Monthly Archives: August 2004

Mark Thorson, who is one of my band of loyal readers who instantly catches my every typo, writes to ask…

By the way, I may have failed to notice it, but a few months ago you had some articles on a possible impending Writer's Guild strike, and I don't remember that being followed up by an explanation of how that was resolved. Is it still impending or has the danger passed?

Rather amazingly — because no one in the industry would ever have imagined either side would allow this to occur — the Writers Guild is working without a contract and it has been since the old one expired May 1. Under the old "paradigm" (to use a noun that seems to be in vogue these days), we would have gone on strike soon after the expiration and/or the producers would have threatened to lock us out if we did not accept their "final offer." (I put that in quotes because…well, you know why I put that in quotes.) Neither a strike nor a lockout has happened. In fact, the WGA hasn't even taken a strike authorization vote. The leaders of the WGA decided to just go on, keeping the town and everyone working, waiting to see what would happen. The producers either haven't been able to get a lockout vote among its members — who must agree unanimously if there is to be a lockout — or they've decided to wait and force the issue at a moment that seems more advantageous to them. Smart money has it that they won't wait too long. If it gets around towards the middle of next year, that's when the current contracts expire for the Screen Actors Guild and the Directors Guild of America.

It has long been presumed that the studios' worst nightmare would be for the three above-the-line guilds to link arms and make joint demands at the same time. It's always seemed easier to beat one union (usually ours) into submission and rollbacks, then go on to the next. The bloody negotiation or strike intimidates the other unions and the producers then argue that "pattern bargaining" dictates that the other unions accept the same rollbacks. So logic and custom would suggest that in the next month or three, at a point where it would no longer disrupt the Fall TV schedule, the producers will press the issue with the WGA. This would, they hope, give them a momentum of union-stomping before they have to face SAG and the DGA. On the other hand, logic and custom would have dictated that we'd never go this long without a contract. So we're all in uncharted waters here and all we can do is hope for the best, brace for the worst and expect something in-between.

Know what today is? Okay, right, Wednesday. But this particular Wednesday marks 91 years since the birthing day of Walter Crawford Kelly, Jr. He wasn't much of an artist then but before long, he grew up to become one of the most honored, quoted cartoonists of all time. Those who know Pogo love Pogo and those who don't know Pogo…well, they don't know Pogo. Which is their loss. They've missed out on the best damn comic strip any newspaper ever offered its readers. But don't pity those folks…at least not today. Today, go out and hug a swamp critter, say something witty, sing a happy song and think about Walt Kelly. Even folks who never met him miss him.

Did John Kerry fib about spending Christmas Eve in Cambodia a few decades ago? Since I think all politicians utter the occasional untruth, it wouldn't be a big deal to me if he did lie, particularly about something so relatively unimportant. I certainly can't understand someone getting worked up over that but giving George W. Bush a pass on some of the whoppers he's tossed our way.

However, if it does matter to you whether or not Kerry's anecdote is absolutely accurate…well, here on the news from me page, we like to break precedent on the Internet and showcase two sides to a controversy. Even a small controversy. Here's an article that says Kerry's account doesn't hold up to scrutiny and here's an article that says it does. What I find interesting about the two pieces is not what they say about John F. Kerry but what they tell us about how two apparently bright men could research the same event and come to such different conclusions.

…but nobody does anything about them.

A clever and brave man named George Kirgo has died at the age of 78. George had a long and very happy career as a writer and occasional producer of TV and movies. His credits in motion pictures included Spinout and Don't Make Waves. In television, he wrote for The Mary Tyler Moore Show, Nichols, The Governor and J.J. and a short-lived but very fine series called Another Day. It is unmentioned in obits like this one but George also had a brief career as one of the first movie reviewers on television (mostly on local New York stations) and this led to a run of appearances on TV talk shows, including Jack Paar's. He also worked for a time with Harvey Kurtzman.

I got to know George because he kept turning up in the office next to mine. When I was doing Welcome Back, Kotter, George was next door producing Another Day. When I was writing The Bay City Rollers Show, George was in the next office writing and producing a TV movie called Side Show for the same producers. (It's absent from his Internet Movie Database listing.) But I really got to know the guy and to respect him when he was President of the Writers Guild during its long, anger-filled 1988 strike.

All strikes are messy but this one, which lasted 22 weeks, was way messier than the norm. George Kirgo, as president of the Guild, somehow managed to be president of all WGA members through a difficult period and keep members of varying positions together. Now and then on the picket lines, some writer, panicked about losing his home, would start screaming at George and look as if he might take a swing at this gentle, witty man. A couple of us taller folks became George's unofficial bodyguards but we weren't needed. Kirgo never flinched and Kirgo never feared, and on two or three occasions, I saw him take a frantic striker aside, talk calmly to him and dispell the terror and frustration. I greatly admired his leadership, his compassion and his willingness to give maximum effort for this elected position. The strike ended badly but it would have been a lot worse without George Kirgo. Today, the whole world is.

Matt Drudge just posted the story I had up here yesterday morning about the phony tornado prediction for Los Angeles. Given his usual record for accuracy, maybe we're both wrong.

I think I agree with Thomas Oliphant in his take on the whole Swift Boat controversy.

The New York Times, which has never run comic strips, offers this article about troubles in the newspaper comic strip business.

Well, I'm glad to see that Campaign Finance Reform has done such a fine job of protecting us from "attack ads." I haven't seen any negative commercials…have you? Making candidates say "I approved this message" has also been very successful in preventing them from not taking responsibility for the irresponsible bashing of their opponents.

We all knew this election was going to get dirty but somehow, I didn't think it would be this nasty until a week or two before Halloween. Here's what I see as the new timetable…

WEEK OF AUGUST 23: MoveOn.org runs commercials showing Bush not only reading My Pet Goat to school children on 9/11 but dressing up in actual goat costume to do so.

WEEK OF AUGUST 30: Governor James McGreevy holds shocking press conference to announce support for John Kerry because he has "hair to die from" and there are rumors he may be French. McGreevy also reaffirms that he is gay and that he will resign his office as soon as he finishes redecorating it.

WEEK OF SEPTEMBER 6: Democrats reveal that for the last month, Dick Cheney's "undisclosed location" has been the only movie theater in the country still showing the film, Catwoman. Cheney admits to more than 435 viewings of what he calls "an unfairly-maligned classic of the cinema" but denies reports that, confused and infatuated, he awarded a seven billion dollar "no bid" contract to Halle Berry.

WEEK OF SEPTEMBER 13: In reponse to relentless questioning from Helen Thomas, White House press secretary Scott McClellan says Bush will not comment on 527 ads that insist Kerry sang back-up vocals on 1974 pop hit, "Billy, Don't Be a Hero." McClellan adds gratuitous insult about Thomas's bra size.

WEEK OF SEPTEMBER 20: Kerry sticks tongue out at Bush, inserts thumbs in ears, waves fingers and goes, "Pookie-pookie-pookie!" Bush, during campaign swing through Ken Lay's living room, responds with old "I'm rubber, you're glue" line. Ralph Nader pulls ahead in most polls and celebrates by buying a second suit.

WEEK OF SEPTEMBER 27: In unexpected development, Gallup organization locates "likely voter" in Illinois who supports Alan Keyes. Poll is described as having a "margin-of-error of plus or minus one looney."

WEEK OF OCTOBER 4: Kerry campaign releases documents that prove that Bush spent missing months of his National Guard commitment appearing on TV sitcom Bewitched as the little-remembered third Darrin.

WEEK OF OCTOBER 11: The Swift Boat Veterans for Truth all suddenly remember Kerry bragging in 1969 about someday nailing a ketchup heiress and "scoring them big burger-basting bucks." The group's leader, John O'Neill, begins to show signs of fatigue when he goes on The O'Reilly Factor and accidentally spends forty minutes attacking the character of Jim Carrey.

WEEK OF OCTOBER 18: New York Times breaks exclusive story that contrary to public perception, there is still a war going on in Iraq. Article appears on page D-23, between a report on the economy and an article on nuclear proliferation in Korea.

WEEK OF OCTOBER 25: Bush accuses Kerry of cross-dressing, robbing a liquor store and running a crack house out of at least one of his eleven mansions. Kerry accuses Bush of molesting small animals, being on the grassy knoll during the Kennedy assassination, and quietly selling three of the blue states to Red China. In an even more scathing exchange, John Edwards accuses Dick Cheney of being Bush's running mate while Cheney accuses Edwards of being on the Democratic ticket. All four deny all charges while John McCain, speaking at Bush rally, repudiates everything Bush has said, then hugs and endorses him.

WEEK OF NOVEMBER 1: America's voters, disgusted by months of negative campaigning and lies, decide en masse that they don't want any of these guys. No one goes to the polls or mails in an absentee ballot but Bush somehow manages to get several million votes in Florida and any state serviced by Diebold voting machines. United States Supreme Court is on vacation but they have left behind instructions that, by a 5-4 margin, any election challenges are to be decided in favor of the Republican. Population of Iraq decides that if this is democracy, they'd rather have Saddam back. Instead, since he isn't available, they elect Alan Keyes who moves there just in time to qualify as a resident. U.S. Democrats declare they're angry and vow to fight harder next time. Or maybe the time after.

I subscribe to an e-mail service that sends out weather forecasts. This morning at 8:39, they sent out one that began…

THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN OXNARD HAS ISSUED A TORNADO WARNING FOR CENTRAL LOS ANGELES COUNTY IN SOUTHWEST CALIFORNIA UNTIL 915 AM PDT

AT 825 AM PDT…NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE DOPPLER RADAR WAS TRACKING A LARGE AND EXTREMELY DANGEROUS TORNADO 7 MILES SOUTH OF GLENDALE… OR ABOUT NEAR DOWNTOWN LOS ANGELES… MOVING NORTHEAST AT 20 MPH. THE TORNADO IS EXPECTED TO BE NEAR PASADENA BY 850 AM PDT…MOUNT WILSON BY 905 AM PDT

…and then there were instructions on how to take cover during a tornado. By the time you read them, you would have received the following e-mail that I received one minute later…

PLEASE DISREGARD THE PREVIOUS TORNADO WARNING. NO TORNADO EXISTS.

Many things changed the comic book industry in the early eighties but none more than Pacific Comics, a San Diego-based firm founded by Steve and Bill Schanes. Pacific had an amazing rise and fall, and on the way up, they had the top execs at DC and Marvel scurrying about, trying to make their companies "creator-friendly." By the time Pacific (and a few other like companies) had crashed and burned, comics were a somewhat better field to work in…and for some, no longer a field from which one had to escape.

For that and other reasons, the saga of Pacific is an important story so I want to direct you to this historical piece written by Jay Allen Sanford, who worked there for a time. A few "facts" do not jibe with my understanding but most of it seems pretty sound. Thanks to Rob Rose for pointing it out to me.

You may recall that on his recent tour, Eric Idle kept a witty, engrossing day-to-day online diary. It will soon be out in book form. You can pre-order it from Amazon by clicking here.

In the meantime, Mr. Idle has written a Broadway-style adaptation of Monty Python and the Holy Grail and it will be heading for Broadway early next year. He is keeping a less formal but still interesting online diary about this venture, as well. Here is the first installment and here is the second.

I've solved my e-mail problems…I think. At least, I've found all the mail that was sent to me the last few days. Now, if you wrote and I haven't replied, it's only because I'm a lousy correspondent.

Still haven't solved my cell phone problems but that may take a little while. Anyone here have any experience with the Motorola V400 phone? I need to "trade up" to a newer model from either Nokia or Motorola and the V400 looks like a goodie. (Needless to say, there will be better models out in a month or so…but when will there ever not be better models out in a month or so?)

Posting may be light here for the next few days but I will report back on the experiments my friend Earl and I have been doing on video editing software. I'll also run some of your messages on colorization. I just have to catch up on deadlines and e-mail. Oh, yeah…and sleep. Sleep would be nice.

So what's former Saturday Night Live cast member Joe Piscopo doing these days? You're in for a surprise.