Fred Kaplan has more on the situation in Afghanistan. I wonder if a pollster went out and asked average Americans why we're in that war, what percentage would be able to cite a coherent reason. I'm guessing the low single digits.
Monthly Archives: March 2012
Hart Murmurs
R.C. Harvey has written a very good, long profile of the late cartoonist, Johnny Hart, who gave us B.C. and (with Brant Parker) The Wizard of Id. I always found his strips funny, though maybe less funny when he got preachy and (I thought) contemptuous of faiths other than his own.
I do think though it was always a matter of funny, not blasphemy. If anything in this world oughta have a "thick skin," it's a religion. Whatever your belief system is, it doesn't speak well for it that you think it can be harmed in the slightest by one guy drawing a comic strip. It's like people who think that if you burn its flag, you're somehow damaging the United States of America. Really? You think the nation's that frail? That its inherent truths don't make it immune to mosquito bites?
Today's Video Link
I've been watching episodes of this PBS show — InnerVIEWS with Ernie Manouse — on YouTube. He's a pretty good interrogator and gets pretty good guests and lets them talk. Here's a half hour with Lewis Black…
Late Breaking Jerry News
So according to Jerry Lewis, his musical version of The Nutty Professor is going to open on Broadway on November 15. Kathleen Marshal, they're saying, is going to choreograph, which raises two questions…
One is whether Ms. Marshal, who has also done some directing, is in to be more than the choreographer. It takes a lot of expertise to direct a Broadway show and apart from his time in a revival of Damn Yankees and the aborted Hellzapoppin' flop, Jerry hasn't even logged a lot of miles on the legit stage as a performer, let alone as a director. Mel Brooks, who's the same age as Jerry and has directed a lot of funny films, didn't feel qualified to direct the stage versions of two of those movies. You'd kinda think Jerry would need a co-director, billed or unbilled, with some experience in putting on a musical…preferably someone under 80.
And here's the other question: How could Kathleen Marshal possibly choreograph a Broadway show that's opening on November 15? She's directing and choreographing the musical version of the movie Diner and it plays a tryout engagement in San Francisco from October 23 through November 18 with an expected opening in New York in Spring of '13. See here.
But in spite of this, I'm more inclined to shift my thinking and to believe The Nutty Professor might just happen…maybe not by 11/15/12 but someday. They may not have a theater yet but they've had a runthrough and they have a website. That's a start. Thanks to Vinnie Favale and Josh Curtis for telling me about the Diner conflict.
From the E-Mailbag…
Douglas McEwan is a friend of Barry Humphries and has this to say about the reports I cited about Barry touring for the last time as Dame Edna Everage…
Barry's retirement from the stage is no joke. The "First Last Tour" title was a joke; this isn't. Part of the misunderstanding (apart form the basic cynicism that no longer believes it when celebrities announce retirements) arises from people incorrectly stating that Barry is retiring. He's not. He's just retiring from live stage shows and touring.
He's going to do one last Australian tour this summer. It's all booked. If it's successful (and how could it not be?) he will bring it to London and then to Broadway, where, not lumbered this time with the creepy Michael Feinstein, he should again receive the welcome he deserves, especially as that will be the final engagement in an amazing 57 year stage career of astounding international success. For we in Los Angeles, The First Last Tour was indeed his final appearance on our local stages. Even if I have to sell my signed first editions to finance it, I will be there for that last engagement.
And then, that's it. No more live stage shows, no more tours, ever. Bear in mind that by the time he closes that show on Broadway, he'll be 79 years old, or "80-1". Touring is arduous and grueling hard work, even if you're just a 25 year old member of the chorus of a show. Barry is the whole show. I have no idea how he has found the stamina, energy, and strength to do it as long as he did.
But Barry is not fully retiring. He won't be off keeping bees on the Sussex Downs. He will go on writing books, and doing TV appearances. (Though a new TV series from him is highly doubtful.) He has said that Sandy Stone and Sir Les Patterson will not be heard from again after this tour. (Not that those characters have ever played our L.A. stages, though I begged him more than once to bring a show here that included them.), but that Dame Edna will live on in TV guest appearances. And he will still be painting. Lots of painting. Given what his paintings sell for, that's not a hobby, it's another line of his professional activities.
It's a sad thing, but we need to face reality, as he finally has. A man of 80 can not sing and dance and tell jokes on stage night after night after night, and then pack up and move on to the next town and do it all again, not to mention the ancillary publicity work: TV appearances, radio appearances, interviews, events, for month after month.
I'll miss him terribly, but he has earned his rest, and some time to savor what life he has left without arduous touring. Not every actor wants to pull a David Burns, and die onstage. Touring a Dame Edna show at 80 would do just that.
Yeah, I do have a natural cynicism when performers "retire" — and at least 85% of the time I'm right that they won't keep away from the stage or spotlight. But it's encouraging that he's only planning to retire from touring, not from performing at all. That, I could believe.
I hope some outfit like HBO or Showtime will record his current show and then I'd like to see them hire Mr. Humphries to do a special or two per year. He needs not just a live audience but the kind of live audience that would turn out to see a Dame Edna show, and he needs time. I was never that impressed when he'd come on and do eight minutes with Leno. Some performers simply don't work on someone else's turf and with time constraints. (Sam Kinison was another. Given 6-10 minutes on a show that wasn't his, I thought he was a bore. But give him 40+ on a stage he could make his own and he was brilliant.)
Sorry to hear that Ms. Everage won't be coming to L.A. on this final final tour. I'd like to think you're wrong about that but you probably aren't. Oh, well. I'm way overdue for a trip back to New York and a week of showgoing.
Great Photos of Stan Laurel and/or Oliver Hardy
Number one hundred and eighty-four in a series…
Jerry News
J. Hoberman reports on a recent New York appearance by Jerry Lewis that sounds a lot like the one I attended in Beverly Hills a few weeks ago. It includes the odd remark that Lewis is "the most cerebral Hollywood funny man since Buster Keaton." "Cerebral?" I can't think of any sense in which that is so. In fact, it seems to me the main artery of Jer's appeal is how he is so much the opposite of "cerebral." But okay.
Jerry said at the event that the long-heralded Broadway musical of The Nutty Professor will open November 15 of this year, which would be a good indicator that it's going forward if they also have a theater booked. Giving them the benefit of the doubt, perhaps they do and the show currently playing there doesn't want its termination to be announced just yet. Or perhaps this is like the announcement that the show was definitely going to debut in New York in 2009, was definitely going to debut in New York in 2010 and was definitely going to debut in New York in 2011.
Jerry will direct, Michael Andrew will star, Kathleen Marshall (who choreographed the recent revivals of Anything Goes and Pajama Game) will do the dances, Marvin Hamlisch is supplying the score and Rupert Holmes has written the book.
I've decided to strike a note of guarded optimism about this one; not that it'll be a hit — I have no idea — but that it'll ever happen. I know there are those who think that at age 86, Jerry Lewis is too old to direct a Broadway musical but hey, George Abbott directed a show at the age of 96. Then again, that was Mr. Abbott's 35th and final directing job on Broadway and Mr. Lewis is looking at his first…
Today's Video Link
Jack Benny and Mel Blanc not doing the "See? Si!" routine…
Behind the Golden Arches
A number of current and recent McDonald's employees have written to me since last night to say that my trick — ordering a quarter-pounder without cheese in order to get a freshly-made burger — wouldn't work at their establishments. One wrote — and he didn't ask me to withhold his name but I will anyway, just in case —
The burgers are all cooked en masse on the grill — regular burgers on one grill, quarter pounders and Angus patties on another, and grilled chicken on yet another. They are cooked double-sized with a heated press (the chicken have a special press spout in which water is poured). Afterwards, they are scooped up and kept in warming trays for up to an hour. Once a customer makes an order, the bun is toasted, a burger is taken from its tray and the sandwich assembled to customer specs. The only time a sandwich is made fresh off the grill is if someone actually specifies they want it fresh off the grill.
But other employees have told me it does work in their outlets. Maybe I've just gotten lucky. One did suggest I just ask for a freshly-made burger and I guess I could do that. My main point was that McDonald's burgers are a lot better when they're right from the grill. One current employee wrote…
Most people have never had a McDonald's burger that was cooked less than 10 or 15 minutes ago. We're always making them but we're also always ahead of supply and demand. At least in our store, there are always pre-made burgers ready to serve and if it looks like the supply may run out, we quickly make more to replenish that supply before it's out. The burgers that come off the grill are almost never given to customers right away. The only time I've seen that happen is if someone walks in and orders 50 hamburgers at once and wipes out our supply. That does happen once in a while. The customers after that customer will probably get freshly cooked and assembled hamburgers.
As I said, I don't give a lot of my business to McDonald's these days. I never really did. But when I fly, it always seems to come down to them, Burger King or Sbarro in an airport situation. Given that choice, I'll take McDonald's or, better still, hunger. Sbarro is to Italian food what Sbarro is to Italian food.
I must admit that I don't understand the commerce at airports at all. Like, I've never grasped why there seems to be a thriving industry selling luggage there. It seems to me that the only reason to buy anything at an airport, where prices are higher and it's more awkward to carry your purchases off, is if you need that item now. Doesn't everyone who goes to the airport already own enough suitcases to travel? Of what use is a new suitcase to them there?
Since 9/11 and the need to arrive earlier for flights, there's probably more dining taking place at airports. I see new upscale, sit-down places with servers — some pretty decent restaurants, in fact — but it seems to me the low-end options are getting worse and there's not much in the middle. For me, it always turns into a choice of someplace that takes an hour to eat (not always possible) and someplace where you get your food in three minutes in a paper bag.
Right near LAX, there's an In-N-Out Burger that is said to be one of the most lucrative outlets of any fast food chain in the country. It feeds a lot of limo and cab drivers, and there are outta-towners who get into L.A. and seize their first opportunity to eat at In-N-Out — a luxury that is not possible where they come from. (That is, it's a luxury for them. I've lost my taste for In-N-Out, which for a native Angeleno is like renouncing cars.) But I also think that particular In-N-Out does a lot of business because if you're heading for certain airport terminals, it's your last chance to grab a quick meal you won't regret. I'm surprised most airports aren't surrounded with drive-thru stands that operate on that principle.
Recommended Reading
Robert Reich on the latest Paul Ryan budget/tax plan. It's allegedly a road map for tackling the deficit but not really. Instead, Reich says it slashes benefits and safety net protections for the poor and the elderly and redistributes that money to the wealthy. How nice.
Great Photos of Stan Laurel and/or Oliver Hardy
Number one hundred and eighty-three in a series…
Recommended Reading
People keep talking about the possibility of a "brokered convention" for the Republicans. They probably mean "deadlocked" unless they have some specific ideas as to who the "brokers" would be. Jeff Greenfield thinks that if it happens, it may be because someone managed to ram through a rule change as to how the delegates are counted.
That would have great entertainment value but I doubt it'll happen. Now more than ever, I think the nominee's going to be Mitt Romney. What's more, I'll predict — without as much confidence as to this part — that he will arrive at the convention with enough delegates that a rule change would look like out-and-out cheating. He will lock the nomination up on June 26 when he wins Utah. And then soon after that, he will announce his pick for a running mate. I'm thinking he'll try to balance the ticket by selecting someone with a firm opinion on something.
The King is Dead!
Says here, Wendy's has dethroned Burger King as the second-highest grossing fast food burger chain. McDonald's, of course, is Numero Uno. Five Guys, my fave, is the fastest-growing chain.
I don't eat a lot of fast food these days. Even Five Guys only gets my business about twice a month. But I have to say I've never cared for anything at a Burger King — not their burgers, not their fries, not their Chicken Tenders…I suppose the bottled water is passable. In the past, I've occasionally been famished at an airport and a Burger King seemed to be the only option. In the future, I think I'll remain famished.
By the way: I don't mind McDonald's, especially because I've found a way to get a much better burger than usual there. Go up and ask for a Quarter-Pounder without cheese. They usually have Quarter-Pounders with cheese all pre-made and ready to go but if you ask for one sans cheese, they have to make it up special. You usually wind up getting a burger right off the grill as opposed to one that's been sitting around for 10-15 minutes, and they're much tastier when fresh. (Of course, it helps that I don't like cheese on hamburgers…)
Today's Video Link
I've posted a number of Liza Minnelli impressions here. Here's the real thing at one of those hourly Sondheim tribute concerts…
Grand Dame
According to this article, actor Barry Humphries will retire his popular character, Dame Edna Everage — and apparently, himself — when he completes his current stage tour. I'm a bit skeptical of this but if he/she comes your way, go see him/her.
He/she (as you can tell, I'm still having what Daffy Duck calls "pronoun trouble") came my way in June of '09 with something called the "First Last Tour." Dame Edna fans, and they are many, thought it might indeed be a farewell because for the first time ever, he ended his show by coming out on stage for a final bow as Barry Humphries. Like I said, I have the feeling Humphries will milk this more-real farewell for all it's worth and cover a lot of ground with it…but you can't go wrong spending an evening with Dame Edna. Unless he/she picks on you/you.