March is Creamy Tomato Soup month at your local Souplantation or Sweet Tomatoes. I like this soup a lot and regret that they only have it for the month of March plus one week in October…so guess where I'll be dining often during the next thirty days. If you would like to try it, you can find out if there's a Souplantation or Sweet Tomatoes in your neck of the woods on this page…and while you're there, check the menu and make sure they have it because it's possible some locations opt out. Some may have it today but most will start tomorrow.
Then go try this soup, guaranteed to give every male a perfect physique! It makes fat men thin! Thin men fat! It removes hair from where you don't want it and puts it where it counts the most! It broadens your shoulders, narrows your hips! It builds up your corpuscles, lowers your blood pressure! Wakes you up in the morning, puts you to sleep at night! It softens your beard, toughens your skin — and what's more it cleans your teeth and leaves your breath alone!
Shore got good manners, don't it?
If you do go there to try it, you might want to print out these coupons (it's a PDF file) which will give you discounts from now through Thursday. You might also want to remember that for all the fuss I make here about it, all it is is good tomato soup. If you go in expecting the nectar of the gods, you'll only be disappointed…but that's true just about everywhere and about everything, isn't it?