Rarely having time to cook, I love pre-packaged, instant, so-simple-a-chowderhead-could-do-it products. Mostly, it's a matter of scheduling. When I decide it's time to eat, I don't want to start cooking then; I want the food done and ready to devour. This is why I like Express Bake PotatOH!s. These are pre-scrubbed taters that come sealed in plastic. You just stick them in your microwave for 7-8 minutes. By the time you set the table and wash your mitts, the thing is edible. But that's not the main thing I like about them. I like one line in the teeny instruction manual that comes with each one. It says — and this is a direct quote — "PotatOH! may whistle in microwave."
Wouldn't that be wonderful? Wouldn't you love to have your potato whistle a happy little tune while it's baking? Maybe a chorus of, "I Only Have Eyes For You." So far, none of the ones I've microwaved have whistled for me but I'm going to keep cooking them until one does.