Casting Call

Currently playing in both New York and Los Angeles is a show called Puppetry of the Penis.  It consists, as I understand it, of two men who come out on stage nude and proceed to twist and adorn their genitalia into unusual images, all of which are projected on a large screen.  My initial reaction when I heard this was that someone sat down one day and said, "Hmm…what kind of production can we create that we're absolutely guaranteed Mark Evanier won't want to see?"  And if that was the thinking, they can relax: I don't.  But I did laugh out loud when I saw the following casting notice posted over on the Backstage website…

PUPPETRY OF THE PENIS
Open auditions for Aspiring Penis Puppeteers.  Must have own equipment.

Like I said, I have no interest in seeing this show.  One reason is that, when I was a kid, my friend Carl kept performing it.  Every time we used either of our Magnajectors, he'd wait until I turned away for a moment, unzip his fly and project his johnson on the wall and announce it was Pinky the Elephant.  I'm not sure if he thought this was just a great joke (if so, he was wrong) or if he had the idea that, once he started dating, he'd take his Magnajector along and try to impress the ladies.  Alas, even at the highest magnification, Pinky wasn't too impressive.