Almost no one is paying attention to it — and given what's going on in the world, I can't say I'm surprised — but jury selection commences tomorrow in the retrial of Phil Spector for the murder of actress Lana Clarkson. The new trial is expected to be a near-twin of the first one, except that it's expected to go faster and everyone is hoping for a different verdict.
I just want everyone to know that I'm still planning on going on a killing spree if Spector is acquitted. I'm still white, I'm still financially well-off, I'm still in show business and I'm still in California. You can get away with murder if you qualify in just three of those four categories, as O.J. Simpson famously proved. (Recently, of course, he got cocky and thought he could beat a kidnapping rap.. He forgot he wasn't financially well-off, he was no longer in show business and, most significantly, he wasn't in California. They take their crimes of violence seriously outside my home state).
I don't have the patience to follow the Spector trial day to day. Someone let me know when a verdict is imminent so I can start watching then and also, just in case, prep my list of those I'll be murdering. I'm thinking of adding in the kid who bags groceries at the nearby Ralphs and who likes to put the case of canned cat food on top of the bag of Whole Grain Wheat Thins Crisps.