Milton of the Movies

leavethemlaughing

Here's a very early "Set your TiVo" alert.  One of the times I chatted with Milton Berle, someone (not me) brought up the subject of him stealing material from other comics.  He semi-exploded on the topic, saying it was just an act, a fictional flaw he'd milked for laughs the way Jack Benny had allowed the world to think he was cheap.  He stole jokes when he started out, Berle said, but everyone did, and they stole them from each other.  ("The guy I stole a gag from stole it from someone else and he stole it from someone else…")  Once he became an established pro, he claimed, he never knowingly stole anything from anyone.  This view does not seem to have been shared by any of his friends and peers, but let's leave that aside for now.

That day we spoke, he denounced the charge as a smear on the part of jealous, less successful comedians and noted that, when you're Mr. Television, the number one comic on TV, every other comedian is, by definition, a "less successful comedian."  The one he singled out as most often spreading the slur was Bert Lahr and he said approximately the following to me.  (This is my memory; not a recorded quote.)

I did a movie called Always Leave Them Laughing and it was my movie.  It was at the peak of my stardom so I owned a hunk of it and I had every kind of script and cast approval you could possibly have.  I had final cut and I even directed part of the movie because the director took ill.  It was about a younger comic, played by me, who steals an older comedian's act and his wife.  You see, I wasn't afraid to play a joke stealer because I knew it was just a character.  It wasn't me.  Anyway, it was my idea to cast Lahr as the older comic.  I thought he'd be great in the part and he was.  He was a terrific comedian and actor.  However, after the film came out, Lahr was suddenly telling everyone that I tried to cut him out of the picture, that I ruined his best scenes.  Bert's son wrote a book about him [Notes on a Cowardly Lion] in which he repeated these charges.  They're bull but don't take my word for it.  Read the book.  See what Lahr said about the movie and what he says I did.  Then watch the movie.  It's on The Late, Late Show every ten minutes.  You'll see that Lahr is terrific in that movie.  Yeah, one or two of his scenes hit the cutting room floor.  Ten or fifteen of mine got cut.  Scenes get cut out of every movie.  But you watch the movie and see if Lahr isn't great and if I'm not supporting him in every scene we have together, letting him be great.  He's got this great dying scene and I could have horned in on it, had them cut away to my reactions more and stuck in a lot of dialogue for my character but I didn't.  Because it was Bert's scene and it worked best to let it be his scene.  But like I said, don't take my word for it.  Read the book, watch the movie and if you believe I tried to hurt his performance, then all the things they say about me must be true.  I will stake my reputation on that.

That's almost exactly what Mr. Berle said, and "I will stake my reputation on that" is verbatim.  But he was wrong that Always Leave Them Laughing is on TV every ten minutes.  It airs almost never and I haven't had the chance to catch it since that day, which was close to twenty years ago.  It is, however, airing on Turner Classic Movies on April 25…so let's all tune in and see if all the things they say about Berle must be true.