Well, he didn't disappoint. We all expected James Traficant's address to Congress to be rambling and incoherent and full of wild-eyed conspiracy theories…and he even managed to get to an anal joke in his first five minutes. Aside from donning women's clothing or biting off part of somebody's ear, there wasn't much he could have done to make it more embarrassing. Maybe if he'd dropped his pants and fired a rocket.
The thing I find especially funny is that Traficant received one vote and it wasn't his own. He abstained, or perhaps he wasn't allowed to vote. No, he got one vote and if you didn't hear who cast it, think for a second. Who would it be? If you were trying to think of the perfect way to cap this thing off and create fodder for Mr. Leno's monologue, who would have be the one member of Congress to vote against Traficant's expulsion from the House?
Yeah, it was him…a little present to say, "Thank you for making me no longer the biggest sleaze in Congress." (If you still haven't figured out who it was, click here to consult an article about the vote.)
I'd like to think we haven't heard the last of James A. Traficant. He's probably going to prison but when he gets out, he'll be back…maybe as a radio talk show host…maybe as the commercial spokesperson for Preparation H. He'll turn up somewhere. Heck, if the rules allow it, he could even run again and probably win. By that time, with all the indictments and convictions were likely to see in the financial scandals, he'll look positively honest by comparison. Beam me up!