No 'Q

My favorite barbecue empire in my area, Porky's, has closed one of their three locations due to lease problems and high rent. Unfortunately, they closed the one I frequented. They're looking for a new place on the west side but unless and until they find one, I'm making do with lesser (but still pretty good) BBQ. There's still a Porky's in San Pedro and another in Long Beach but I dislike driving long distances a little more than I like great ribs. (I'm not linking to the Porky's website, by the way, because it's not updated to reflect the new addresses…and also I haven't eaten at the remaining locations so I don't feel right in recommending them.)

I mention this because Steve Billnitzer, a reader of this site, took my recommendation and drove to the now-closed location. Fortunately, he had the good sense to Google-map his way to the San Pedro outlet. I'll try to suggest some other rib joints in the coming weeks.

The Latest on Magicjack

Well, it's started working…sort of. I'm going to play with it for a day or two and then write a report for this site. Stay, as they say, tuned.

Go Read It!

Who's the most popular stand-up comedian in the business today? If you'd asked me, I wouldn't have guessed the person so designated in this article. But the case it makes for him is not a far-fetched one.

Could It Be The Magic?

On a whim last week, I ordered me one o' them Magicjacks. This is a new invention that plugs into the USB port of your computer. You then plug any telephone into it and, assuming you have a good cable or DSL Internet connection, it gives you a new phone line complete with a new phone number, voice mail and other features. The Magicjack itself costs about twenty bucks and then you have to pay for phone service. At the moment, the first year is another twenty bucks, though they hustle you to order additional years now and offer big discounts if you do. I just went for the first year. During it, I will receive unlimited calls to the U.S. and Canada, which is quite the bargain.

That is, if the thing ever works.

It doesn't, so far. I get a dial tone but that's about it. When you go to their customer support site, you have to type to a Customer Service rep in "live chat," even though those folks presumably have free unlimited phone service. It takes a long time to get an answer that way and the answer always seems to be either (a) unplug the Magicjack, wait 15 seconds and restart or (b) wait 1-2 hours as they're making fixes on the service. So far, neither has resulted in a functioning Magicjack but I'll try again later.

All may work out fine but right now, I'm at best a guarded optimist. I'm also a little concerned by articles I'm reading online that says the Magicjack software installs all sorts of things on your computer that can be used to spy on you. I need to investigate that further but right now, I'm more interested in seeing if it the device will function properly. I'll let you know what happens.

Desilu Doc

And here's a link to listen to that BBC Radio documentary on the lives of Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz, which I haven't done yet but will when I get the chance. The link probably won't be active for more than a week so listen now…or if you're going to do what I do, which is to capture/download the audio for later listening, do that.

Bawdy House

There was a movie made in '68 called The Night They Raided Minsky's. It's not a great film in some ways. The studio at one point thought it was unreleasable but its producers (Norman Lear and Bud Yorkin) and a film editor named Ralph Rosenblum performed major surgery, somewhat turning it into a different and better movie. I find it enormous fun, especially the star performances by Jason Robards and Norman Wisdom.

Some time in the last decade, it was announced that The Night They Raided Minsky's was being turned into a Broadway-style musical. I thought that was a good idea, especially since they'd be engaging the fine composer, Charles Strouse, who wrote some songs for the movie. Michael Ockrent was announced to direct…but then Ockrent passed away, as did Evan Hunter who was writing the book, and the project floundered. It has recently resurfaced as a new show called simply Minsky's, which is now playing down at the Ahmanson Theater in Los Angeles.

It says it's based on the movie and maybe 4% of it is. It's still about the Minsky's burlesque theater and about the efforts of a local community leader to close the place down…but that's darn near it. Even the roles that Robards and Wisdom played have been eliminated. Now, it's all about Billy Minsky fighting to keep his show open. His opponent is a local city councilman and by a too-contrived coincidence, Minsky happens to be in love with the councilman's daughter and vice-versa.

The art direction of the show is terrific. The staging is great. The dancing and dancers are great. The costumes are wonderful. The cast is mostly excellent, especially Christopher Fitzgerald as Billy Minsky. (Fitzgerald is the gent who was so good playing Igor in the Broadway version of Young Frankenstein. Other folks in the cast you might know include Rachel Dratch, formerly of Saturday Night Live, and George Wendt as the evil city councilman.) The dancing ladies are gorgeous and they don't wear a whole lot of clothing. Here. Take a look…

VIDEO MISSING

So it sounds like a great show, right? Well, you'll notice I haven't mentioned the book, music or lyrics.

I wanted to love this show, really I did. I love the era. I love the traditions and the nexus of old Jew comedians and barely-clad chorus girls. I love Christopher Fitzgerald and most of the members of the cast and I especially love the energy with which they perform the hell out of the material. But I couldn't love the material. The songs are largely forgettable…and I don't mean the next day. I mean by the time one song starts, you've forgotten the one before. (One exception is an Act Two duet by Rachel Dratch and an actor named John Cariani that's everything you wish all the other numbers could be.)

The book by Bob Martin, the man behind The Drowsy Chaperone, is just too full of illogical turns. The councilman's daughter is named Mary (played well by Katharine Leonard) and she wants a man who's, above all, honest. Her ideal guy is Abraham Lincoln but for no visible reason, she falls in love with con-artist Billy Minsky in about nine seconds and the feeling is mutual. She doesn't know he's Billy Minsky, the guy whose business her father is out to shut down. Then later, Minsky does something rotten to her father so to get revenge and find a way to close down the burlesque house, she and dad go undercover as new chorus girls in the show. Why does a woman who values honesty above all else disguise herself and lie about who she is? I dunno. Why does her father go along with this? Because someone thought it would be funny to have George Wendt in drag, I guess. Apparently, a good way for an upstanding moralist to show that a burlesque house is a den of sin is to dress up as a woman and go to work there.

The whole show's full of things like that, making the plot seem awfully forced. Maybe some of it will get fixed. Work is still being done on it as evidenced by the fact that the program book lists a musical number — "I Could Get Used to This" — that is no longer in the proceedings. Minsky's is playing here 'til March 1 and then, the producers have announced, they'll "take a fresh look at the show" but Broadway is definitely in their plans. I'll be surprised if it makes it that far but I've been surprised before.

In fairness, I should admit there are many funny moments and I'll repeat that Christopher Fitzgerald is terrific and that a lot of the dance routines are quite well done. Much of the audience last night, including my friend Carolyn, had a good time. There's an air of fun about the show and it sure tries hard. Like I said, I wanted to love it. I'm sorry I couldn't.

Today's Video Link

Here's a bit of Stooge History. In 1955, the Three Stooges consisted of Larry Fine, Moe Howard and Moe's brother, Shemp Howard. At the time, they were making shorts for Columbia on the lowest-possible budgets. This was usually accomplished by simple chicanery. More than half of the footage in one of these shorts would be lifted from an earlier Stooges film. They'd shoot some new scenes to splice in with the old and create the impression of a new film.

On 11/22/55, Shemp died from a sudden heart attack. After the mourning period, Columbia and the remaining Stooges had to decide how to carry on. At the time, there were four shorts yet to be filmed under the current contract. It would be awkward to bring in a new Stooge for what might be their last four films…and of course, it would be difficult to intersperse old footage that way since Shemp was in most of the old footage. They'd already mapped out the next few films using Shemp clips…so they decided to go ahead and make them anyway.

So four "Shemp" Stooge shorts were filmed after Shemp passed away. Most consisted of old footage and the new scenes were configured so that Shemp didn't do much in them and could keep his face away from the camera. A stand-in named Joe Palma did the honors…and it must have been rough on Moe to have to act with someone playing his recently-deceased brother. The bogus Shemp didn't speak much in the new material. Sometimes, Palma tried to imitate him. Sometimes, old Shemp audio was dubbed in.

The four films were completed and released. When the decision was made to make another batch of Stooges shorts on a new contract, they went ahead and cast a new Third Stooge…Joe Besser. He was later replaced by Joe DeRita.

Ah, but what of Joe Palma, the Unknown Stooge? Mr. Palma actually had a nice career in Hollywood. Soon after his brief turn at Stooging, he hooked up with Jack Lemmon, who was making films for Columbia at the time. For years after, Palma was Lemmon's personal assistant and occasional stand-in, and he usually played a bit part in whatever film Lemmon was making. In Good Neighbor, Sam, Joe Palma is the mailman…who's actually addressed in the film as Mr. Palma. In The Odd Couple, he's the butcher who Felix (Lemmon) pesters to grind him some fresh ground sirloin from which to make meat loaf. He seems to have retired shortly after The Odd Couple and passed away in 1994.

Someone assembled a three minute sampler of Palma's career as a Stooge — scenes from his four films. Since this material was intercut with footage of the real Shemp, the substitution wasn't easy to notice. Take a gander…

Silver and Gold

Nate Silver, who's had a pretty good track record when it comes to predicting elections, has crunched some numbers and come up with his picks for the major Oscar categories. Most of these are in line with Conventional Wisdom…so know that there are a lot of people around who have made the same forecasts without all the statistical analysis that Mr. Silver uses. Personally, I'm sticking with my belief that at least in the acting categories, the winner is the one that Academy members think will give the most passionate acceptance speech. I haven't seen either Milk or The Wrestler so I'm not judging the merits of either performance. But Mickey Rourke would give a more emotional acceptance speech than Sean Penn so Rourke will win.

Recommended Reading

George Skelton explains the budget crisis in California. It pretty much comes down to the Republicans in the legislature believing that their base will punish them for voting to raise taxes…but not for the many disasters that will befall the state if taxes aren't raised.

By the way: To clarify something I said earlier, I didn't think Gray Davis was a very competent or honest governor…but the main reason he was removed from office was that the public was convinced he was mismanaging our finances. Arnold S. especially hammered him for doing things like raising vehicle license fees, which was somehow a sign of gubernatorial incompetence and/or tyranny. Well now, we have pretty much the same mess that was threatened if we didn't oust Davis, and Arnold is even proposing a doubling of vehicle license fees.

I don't think Davis should be brought back or anything. I just think we oughta acknowledge that at least in terms of the state's economy, we're getting exactly what recalling him was supposed to avoid.

Today's Bonus Video Link

If you haven't seen this yet, give it a click. It's only twenty seconds.

Recommended Reading

We don't torture in this country. But apparently we do leave people in little isolation cells for five or more years without ever charging them with anything. Jane Mayer reports.

Babalu Alert

Greg Ehrbar, whose fine book on Disney records you should own, informs me of a documentary that airs later today on BBC2 Radio and sounds interesting. It's called Life with Lucy and Desi. I can't figure out what time it's on right this minute but they usually keep these things online for at least a week for later listening. As soon as there's a link, I'll post it…and some of you may want to tune in live. Personally, I'd rather hear about Ethel and Fred but that's just me.

All He Cares About is Love

Within the Broadway community, one occasionally finds a basic prejudice against performers and writers who are best known for their work on television. Every so often, some producer casts a "TV actor" and noses are quickly elevated. Remarks are made that the show in question is despoiling the grand tradition and standards of the Great White Way by booking someone for their name…someone who is presumed not to have the credentials or chops to trod the sacred boards. If you don't have an extensive background in stage work, you're kind of presumed unworthy until proven otherwise and some people won't even allow you the chance to prove otherwise. Should a complete unknown be cast…well, that's fine. The producers obviously discovered someone of great talent. But hire an actor who used to be on a sitcom or other TV series and clearly they've "sold out" and are pandering to exploit the star's reputation.

I'm not particularly in the Broadway community but I sometimes find myself in those arguments saying things like, "Why don't you wait until the actor actually starts performing the role until you decide they can't do it?" Often, it's a matter of the critic just not knowing. When it was announced that Bebe Neuwirth was going to Broadway in a revival of Damn Yankees, I found myself at a party of stage actors, all of whom were sneering that a "TV actor" had been handed such a plumb role just because she was on Cheers. I informed them that Ms. Neuwirth had done a lot of stage work, including roles on Broadway…but even if she hadn't, so what? If she can do the part (she was terrific in it), what difference would her past credits make?

I'm a big believer in not reviewing work that hasn't even been done yet. I also believe that most people can do more than one thing and it's silly to "type" them forever based on the first thing you knew them for. Steve Allen used to tell the story of being in some South American country in the fifties and being asked who was the number one comedy star on U.S. television. He told them, "Probably Jackie Gleason" and they were startled. People asked, "The bandleader?" because that was the sum and total of his reputation down there. The Honeymooners hadn't been imported but his records had been.

So when I read that someone who's famous for being on TV is going to do a play or musical, I don't race to assume they can't possibly handle it; that some shameless producer has engaged them because, even though their performance may suck, their fame will sell tickets. "Give them a chance," I say. "Maybe they'll be wonderful in the role."

Every so often though, it's really tough to be that open-minded. Jerry Springer playing Billy Flynn in Chicago?

Today's Video Link

I'm not a huge fan of most horror movies but I used to watch them often on TV, largely for the hosts. There are few, if any, these days but we used to have "horror hosts" in this country…men (and occasionally, women) who'd dress up to introduce monster movies and macabre films on local channels, usually late at night.

There were an awful lot of them. Sometimes, they were devout fans of such flicks. Sometimes, the station manager would order one of the local newsmen or announcers to dress up as a ghoul and go introduce movies. Some of them came up with some very creative ways to get you to tune in for the umpteenth rerunning of Man-Made Monster with Lon Chaney Jr.

As I wrote in this article, my favorite in Los Angeles was a gent named Larry Vincent whose screen character was called Seymour. Ever since I posted that on this site, I get one or two e-mails a month from someone who wants to know where they can find video of the Seymour. I have to write back to them and report that if any still exists, it's pretty well hidden. I haven't seen a frame of Seymour footage anywhere since he was on KHJ and KTLA back in the early seventies.

But you can see a lot of other horror hosts in a new documentary that's debuting on DVD this week. It's called American Scary and it was assembled with great love and dedication by John Hudgens and Sandy Clark. I don't think they located any Seymour footage but they did find tons of clips of hosts from across the land, and they tracked down an awful lot of them for interviews, along with folks who were enthusiastic watchers. You can find out more about this great work at this site and you can watch a trailer for it by clicking your mouse a few inches below this paragraph…