Wild and Crazy Juror

stevemartin01

In case you aren't following Steve Martin on Twitter, he's doing jury duty at the moment. Here are some of his more memorable tweets today…

  • REPORT FROM JURY DUTY: defendant looks like a murderer. GUILTY. Waiting for opening remarks.
  • REPORT FROM JURY DUTY: guy I thought was up for murder turns out to be defense attorney. I bet he murdered someone anyway.
  • REPORT FROM JURY DUTY: Prosecuting attorney. Don't like his accent. Serbian? Going with INNOCENT. We're five minutes in.
  • REPORT FROM JURY DUTY: I'm cracking up defense with my jokes. Judge not pleased. Defendant finds me funny. Nice guy!
  • I like to cup my hands and say, "you tell 'em Judge Judy," then duck behind the other jurors." HUGE laughs.
  • REPORT FROM JURY DUTY: Defendant's hair looking very Conan-y today. GUILTY.
  • REPORT FROM JURY DUTY: Attorneys presenting "evidence." Since when are security photos, DNA, and testimony evidence? Trusting intuition.
  • REPORT FROM JURY DUTY: Lunch break. Discussing case with news media gives me chance to promote my book.
  • REPORT FROM JURY DUTY: Now forcing my autograph on other jurors. Also starting whisper campaign of innocence based on Magic 8 Ball.
  • Slipped into evidence blow-up of fingerprint with my face worked into it. Got screams! Judge now banging gavel on my head. Hard to twee