No Census, No Feelings…

Congresswoman Michele Bachmann is complaining about the Federal Government gathering information about U.S. citizens, suggesting that what you tell the census takers might somehow be used against you. This is the same Michele Bachmann who was a fervent supporter of every wiretapping and domestic spying program that the Bush administration wanted. Apparently, it's fine for the government to listen in and hear everything you and your friends and lovers say to one another…but no one had better ask how many flush toilets you have in your home.

She was just on the news complaining that the government is asking for everyone's phone number. I guess it's okay to tap your telephone just so long as they don't try to call it. Then she asked just what they planned to do with all those phone numbers. I'll tell you, Madame Congresswoman…

They plan to add them all together. Then they'll divide by the total U.S. population. And then, at long last, we will finally know the average American phone number.