Monthly Archives: July 2009

There's a commercial they run every few seconds on MSNBC for an online backup storage service called Mozy. In it, a lady says the following…

For only $4.95 a month, you get unlimited storage. That's enough space to back up your entire computer.

Uh, isn't "unlimited storage" enough space to back up every computer in the world a trillion times? I mean, it's unlimited, right?

It's been a few months since I put one of these up. I have to replenish my PayPal account with funds…and this isn't even because I've been buying weird stuff on eBay. I just need to dispense some bucks for good causes.

Hayao Miyazaki, who is to Japanese anime what Walt Disney was to American animation — an obvious analogy but not a bad one — will make a rare appearance at the Comic-Con International in San Diego. The New York Times has an article about this…and even quotes me.

Among the most popular things we offer at this site are three columns that I wrote about what I call "Unfinanced Entrepreneurs." Basically, these are folks who want to hire you to write or draw things and you'll get paid much later, if at all. The first of these columns can be read here and then that link will lead you to the others.

Writers and artists are always being nudged, coerced, conned, shoved or otherwise trampled into providing their services for future money and/or low money, too much of which turns out to be nonexistent money. In some cases, they may be persuaded (or may persuade themselves) that it's bad for the soul to be too militant about being compensated; that a True Artist creates for the joy of creation and that you don't want to be the mercenary kind of creator, or have anyone think you're of that bent. We have a name for people who think that way…

We call them chumps. And usually, they're chumps who subsist in a constant struggle to make their rent payments or stop their bank from sending "the boys" over to surgically remove a Visa card. General rule of thumb: You're not going to write the Great American Novel (or anything) if your electricity's been turned off.

As the economy in our nation gets worse — and as technology makes it easier and easier to look like a publisher or producer while one is sitting at one's computer in one's skivvies — this problem worsens. I dunno how many calls I've gotten lately from writer and artist friends who've been screwed eight ways to Sunday on some recent project. Sometimes, the screwing has been done by companies of great reputation…folks who actually have the money they're not paying. Most of the time though, we're talking about "companies" (note the quotation marks) that are kiting the entire enterprise, hoping they can stall paying you until your work makes them a profit and then they can pay you out of those profits.

And when they don't make profits — or don't make enough to pay themselves and you — guess who doesn't get paid.

I'm probably repeating some of the things I said in those columns but they bear repeating. If you want to write and/or draw, it's easy to lead with your heart. You want to create things. You want them to be published or produced. You see others making nice livings doing what you think you should be doing. So when someone comes along who says, "I can publish [or produce] your work," you want to believe it's all going to work for everyone's benefit.

Waaaay too often, it does not. You need to develop a nose for opportunities to work for nothing. You need to be able to sniff out the ones who have zero or close to zero chance of actually getting the book published, getting the movie made, getting your work before the public. And within the tiny subset of those who actually have the resources, knowledge and funding to get the book or movie out, there's a tinier subset of entrepreneurs who will actually cut you a check that will clear. I've been fortunate enough that in the forty (My God) years I've been a freelance writer, I've made a good living and usually managed to avoid the eels. But I've been duped or swindled at times, many of which were instances where I just plain shoulda known better.

I mention all this because first of all, we all need that constant reminder. If you think you're creating something of value, treat it as something of value. No one else will if you don't. That means insisting on being paid that value and not in hypothetical, down-the-road bucks. There are times when it makes sense to invest but when you do, you have to think a little like an investment banker. Their success is 100% contingent on knowing which stocks are good gambles and recognizing that many are not.

I also mention this because I've been reading the blog of Colleen Doran. Colleen is an artist of exceptional skill and spirit. If I were a publisher in a position to do so, I would hire Colleen and lob large sums of cash at her — in advance! — because the work she would do for me would make me even larger sums of cash. It is appalling that anyone like that is ever wronged by publishers…or that any publisher could be so inept at publishing that they couldn't make money issuing the work of Colleen Doran.

She is courageously blogging about some of her experiences in order to aid others. I don't know the specifics of her encounters but the kind of thing she discusses definitely happens and it happens way too often.

One sound point she makes is that you should never be afraid that by standing up for your rights and refusing to be exploited, you can get a rep as a troublemaker and can somehow be "blacklisted." That does not happen. There is no way a sleazy publisher or producer can do much more than simply decide he or she doesn't want to deal with you again.

This is not a bad thing and can be a very good thing, indeed. In those forty years of writing for dough, the only employers who have ever decided never to deal with me again because I stood up for my rights and contract were folks I wouldn't work for again if they paid me in advance and in cash. I'd probably figure the cash would bounce. There are some where it's just like getting in the snake pit. If you get in, you're going to get bitten and it's your own damn fault. Don't act so surprised when the cobra strikes. That's what they do.

To read Colleen's tales of woe, start here and go forward. And do not get discouraged because it's so bad out there for so many talented folks. Instead, the trick is to feel empowered by knowledge and awareness. Colleen is sharing some of her mistakes with you so you don't have to make them yourself.

I'm getting up entirely too early.

I'm working entirely too late.

In terms of domestic receipts, Titanic is the highest-grossing motion picture of all time, followed closely by The Dark Knight, Star Wars, Shrek 2 and E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial.

Ah, but some of that monetary grandeur is because people flocked to buy tickets and some is because of how much those tickets cost. What would it look like if we adjusted that list to take inflation into account?

It would look a lot like this.

Watching a little of the news coverage of Michael Jackson's funeral, I am reminded of a very sage, brave thing that Andy Richter said on Late Night with Conan O'Brien years ago. It was the evening of the day Sonny Bono was buried and all the networks had preempted soaps 'n' Oprah to bring it all to us live. Andy asked, "When did Sonny Bono turn into Princess Di?" This was Sonny Bono, for God's sake…a guy who the day before his death mattered to the world primarily as a punchline in jokes.

You could make the case, of course, that Bono was a Congressman and a semi-important figure in the history of popular music…but you could make a better case for lots of folks whose funerals went untelevised.

Michael Jackson sold a helluva lot of records…and I'll tell you one great measure of their importance to people. Next time you're in Vegas, try to walk through any casino that plays music and not hear Michael Jackson. They run him incessantly because he's so familiar to the generation that now represents their target audience. But it ain't just the record sales that led to the frenzy that clogs the streets of Los Angeles today. It's that like Sonny (and Cher), we got stuck following the deceased's life — marriages, divorces, comebacks, etc. In Jackson's case, we couldn't turn away from the non-musical stuff, especially when child molestation was alleged. We had to live all that so we might as well be there for the burial.

I gather that the Jackson family was hoping/praying that the big comeback tour would achieve two things; that it would replenish Michael's depleted finances and that it would drown out the tales of pedophilia and bizarre marriages and parenting. It may be small consolation that his death looks to be fulfilling both goals, but I'll bet some of his fans are relieved. Now they can just enjoy the music without worrying what he's going to do next to make them feel embarrassed to love his records.