Monthly Archives: May 2008

I wrote a piece this morning about Memorial Day, mainly about how I respect the hell out of anyone who signs up to put on a uniform and go serve his or her country. One of the small but real pains of the Iraq War — and this was true of the Vietnam conflict, as well — was having criticism of the leaders dismissed by folks who'd ask, disingenuously and dishonestly, "Why do you hate our troops?" I don't think anyone hates the troops, and questioning the wisdom of their mission — and the smarts of those who direct them — is not in any way to denigrate the soldiers or their service. It's a job I don't think I could ever do and I'm glad that some can…and will.

And I think they oughta be paid better and get every possible piece of protective gear, as well as the best medical treatment. As you may know, George W. Bush is threatening to veto a new G.I. Bill that will raise wages and also supply college tuition for veterans who served in the military for at least three years since 9/11. This is a bi-partisan bill, the Senate version of which was sponsored by Jim Webb (a Democrat) and Chuck Hagel (a Republican). It passed with support from members of both parties. I heard Bush's explanation for opposing it, and also a similar explanation from John McCain, and I think they're wrong. I won't lay the silly "Why do you hate our troops?" line on them because I don't believe they do. I just think they're wrong about this bill.

Anyway, I wrote a piece this morning about some of this and it read as very sappy and shallow to me so I didn't post it. I decided instead to save it, reread it later and see if it was still sappy and shallow. It is so here's this post instead.

When last we checked in on the actors' negotiations, the Screen Actors Guild had been unable to reach an agreement with the AMPTP on a new contract, and the other actors' union, AFTRA, had begun bargaining for its new deal. The oft-buzzed expectation was that AFTRA, being a weaker union and one not inclined to fight all that hard, would settle for crummy terms and so would undermine the SAG position.

As things stand today, that script looks to be playing out as anticipated. AFTRA has sent a letter to its members (read it here) that seems to be saying, "Hey, we're working hard for you but this is tough…don't get your hopes up. We may have to give in on some things you don't like." The standout issue would seem to be the studios' demand to remove the rule whereby they must get a performer's okay to use his or her performance in other venues, most notably in online clips. A friend of mine who's closer to the situation than I am explained it this way in an e-mail…

You have a lot of irresistible forces meeting immovable objects on this issue. The producers are saying in effect, "We must have this. We are going to get it. We will keep you on strike until you die of old age if we have to but we are going to get this." The rank and file of the actors are saying, "We will not give you this, no matter how long you keep us on strike." The problem is the union leaderships. The AFTRA leadership is saying, "We will fight this but we will not go on strike." The SAG leadership is saying, "We will fight this even if means going on strike."

And of course, the problem is that here we have AFTRA negotiating before SAG.

There are other concerns on the table. Here's a link to a PDF that SAG has issued to inform its members of what those issues are. The other one most likely to be a strike-causer is the one about jurisdiction over so-called "new media." SAG won't do notably better on DVDs than the other unions have and I can't imagine the producers holding out on the one regarding Force Majeure or the actors going on strike over Product Placement.

Still, this is going to get messy. One possible ugly scenario would begin with AFTRA's board accepting some form of what the producers want regarding the use of clips, perhaps mitigated with some limitations. The proposal already concedes that excerpts involving nudity could not be used without the actor's permission. The studios could give in on a few more points (like, your image won't be used in political commercials) to make it more palatable…and then AFTRA would recommend the deal to its members for ratification. That would not be as easily rubber-stamped as these contracts usually are. For some thespians, that's a deal-killer right there…for personal reasons as much as the financial ones. At that point, you'd have actors rallying to reject the offer and the studios holding firm that they would not sit down with SAG's bargainers as long as the AFTRA deal was unresolved.

We could, in effect, have the actors' strike run by AFTRA — whose leadership seems terrified of a strike and ill-equipped to manage one — instead of by SAG, whose leadership is ready to go to the mat on this and other issues. There are additional ways this could play out, none of them pretty. Another, of course, is that AFTRA just folds and totally undermines the SAG position.

So is there going to be an actors' strike? Hard to say. A few months ago, I thought not…but the studios are playing harder ball than anyone imagined, probably because they figure the SAG-AFTRA rift has given them an opening. It may all depend on patching that rift, or at least on finding a way to make it work for the actors instead of against them. I guess I'll stick with my no-strike prediction but I must admit I'm less confident of it now than I was in April. And I'm starting to think that if there isn't, it will not be because the AMPTP decided to avoid one by being reasonable. It'll be because the actors divided and conquered themselves.

Two years ago today, I hauled my (then) 344 pound self over to a hospital and underwent Gastric Bypass Surgery. Sixty-five days later, I had lost sixty-five pounds and over the next year, another 40 or so went with them. Actually, my weight has fluctuated a lot in that time — which I'm told is not unusual — but I've basically lost a hundred pounds of me.

To answer the two biggest questions: No, I have not regretted it for one second. And no, I still do not recommend it for all. Not everyone will have as easy a time as I had. I think I got lucky and it also helped that apart from weighing way too much, I was otherwise in excellent health. When you hear the percentages about how many people die or have severe complications from that surgery, you need to remember that some who have it are in pretty bad shape before the operation.

I do recommend that if you need to lose that kind of poundage, you at least look into the possibility of Gastric Bypass…but there are some people who'd simply be better off to go another route.

My body continues to change. My taste for sweets mysteriously disappeared in January of this year. Certain odd muscle aches still pop up now and then, especially when I've been too busy to go see the Physical Trainer. Every now and then, I eat or drink too fast and I have to stop and breathe slowly for about five minutes to regain my equilibrium. These are all minor negatives. It's all still a lot better than when I was at my peak of 365.

Everyone in my life has pretty much gotten used to the new, smaller Evanier…so I get fewer and fewer odd reactions. I think my favorite moment — and I think I told this here before — was when I went in to appear in a video documentary on Mel Blanc for one of those Golden Age of Looney Tunes DVDs. I was in the make-up chair being dolled up and the lady applying the Max Factor to my face asked me if I had an older brother. I told her no. She said, "About a year ago, I made up a guy who looked a lot like you except that he was older and fatter." That alone was worth the price of the surgery.

Watching Recount, the HBO movie about the 2000 vote, I couldn't help but have the following thought…

An awful lot of people worked their asses off to make sure that George W. Bush prevailed in Florida. I'm sure most of them thought he won fairly and that Democrats were trying to steal the election, and that getting Bush certified as the victor was a matter of principle and fairness. I'm sure also that most of them thought that this was a matter of saving the world (or at least, America) from Al Gore and his agenda…because they'd be very unhappy with what would happen under a Gore administration.

George W. Bush is now extraordinarily unpopular. I don't mean just among Democrats. Independents think he's been a disaster and an awful lot of people who voted for him — twice, in some cases — now think he's the worst president of all time. I suspect his popularity rating is even lower than surveys say; that even some people who tell the pollsters they like him actually just like what they once believed he stood for…and cringe at what he's done to those causes and objectives. Three of my acquaintances who could not have been more pro-Bush in the last two elections are now angry with Dems for not impeaching the guy. Well, okay, we all back candidates who eventually disappoint us. That happens.

But the actions of the folks who worked for him in Florida during the recount period were extraordinary. Everything about that count was so damned sloppy. If they tallied the same pile of ballots three times, they got three different totals. Machines didn't work. People who were entitled to vote were refused. Ballots went wholly uncounted the first time, let alone received the ordered recounts. Somewhere amidst all those who helped deliver the state (and therefore, the Oval Office) to Bush, there had to be at least a few people who felt, as I do, that it was shameful that there were so many anomalies and questions about something as essential to the principles of this nation as an election. There had to be at least some who felt that the vote was impossible to calculate with any honesty, and it was all they could do to manipulate the recount so that Bush prevailed.

And somewhere in that few, there has to be at least one guy who was gung-ho for George W. Bush in 2000 and now, like those friends I mentioned, believes Bush has harmed this nation on almost every front: The war, the economy, the environment, you name it. Maybe this person has lost a loved one in battle. Maybe he's lost his home in the wild orgy of foreclosures. Maybe he's just horrified at the death toll in Iraq or watched the inept response to Katrina in New Orleans. Whatever the reason, he thinks Bush has done enormous damage…

I wonder how that person would feel today watching Recount. I wonder.

Hey, wanna watch a pretty good Laurel and Hardy movie on your computer? Here's a link to watch the 1940 film, A Chump at Oxford. The only thing better than Laurel and Hardy is free Laurel and Hardy. This runs about 63 minutes.

Those of you who are interested in the subject of low-cost generic drugs should take a look at this page over on the Snopes site. It'll send you to a number of other sources for info, including this page over on the Costco site. I should have remembered to mention that Costco is a great source of cheap prescriptions…and you don't even have to be a member to take advantage of their service.

…the Stupid Question, in this case, being "Who'll win the Reuben Award?" As every cartoonist alive expected, Al Jaffee won this evening as Cartoonist of the Year. Everyone in the room, I'm told, was very happy. Even Al.

Wiley Miller, who does the comic strip Non Sequitur, went ahead and congratulated Al in today's strip, which was drawn weeks ago. Here's a link that should take you to it, at least for a little while.

Dick Martin, the easy-going half of the comedy team of Rowan and Martin, died Saturday night at the age of 86. He had been ill for some time. In fact, one week ago at breakfast, his friend Gary Owens told me (sadly) that Dick probably didn't have long to live.

Obits like this one can give you the raw details of his life so I'll just add some personal observations. When Dan Rowan and Dick Martin teamed up in 1952, they were another in a long line of such teams that tried to replicate the success of Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis. There were hundreds of those parlays and most of them played a few night club gigs, then broke up and went into other lines of work. Rowan and Martin weren't only the most successful of that flood, they were darn near the only ones to last more than a few years.

The secret, some said, was that Rowan was a sharp businessman and Martin was genuinely funny and likeable. Dick Martin was, in fact, one of the nicest guys you could ever want to be around, with a loud, contagious laugh. He got along with everyone…and if the stress of any job ever got to him, he sure did a good job of not letting it show. I used to hang out occasionally on the set of Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In, where it was not uncommon to see Rowan lose his temper and yell. And then along would come Dick Martin, breezing onto the set at the last moment, and the entire mood of the studio would lighten. He had that magic.

It served him well as a comedian and later, after the team split up, it worked for him as director of situation comedies. I got to know him a little when he was doing one of his early directing jobs, helming a short-lived sitcom called The Waverly Wonders. That show shared office space with a show I was writing, and Dick was always coming over to our quarters to chat, tell jokes and just to be sociable. One time, our associate producer greeted him by reeling off about a dozen of the filthiest-possible sex acts — a list, he said, of fantasies he'd had about Dick's wife, Dolly.

There was a pause and then Dick pulled out a pad of paper, began making notes and said — with the precision timing of one-half of a great comedy team — "Hey, I should try some of those." And then he broke into that loud, wonderful laugh of his.

Dick and Dolly were a wonderful couple. She's a former Playboy model who was one of the stars of the legendary movie, Beyond the Valley of the Dolls. About fifteen years ago, there was a screening of that picture at UCLA with much of the cast in attendance, along with director Russ Meyer and screenwriter Roger Ebert. I took a cartoonist friend of mine, Carol Lay, and we wound up sitting in front of Dick and Dolly. As much fun as the movie was, it was even better to be eavesdropping on the Martins howling at the intentionally-funny parts of the film and convulsing at the unintentionally-funny moments.

That's what I've thought of ever since when anyone mentioned Dick Martin…the sheer joy that he and Dolly were sharing that afternoon. There's something beautiful about people who can be that happy.

That joy was, I think, the only reason Rowan and Martin were successful on stage. No one around them seemed to have much respect for Rowan as a performer. On Laugh-In, the crew cringed when he'd insist on playing characters and trying to be anything but a straight man. But to all those same folks, Dick Martin could do no wrong. It's sad to lose him and especially sad to lose that wonderful laugh.

Like you, I don't quite understand why Hillary Clinton is staying in the presidential race to the extent of looking foolish and/or too arrogant to face reality. I guess it has something to do with believing she'd be a more "electable" candidate than Obama — a view which is at least supported by some polls. But the idea that she can beat McCain (which may be true) is being undermined by her clinging to the idea that she can beat Obama (which is almost certainly not).

Also (probably) like you, I didn't understand this statement she made the other day. Here, for its one-millionth quoting on the Internet, is the money quote. Reacting to the suggestion that it's time she dropped out of the race, she said..

My husband did not wrap up the nomination in 1992 until he won the California primary somewhere in the middle of June, right? We all remember Bobby Kennedy was assassinated in June in California. I don't understand it.

The second part of that statement outraged a lot of people and triggered a wave of calls for her to do the noble thing and quit the race. Most of the calls, it seemed to me, came from folks who already wanted her to drop out. I agree it was a foolish, offensive thing to say…but in a sense, so was the first part of that paragraph.

Yeah, Bill Clinton didn't drop out in May. That was because it was still numerically possible (probable, actually) for him to get the nomination. In fact, I'll bet you that Bill could have pointed to every upcoming primary and uncommitted delegate and told you with reasonable accuracy where he'd get enough votes to secure the nomination. He was always pretty good at counting.

She has every right to stay in the race…and I don't think she's doing as much damage to the party as some people seem to fear/hope. But she sure is making me think less of her wisdom, if not her devotion to certain causes that will not be realized if McCain wins.

I've occasionally complained here about the rising cost of health care in this country. It's a topic I've read a lot about, and I've come to the conclusion that the dire tales are not exaggerated; that there really are families in this country — and not a small number of them — who have their lives financially destroyed when someone in the family gets ill. This includes a staggering number who have health insurance and think it will cover every contingency. There are also those who die because they can't afford good treatment.

For many, the daunting cost is prescriptions. Some medications are prohibitively expensive. In the last year, I've had five separate friends in the position of not being able to afford the pills that their doctors believe they need. Human beings should not be in that situation.

Here's something that may help someone. I don't think it's been publicized much but some big chain stores have inaugurated generic prescription deals. The Ralphs Market chain, for example, has a long list of medications you can get at their stores at the lovely price of four bucks for a 30 day supply. One of these is a medication that I used to take. It's the one I wrote about in this item that cost me $10 for a 60 day supply because of my insurance but which ran $91.88 if you didn't have insurance. That's quite a savings. Here's a page that tells all about the program.

The Walmart chain has a similar program and so do the Target stores. There may be others.

Some of you probably knew all about these offers but none of my friends who couldn't afford their pills knew about 'em. They just thought a prescription was something you took to your Friendly Neighborhood Pharmacy and the price there was the price. In case there's anyone reading this site who thinks that way, I wanted to mention these new generic programs.