Monthly Archives: December 2003

Justin Foster (a reader of this site) informs me that Thurl Ravenscroft's narration on the Disneyland Railroad has been replaced by another voice. I will never ride it again.

Eric Idle has finished his "Greedy Bastard Tour" which means (sadly) that he's finished his online tour diary. I dunno how long they'll leave it up over on this web page but I suggest you go enjoy it now, while you still can. A wonderful read it is…and certain installments, especially the last few, will give you a good idea of why it's unlikely we will ever again see the surviving Monty Python guys reunite for much of anything.

By the way: Carol Cleveland, who played women for Python whenever they needed a real one, now has her own website.

Quite a few folks have e-mailed me links to obits like this one for Harold von Braunhut, the man who invented and marketed the "Amazing Sea Monkeys." Most of the pieces spoke admiringly of his ability to merchandise odd items, and I suppose that's worthy of a salute. But I wonder how many children were traumatized at an early age because they sent their allowances off to order the Amazing Sea Monkeys and learned that advertising does not always convey the exact truth. The Amazing Sea Monkeys were not monkeys and they did not come from the sea. Worse, they did not become goofy little families with hair ribbons and blonde hair and happy (or even any) faces as seen in the ads. (If you'd like to see what a real "Sea Monkey" looks like, go to this site.) Mr. von Braunhut's x-ray specs also did not let you see through walls or clothing, either.

As a matter of fact, if you put on the x-ray specs, you still couldn't see the joyous expressions of the Sea Monkeys, which were about half the size of ants, if that large. Neither purchase gave you more than about three minutes of semi-enjoyment, followed by an overwhelming feeling of having been taken, plus one or more parents saying, "Let this be a valuable lesson to you." That was about all the Sea Monkeys were good for, except that for a time, the Denny's restaurant chain was breading and deep-frying them and serving five on a plate with cole slaw as their Fisherman's Seafood Platter. You know, they weren't bad that way.

I had a pretty good time watching The Haunted Mansion, the new movie based on the Disneyland attraction of the same name. I liked that the special effects blended so seamlessly with reality. I liked that the film started slow and gave you the chance to get to know the people before zombies began chasing them. I liked that Eddie Murphy played a reasonably intelligent person and didn't turn into Mantan Moreland when the ghosts began flying. Come to think of it, I liked that the subtle racial aspects of the plot were never even mentioned.

I especially liked that there was a plot — a fairly solid one, given that the film was based on just about nothing, and that films that are heavy in visual effects often skip over that teensy aspect of moviemaking. (Quick summary: Murphy and his wife, played by Marsha Thomason, are realtors who get the chance to broker a huge, mega-commission mansion. They and their kids get trapped inside for a night along with a spooky butler, the master of the house who thinks Murphy's wife is his long lost love, and a mess of ghosts, one of whom is Wallace Shawn. If I tell you any more than that, I'll kill it for you.)

Let's see…what else did I like? I liked the fact that in the end credits, long after everyone had left and the ushers were sweeping up popcorn boxes around me, I saw the filmmakers make special recognition of the late Paul Frees and the still-with-us Thurl Ravenscroft. Paul, of course, was the narrator of the Disneyland ride, and the opening lines of the film are uttered by Corey Burton, flawlessly imitating Paul. Thurl Ravenscroft is one of Hollywood's great vocalists, best known for providing the voice of Tony the Tiger, and for singing "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch," in the Chuck Jones animation of How the Grinch Stole You-Know-What. Thurl, who will be honored with a special trophy at the Annie Awards in February, was the bass voice on hundreds of records and film soundtracks during his career. This website chronicles a small percentage of his amazing body of work.

Thurl is heard all over Disneyland — on the Disneyland Railroad, in the Pirates of the Carribean, everywhere. In the Haunted Mansion, Thurl is heard as the main voice in the song, "Grim, Grinning Ghosts," and his face is seen on one of the singing busts. (The busts are in the movie, by the way. In fact, they provide a couple of the best moments.)

I don't have a lot more to say about the film because, like I said, you'll enjoy it more if you go in, not knowing what to expect. But it's been a while since I saw a movie so filled with special effects that made me forget I was looking at special effects.

Phil Sears is an autograph collector who specializes in genuine signatures of Walt Disney. Over at his website, he's posted a long, handwritten letter by Walt. It was penned in 1923 and it's to the parents of the little girl who played Alice in his semi-animated films. It's an interesting look into the mind of Mr. Disney and you can see it here.

Still getting things repaired. We are running on the new 2.65 version of the Movable Type weblog software, which was released today. (The reason it took so long was that rather than install the previous version, I decided to wait for 2.65.) Anyway, I have to finish an assignment and then I'll get the Search function working again and all will be reasonably back to normal. Thank you for your patience.

…then things are almost fixed here.

In 1983, I had an amazing ten-day period during which I wrote the pilot scripts and bibles for three Saturday morning cartoon shows…one for ABC, one for NBC and one for CBS. (A bible, by the way, is an overview of a prospective series that tells who the characters are, how they function, where they live, etc.) Amazingly, all three shows "sold" to some extent. I wound up taking my name off the ABC one, and the NBC one was announced as on the schedule, then bumped by a last-minute deal with Mr. T. NBC had wanted to do a cartoon show with him but he wanted too much money, so they tentatively bought this other show which I developed. A day or two later, someone decided to meet Mr. T's price and my show went away, which was probably just as well.

The CBS show was called Dungeons and Dragons, based loosely on the role-playing game. Others, especially a clever gent named Dennis Marks, had worked out characters and an overview of how to turn the game into a cartoon show, but the network folks were not happy with either the bible or pilot script, which is how come I got the call. I literally finished the ABC pilot one morning and started on the CBS one the same day. For more on this, you might want to consult this article. I had relatively little to do with the program after the pilot and one other episode I wrote, but some fine writers and artists made it into a three season hit that still has an amazing following.

The show spawned at least two urban legends that have ricocheted around the Internet. One is that it was cancelled due to pressure groups that were upset about the content and/or about the game on which it was based. This is not true. It was cancelled because the ratings were dropping steadily throughout its third season. The other legend is that a "last episode" was produced which wrapped up the ongoing storyline of the series. This also is not true, though I have encountered many folks who swear they saw one. My pal Michael Reaves, who was one of the writers on the show, did write a script for a "last episode" but it was never produced. You can read it over on Michael's website. It's not how I would have ended the series but everyone can decide for themselves whether or not they want to consider it part of the canon.

Last year, one of the other writers who worked on the show sold his Xerox of my bible on eBay for a helluva lot of money. This prompted a couple of the unsuccessful bidders to write to me to ask if I could sell them copies or even my originals. I was uncomfortable with the whole notion so I gave my originals (of both the bible and the pilot script) to a charity-type project and now, months later, they've found their merry way to the Marketplace of America, eBay. Here's the listing and at the moment, it's up to $12.75. This is several hundred bucks short of what an unsigned Xerox copy of just the bible sold for so maybe there's a terrific bargain to be had. The money doesn't go to me but I'd still like to see it go for a little higher price than this.

Still updating by hand while I wait for the "automatic update" functions of this weblog to be fixed. It's outta my hands at the moment but I didn't want you lovely folks to think I'd forgotten you. I feel like I'm in a house without plumbing or electricity: The Search function isn't working, the Permalinks are out of commission, and new postings are not scrolling off onto the Archive pages. But I am here for you.

The news about Julius Schwartz all seems good. Harlan Ellison's Message Board is the place to go if you want to read more.

Given the limitation of emotion it is possible to convey in an e-mail, several of you managed to seem uncommonly aghast at the fact that veteran character actor Charles Lane is still alive. Last I heard, he was. He will be 99 years old in about six weeks.

And while we're at it, let's all throw our voices to wish a Happy Birthday to the world's greatest ventriloquist, Paul Winchell, who turns 81 tomorrow. That still seems rather young to me when I recall that the last time I saw Paul in person was at a birthday party for the great Señor Wences, who was 100 that evening. In fact, Paul introduced me to the guest of honor by saying, "I'd like you to meet a ventriloquist older than me."

But enough about old guys. I've posted a column of mine that was originally published in March of '00. It summarizes some thoughts that I had at the time when I would occasionally mention a current political situation in a comic book I was writing and people would react like I'd slipped in a few mystic Voodoo Hex symbols guaranteed to cause paralysis of the genitalia. Here's the article and obviously, I'm posting it because I think some of what it says is still relevant.

Back with more when things are fixed here in the spiderhole. And isn't it cute how swiftly that noun joined our collective vocabulary?

Yet another member of the cast of It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World has passed away. Madlyn Rhue had a tiny but memorable role as Spencer Tracy's secretary and was later a regular on one of my favorite "trashy" TV shows, Bracken's World. Her career and life were hampered by Multiple Sclerosis but she kept on working as long as she could. A brave lady.

Every so often, I get an e-mail asking me which members of the cast of that legendary film are still with us. Sid Caesar, Mickey Rooney, Jonathan Winters, Peter Falk, Dorothy Provine and Edie Adams are all around. So are Arnold Stang and Marvin Kaplan. I am awaiting my annual Christmas card from Arnold.) So are Stan Freberg, Carl Reiner, Don Knotts, Barrie Chase, Charles Lane, Nick Georgiade, several stunt people and Jerry Lewis. That's a small percentage of the cast but it's more than most folks seem to expect when they ask that question.

Still doing manual updates here but I wanted to mention that and I also wanted to post a TV listing. Some time ago, I told this story about something silly that occurred back when I was working on Welcome Back, Kotter. Even though the anecdote doesn't have much to do with the episode (and even though it wasn't one of the better episodes done while I was there), several folks asked me to let them know when it was on again. Well, TV Land is running it this coming Sunday evening. It's called "Hark, the Sweatkings" and it airs at 9:30 PM on my TV. Check, as they say, your local listing. In fact, look over the whole schedule. TV Land is running a marathon of Christmas episodes this weekend, including episodes of shows not normally on their schedule.

By the way: If you catch the Kotter episode, the uncredited guy playing Santa Claus in the closing tag was one of the writers, a lovely man named Neil Rosen. Neil worked on a number of TV shows but his first love was the theater. The minute he made some real money in television, he and his friend Pat Paulsen bought and restored the Cherry County Playhouse in Traverse City, Michigan. This was (and still is) one of those theaters that imports TV stars to intermingle with local actors and if you look over their list of past productions, you'll see some fascinating bits of stunt casting. (Bob Keeshan in The Wizard of Oz? Jamie Farr in My Fair Lady? Don Knotts in Harvey and Last of the Red Hot Lovers? Buddy Ebsen in The Last Meeting of the Nights of White Magnolia?) Neil died way too young but he'd be proud to know the theater is still up and running and featuring John Davidson in Chicago.

Also: I didn't see it but several folks have told me that The Simpsons did a brilliant parody this year on Mr. Magoo's Christmas Carol. I've set the old TiVo to record that episode when it runs again on Monday the 22nd.

The Internet comics community is erupting with news that famed DC editor Julius Schwartz is hospitalized and hovering near death. A few folks have even started offering condolences, and I'm getting e-mails asking if I've heard anything. (As we all know, no one in the comic book business is actually deceased until Evanier posts the obit…)

I know no more than Harlan Ellison has been posting on his message board, which is that Julie is hospitalized with pneumonia. Given that the man is over 88, this is obviously cause for concern. But I might spread a little cautious optimism by pointing out that Julie has been hospitalized for pneumonia before and still managed to make it to subsequent comic conventions. I would also remind all that in May of 2002, a lot of the same forums were reporting on the impending death of Julie's friend, Forrest Ackerman, and Ackerman is still with us. And I always remember a day a few decades ago when two comic fans I knew said, "We have to go visit Carl Barks before he dies." Barks was in his mid-seventies then and he not only lived to age 99, he managed to outlive both of those comic fans.

I spoke to Julie about a week ago and he sounded the way he always sounds…cranky and old. But he sounded that way when I met him in 1970. Whenever I hear more, I'll post it here. In the meantime, let's not bury the guy before we have to.

Of less importance: I am still hand-coding my posts to this weblog, which is why there haven't been many of them. I hope to have this situation cured in the next few days, during which time you may see some bizarre, incomplete things on this page as I do the reinstall. Don't be baffled if things occasionally are a little odd. Or let's just say "odder than usual."

Do you get the feeling that not one human being in this country really cares about bringing Saddam Hussein to justice for moral reasons? All anyone seems to care about is how it might affect the possible re-election of George W. Bush.

Fellow party guest Gordon Kent, who got her card, informs me that the maker of Incredible Balloon Creations at the party last night was Shellyann Blanchard. If you're having an event in the Southern California area and want to hire a true artisan, I think this page will tell you how to contact her. I would have asked her to create a Groo balloon but I was afraid it would stab all the other balloons.

Last evening, I attended a very nice Christmas party at the home of my good pal, Paul Dini. The place was packed with interesting and beautiful people but one impressed me enough to cause me to haul out my pocket Nikon. For entertainment, Paul had engaged a young lady who spent the evening making balloon animals…but not the usual giraffes and horsies. This woman (and I regret I didn't get her name; I'll call Paul tomorrow and get it and post it) was taking ordinary balloons and turning them into spiders and beavers and odd, intricate creatures. They were really stunning. One person handed her a little toy Daffy Duck from Paul's den and challenged her to replicate it with balloons. As you can see, she did…in about six minutes.

That's all made from plain ol' skinny balloons and a few rubber bands. The bulging eyes are one white balloon filled partway and bisected by the uninflated section of a black balloon that forms part of Daffy's body and the back of his head. Then she used a black marker to draw eyeballs on it and isn't that just brilliant? Maybe it was the simplicity and speed that got to me but I thought, "I've got to take a picture of that and run home and put it up on my website." Even though I'm still coding these damn pages by hand.

It may not look it but we have had a system crash here and I am unable to update this page automatically. I'm posting this one message by hand…and boy, is it awkward. There probably won't be many new messages here until I get the software fixed, which may take a day or three. Or more. But it will get fixed. (And the Search function is out of commission until then, too. Sorry.)