Truly Amazing!

This is kinda funny.  I was just over at www.amazingkreskin.com — and you don't have to be The Amazing Kreskin to guess that that's the official website of The Amazing Kreskin.  It still displays his fearless predictions for 2002, such as "If [Gary] Condit chooses to run for re-election, he will win."

There are clippings and current U.F.O. predictions and all sorts of nonsense, and I also love Kreskin's Photo Gallery in which "the bona fide mentalist" cannot seem to even identify many of the people with him in the photographs.  There's a picture of Kreskin with George Kirby, but no one seems to have been able to remember George's name, so the caption is "Kreskin with famous impressionist."  There's another one of him with "one of New York's leading weathermen" and one of him with "an actor from Law and Order" but he couldn't divine the names of these people.  But the real treat is this announcement…

I have always used my mental abilities to predict specific events in other people's lives and while looking into the minds of others I have often discovered things that I would rather not have seen.  At first, this bizarre twist to my chosen profession took me by surprise, but as I grew accustomed to it I learned how to ignore the bad and concentrate on the good.  Now for my latest stunt, I have set all fear of my own mortality aside, turned my perception on myself, and decided to share my death with the world before it even happens.

He has not yet revealed the details of how he is going to share his death with us.  But judging from his list of upcoming appearances, it probably involves playing a dwindling string of low-profile benefits and out-of-the-way showrooms.