I'm hereby announcing a new policy here. Whenever I post or even link to something even vaguely political, I get a slew of e-mails from folks who want to rebut or engage me in long, back-and-forth discussions.
One of the few downsides to doing a blog like this is that it brings a lot of messages…more than you might think and more than I can ever possibly answer. I mean, I suppose I could give up my career and do nothing but respond to e-mail all day but that doesn't seem like the wisest of options. For a time, I answered what I could and moved the rest into a "answer when I get the time" folder…and one day, that folder had more than 2000 messages in it. Obviously, a problem.
This bothers me more than it probably should. It reminds me of one time when I briefly worked on the TV show, MacGyver. One of the show's producers had idly said in a TV Guide interview, "We're always looking for good scripts" and the next thing he knew, there was an entire room at the office filled with "spec" submissions — at least three thousand, one intern estimated.
The studio lawyers wanted none of them read. The following situation is very common: A writer in Idaho submits a script that's set in a bowling alley. Two seasons later, someone on the show has an idea and writes an episode set in a bowling alley. The guy in Idaho sues. That happens an awful lot and it can be very expensive to deal with those threats and lawsuits. It helps a bit to be able to say, "No one here read the submission."
I'm not sure how the MacGyver show eventually dealt with those piles — I didn't get along with the folks there and went elsewhere after a month or so — but I can't imagine what they could have done other than to simply not read many…more likely any of the scripts. Even if the lawyers said it was okay, how do you begin to evaluate three thousand scripts? With more arriving every minute? Even if you could find and hire a couple of extra story editors with the wisdom to find gold amongst the pyrites, how many could those folks read per day and retain any sense of balance? Ten? Fifteen? Do the math. Most were at least fifty pages and I was told that there were some, written by folks who didn't know how long an hour script should be, in excess of 100 or even 200 pages.
The scripts in that little room represented a lot of effort and passion and dreams…and just by the law of averages, there was probably some great, undiscovered talent in there. I just can't imagine how anyone could locate it.
It's not exactly the same situation but my unanswered e-mail situation reminds me of that one. Some very bright folks have written me and received either brief replies or none at all. After mulling the problem a lot, I've decided to deal with it as follows…
First of all, I'm going to ignore all e-mails not signed with what at least looks like a real name. You have every right to be anonymous on the Internet but if you sign yourself "Beefhead" or "Socrates" (two recent correspondents), you should expect your mail to go to the bottom of the stack, never to be seen again. I have my real name on everything here. I don't feel the need to be that courteous to folks who want to not be actually responsible for what they write.
Secondly, I'm going to just delete all the nasty messages — I do, anyway — and thirdly, the ones that seek to alter my entire worldview and debate every aspect of it…well, those require way too much time for a worthy response. I feel the same way about them that I feel about strangers who come to my door and think that a brief chat on my porch will cause me to adopt their religion. You might convince someone of something small that way but there will be no major life conversion and abandonment of everything previously believed.
Those steps will get rid of about half the messages. I'm also going to ignore a number of guys who spent the last few years writing me that George W. Bush would capture Osama, win a glorious and inarguable victory in Iraq and leave the economy in such great shape that America would never again elect a Democrat to anything that did not involve dog-catching. One or two such correspondents have had the class/sense to send apologies and mea culpas but a couple still think their fantasy has almost come true. No point discussing anything with those boys.
That still leaves quite a stack that will have to go unanswered. I'm sorry about that. I don't know what else to do but I do read them and every so often, someone (never an anonymous or hostile person) writes something that causes me to rethink a position or view something in a different light.
Still, please don't spend a lot of energy writing me a message if you'll feel cheated by a lack of response. I have to change my approach to my e-mailbox and treat it less like a collection of communications that, spam aside, etiquette demands I answer. There's no way to do that so I'm just going to try to stop feeling guilty about it. If this sounds unreasonable or arrogant or pigheaded to you…well, fine. Just don't write me as much and expect a reply.