As I've mentioned here before, I somehow got on a list that is sold to building contractors. It's a list that purports to be of people who — and I have no idea how they claim to determine this — need construction work done on their homes. I do not need any construction work on my home and if I did, I have a great contractor who I'd call in to do it. Nevertheless, I get between five and ten calls a week from contractors yearning for customers.
In some cases, I believe the person phoning me is an actual contractor. In others, I suspect it's someone who was desperate for employment (there are such people these days) and who answered an ad somewhere that said they could make hundreds of bucks a day. They're then handed a hunk of this list and trained to call folks on it and try to drum up business…and if their calls result in sales, they'll receive a commission that might yield hundreds a day but probably won't. I feel kinda sorry for these people but not sorry enough to not be annoyed by the calls. The approaches fall into three categories…
- The Honest Approach: "Hello, Mr. Evanier. Sorry to bother you but I'm Stan Shmendrake of Shmendrake Construction. I'm wondering if you're in need of any construction or repairs on your home at this time."
- The Semi-Honest Approach: "Hello, Mr. Evanier. I'm calling on behalf of Shmendrake Construction. We're doing some work on a home in your area and one of your neighbors told us you might be in need of some construction or repair work."
- The Outright Lying Approach: "Mark, hi. This is Stan with Shmendrake Construction. You may remember we spoke last August about that construction work you want to do on your home and you told me to give you a call around now and you might be ready."
I usually respond to the last of these by saying, "You're lying. We never spoke about any construction work and if I need any, I have a contractor." On Wednesday, I said exactly that to a caller who hoped to convince me I'd promised he could handle my planned renovations. He was a persistent cuss and he came back and said, "Well, how about giving us a chance to bid on your next job? It won't cost you anything and we just might be able to beat his price and save you a lot of money."
My response? "Why would I want to give a construction job to someone who began our relationship by lying to me?"
That didn't get rid of him, either. Instead he said, "May I just ask…what are you planning to do to your home?"
I decided to lie back at him. I have no attic and I already have a two-car garage so I said, "Well, if you must know, I'm going to have my contractor refinish my attic and expand my one-car garage to a two-car garage." Then I ended the conversation. That was Wednesday.
About an hour ago, I got a call…
"Mark, hi. This is Phil with Frazblatt Construction. We spoke last October and you told me you'd be ready soon to have someone refinish your attic and expand your one-car garage into a two-car garage and I should give you a call about now to come over and give you an estimate."