '43 version. Happy now?
The still I posted of Lewis Wilson and Douglas Croft as Batman and Robin was from the 1949 sequel, not from the 1943 Batman serial. That's what I get for having Bill O'Reilly as my researcher.
Here are videos of the demolitions of ten Las Vegas hotels. I was present for the toppling of the Hacienda and I wrote about that casino-shattering event here.
Don't you love the fact that for some, the crew felt it was necessary to add some fireworks? Somebody said, "You know, Harry, seeing a fifteen story building engulfed in flame and crumbling to the ground…I just feel like it needs something to make it feel more exciting…"
So…what happens when the copyright on Mein Kampf expires, apart from Pat Buchanan no longer having to worry about being sued for infringement? This article will tell you.
Those who question why it took so long for some of Bill Cosby's many accusers to come forward might want to read an essay by one of those ladies. Jewel Allison is black and had to struggle with all the problems that white rape victims have to deal with, plus there was the question of whether it would hurt the black community to hurt Mr. Cosby.
To be a fan of Superman or Batman or most of the "major" comic book heroes is to endure long stretches of their comic books where you think the stories suck and you wonder if the folks in charge know anything about the character they're despoiling. You also have to ignore (or if you're smart, avoid) some of the adaptations of the character into other media.
In 1943, Columbia Pictures produced a 15-episode serial called Batman, featuring the then-new star of DC Comics. Lewis Wilson and Douglas Croft starred as Batman and Robin. If you love those characters, it's a good adaptation to avoid…or maybe not. It was, after all, the first screen depiction of the Caped Crusader and the Boy Wonder. It's also not a bad serial for its era and not a bad example of "high camp" for the sixties, when this thing was exhibited in movie theaters and inspired the Adam West series, which to some extent was a parody of this. Also, a few elements of it — like Batman having his Bat Cave — soon made it into the comics.
Beginning this Saturday morning, Turner Classic Movies is running one chapter a week — consult your schedule for the precise time. I doubt anyone will watch all fifteen chapters but you might want to check out the first one. It doesn't get any better than that (or any more racially-sensitive) but it probably doesn't get any worse.